Meet Gabrielle Sterbenz

We were lucky to catch up with Gabrielle Sterbenz recently and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Gabrielle, thanks for sharing your insights with our community today. Part of your success, no doubt, is due to your work ethic and so we’d love if you could open up about where you got your work ethic from?

Growing up, I actually did not have much work ethic at all. As the third and last child of my family, I was often left to my own devices, with very little supervision in the ways of helping me learn what hard work was, how to do it, and what the benefits were for long-term happiness. I mostly got by on minimum effort and whatever innate abilities I had. I ran on inspiration and impulse, and wasn’t able to work past disinterest, boredom, or emotional discomfort. That approach compounded over the years, resulting in several humiliating on-stage experiences where I would be performing, and I performed so poorly, and so much below my own standards, that I would be a puddle of sweat onstage, consumed by embarrassment – forgotten lines, wrong lyrics, guitar flubs – I would think back to those experiences and be consumed with dread. I constantly felt like I wasn’t reaching my potential, and that led to me feeling depressed and defeated. At that point, I knew I needed to change how I was doing things. With the help of different types of therapy (including cognitive behavioral, EMDR, inner child work, performance anxiety work) and with the guidance of my partner, who is also a singer/songwriter, I slowly developed better work habits, and learned that daily practice, working through discomfort, and examining why I may be resisting things I know I need to do, are all gifts I give myself, and that fills me with a feeling that I am better living up to my own potential. And that makes me want to keep going.

Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?

I am a singer/songwriter and guitarist. Most of my music would be considered Americana, but I also have jazz, Gospel, and rock influences. I have performed my music in 49 of the 50 US states, Australia, and the UK and EU. I am also a backing vocalist in the band Wheatus, whose song “Teenage Dirtbag” is widely known. I have opened for Wheatus on many international tours.

Most recently, I opened for the Wheatus acoustic tour of the US in the fall of 2025. I’ve started adding some really fun elements to my live show, namely, a stomp pedal, and a looper so that I can build my own backing vocals on stage, and then sing lead over them. I love singing and arranging harmonies, but can’t always have other musicians on stage with me. The looper is a really fun way for me to sing in harmony when it’s just me on stage.

My new single “End of the Affair” comes out October 17th. It is from my forthcoming album “Icky Guy.”

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

The first thing I would say, is that anyone who wants to grow and improve in whatever they’re doing, has to be willing and able to look at themselves critically. If you cannot see your own faults and shortcomings, you have no hope of improving them. One of the most critical skills I learned from my mom, is the willingness to look at yourself, where you need to improve, and find the way to do it better next time. I feel that most people are unwilling to admit fault, and I think that is the most detrimental thing on anyone’s journey. It takes strength to look inward, and discover in your heart of hearts, where you need to do better.

Secondly, don’t be dissuaded from doing something because you think you’re not good at it. I thought I wasn’t a songwriter. I developed that skill extremely late in the game. I also started ballet and guitar very late. It’s ok to feel like a doofus. Work past feeling like you have no idea what you’re doing. Work past discomfort and embarrassment. There are gifts when you do. Am I going to be a ballerina? No. Does it give me joy and has it positively impacted my life in unexpected ways? Heck yes.

Lastly, practice whatever you do daily. You cannot shortcut the work. If you want to be free under pressure, you need to have built all the muscle memory, and that takes time. There’s no way around that.

Alright so to wrap up, who deserves credit for helping you overcome challenges or build some of the essential skills you’ve needed?

My partner, Brendan, who is the frontman of the band Wheatus, has helped me so much to overcome challenges. I’ve never known anyone who is as focused and hardworking as Brendan. And he will do anything that needs doing. He will learn how to do anything and everything himself. If there is an issue, be it in the studio, out on the road, anything, he will dive in and figure it out. Even if it is fixing the toilet on the tour bus, he gets in there and does it. He is not afraid of hard work, or challenges, or struggles. And especially with my lackadaisical upbringing, seeing the example that Brendan sets, has been an enormous teacher for me. Where I used to shy away from problems, now I jump in to figure them out.

Contact Info:

Image Credits

Gabrielle White, Jane Greenwood, Shervin Lainez, Saintsphoto, itsdickspics

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