Meet Erin Tillman

We recently connected with Erin Tillman and have shared our conversation below.

Erin, we’re thrilled to have you on our platform and we think there is so much folks can learn from you and your story. Something that matters deeply to us is living a life and leading a career filled with purpose and so let’s start by chatting about how you found your purpose.
It’s felt like a long, winding road to find my purpose, but if I look back, I was always headed in this direction even though I didn’t have a plan. I knew that I wanted to do something connected to entertainment, something with a lot of social aspects, but also something with intentionality and connected to self-improvement and communication. If someone had asked me if I was searching for these qualities, I’m not sure I could’ve listed them out like this, but subconsciously I was weeding out things that didn’t align with these things.

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
I currently do two different things professionally under the umbrella of sexuality.

1. I’m a Certified Intimacy Coordinator for TV/Film. This career has been gaining stream in the tv/film industry over the past few years after being spotlighted around the time of the #MeToo movement. Intimacy Coordinators are hired by productions to assist with intimate scenes that involve nudity or simulated sexual situations. We do help to make sure that the actors’ boundaries are respected during this scenes, but we also can be helpful with choreography of the intimate scenes as well. We have been compared to stunt coordinators, but for intimate scenes. Ultimately, we are there to help performers feel comfortable to bring their best performance to scenes that can be sensitive in nature and can bring on nervousness or anxiety. I’ve been working in the tv/film industry for 20 years, but the past couple years working as an Intimacy Coordinator have been deeply fulfilling and rewarding.

2. I’m a Certified Sex Educator. This part of my career involves facilitating workshops, teaching at events, consulting, and private coaching around the topics of sexuality, identity, dating, non-monogamy, kink/bdsm, and diversity/equity/inclusion (DEI). Oftentimes, I team up with companies, organizations and non-profits. I started this part of my career over 10 years ago, with a focus on dating and connection, and slowly but surely, my curiosity of other topics grew and my professional interests expanded.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
1. Being open-minded – Sexuality as a profession is not for the faint of heart. It takes a lot of empathy, listening, and holding space with and for people who are living their truth in a variety of ways. The more open-minded you are, the more connections can be made.

2. Being curious – This field is ever-expanding and ever-evolving. The learning never stops! I’m always excited to learn about new terms, lingo, dating/relationship styles, apps, etc. It’s really important to stay current in this profession.

3. Being flexible – This profession is not typical. The hours are not typical, The pay is not typical. The frequency of work is not typical. I do know some Sex Educators who have more stability in one or more of these areas, but it’s not typical. I would argue that if someone is looking for guaranteed stability and a regular schedule, this is not the career path for them. However, for those who enjoy a freelance lifestyle, and the excitement of new opportunities, new environments, and a variety of experiences, this is definitely something that could be a good fit.

Okay, so before we go we always love to ask if you are looking for folks to partner or collaborate with?
I’m always looking for new colleagues, companies, schools/colleges/universities, non-profits, and organizations to partner with where it feels in alignment. Sex Education is not fully embraced in this country, so I get really excited when I connect with entities that see the value and importance in it. Sex Education covers a huge umbrella, including, but not limited to consent & boundaries, identities, dating/relationship styles, sexuality, pleasure, inclusivity, accessibility, allyship, self-care, and so much more. I’m currently very interested in partnering with entities and individuals who are enthusiastic about creating opportunities for people to freely explore and learn from knowledgeable experts to learn more about their true selves, communicate with more integrity, and consensual connection without feeling shame. This profession really needs doners and investors to thrive, so connection to those who have access to financial resources is always appreciated.

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