We were lucky to catch up with Jamie Wozny recently and have shared our conversation below.
Jamie, we’re so excited for our community to get to know you and learn from your journey and the wisdom you’ve acquired over time. Let’s kick things off with a discussion on self-confidence and self-esteem. How did you develop yours?
I’ve always been willing to be wrong. To be imperfect. To be messy. To get out there and try. (Even when I felt confused, lost, not enough.) And fail. And feel the hot shame of that. Tend to myself. Find others to hug me as needed. Get back up and go again.
Within that I’ve always had a deep know that I was meant to do some sort of light work, love work, healing work on the planet. So that perhaps has been a deeper through line as I’ve learned.
I let myself have training wheels at first too. Like when I first started teaching meditation I would write notes down and one day I gained the courage to let my notes go. I then saw I could come up with an entire hour talk for people with just a note of one topic written down. It took a lot of years of knowledge to get to that point and trust that I had that capacity within me.
I learned that creativity and genius show up when you do. So I had to be willing to potentially get it all wrong to show up with a blank slate, in whatever capacity that was. Be it, me creating a course or going live on a platform. And I could see that when I slowed down and co created with the divine, a beautiful art piece of teaching came through.
In summary, a lot of years of trying a lot of different things and seeing what worked. Tending to the “ows” that arise along the way. On a courageous journey like this. one gains confidence and self esteem by doing, taking aligned actions and then you look back and think, “Wow, I did that?! I became that?!”
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
I was enjoying my first meal back, post detox at a trendy La eatery. Gluten Free Vegan Buffalo Cauliflower Pizza. I stood up to leave and knew something was seriously wrong with me. I couldn’t walk to the car. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t move. Everything shut down. I started sobbing. My boyfriend rushed me to urgent care. They told me I was fine which I knew wasn’t the case. I went to my naturopath and she hooked me up all these fluids. But for months after my body didn’t want to move. Standing up to do the dishes was painfully challenging. I couldn’t breathe. It was as if the life was taken from me. I had struggled with health challenges for quiet some time but my difficulty breathing was the scariest symptom. I was confused, angry, scared, helpless, hopeless. What was happening to me and why did no one have any answers?
So began the deepest part of my healing journey. I had already been on this journey some years before but the moment my body really broke down was the moment I went deeply within to begin to heal. For years I don’t think I knew what was really going on but as I’ve gotten my life back I’ve begun to see what was at the root of it all. I had hives, asthma, Lyme disease, autoimmune, fatigue, debilitating period pain & anxiety to name a few.
At this time in my life I never felt safe or enough. I was also terrified of rejection so I had an invisible habit of self rejection. If I had to sum it up in one word it would be AFRAID. I longed for connection but at the same time avoided it. I felt deeply uncared for and unsupported by life. Angry seeing others who had what I wanted, when I didn’t. I rushed through everything. I felt unseen, unworthy. I was terrified to show you real me, vulnerable me. I remember thinking that to be a good spiritual guide I had to have my shit together and never show you my humanity.
So I hid it all. I played it cool. I felt so embarrassed by who I was and in my head always thought I was being “an asshole”. I tried to please others. I smiled a lot and made sure every room I was in felt comfortable. I gave my power away. I did things others wanted me to do. I didn’t breathe. I didn’t feel as deeply as I knew I really felt. I was too afraid to laugh loudly as I worried people would think I was weird. I was too afraid to slow down and take a sip of water while I was teaching for fear of taking up too much space. And I was too afraid to stop or let go of control because if I did I deeply feared no one would be there to catch me and my entire life would fall apart. Hiding my real self this much made me feel small, helpless, scared.
I deeply longed to feel an inner sense of security, no longer painfully shy and self conscious or awkward speaking up or setting boundaries. I wanted inner peace. I wanted so badly to take up space and just be at peace, loved and accepted as authentic messy amazing me. Deep love and acceptance for the totality of me so I tried to find it by controlling my outside world.
I tried every diet, supplement, protocol, healing you could think of. I’d go on road trips and bring a cooler of the limited food I could eat. I’d even bring that food into a restaurant and watch my boyfriend eat. I remember one birthday, a cake arriving at the table so I could blow out the candles and I hated that moment. I had to watch my friends eat my cake because in my own mind I couldn’t’ have it. I’d never hang out with friends. I was too scared to even go to the park. My life got really small. I felt helpless and powerless to ever be ‘ok’. I just wanted to be ‘ok’.
My pain and symptoms got so bad over the following years. Nothing I was trying was seeming to give me permanent relief. Slowly but surely my ‘laying on the bathroom floor in pain’ prayers were answered. I found 3 guides from different alternative backgrounds who taught me about how special and amazing and valuable I was just for being me. I went on a journey to discover that my light work mattered. That my voice mattered. That who I was just by being was valuable. I saw that my uniqueness was safe. I learned about all the wild, natural ways of life. Coming home to who I was naturally before socialization and trauma. I learned about what it is to be a woman. I learned about God and divinity and my spiritual gifts. I learned about miracles. The power I had to create. I learned how to let go of energy, heal my nervous system, rewire my brain. I learned how to love myself. I deeply learned to surrender my fears to God and learn to follow love. I had schooling in my inner voice. Finding my way back home with intuition and trusting my knowing to lead me to who I was and not what others said I should do or be. Along my journey through the many healing modalities I’ve studied…
I harmonized my life with Innate Divine Truth & Love. The innate ways my body and being thrived. Which is totally not the way our system teaches us things are. I became inner directed. I felt Safe, enough and powerful in God. By coming back home to what was real, natural, authentic within me I came back to life. I took my power back. I became balanced in my energies, loving myself and connected to Source. From this place I saw that Authentic me is the gift to the world and that my being just as much as my doing matters.
Day by day I found love within me. Strength within me. Healing powers within me. Higher levels of consciousness such as compassion, gentleness and acceptance within me. I learned about my boundaries, wants, needs, desires and my innate truth and I finally started to choose it before others needs. I learned about my magic and how cool it and I was. I healed my co-dependency. I honored myself and my true divine path. I learned I was worthy for being alive. I listened deeply for the voice of fear and began to choose differently. I spent my days rewiring my brain and nervous system and letting go of old pain. I spend my days meeting every ounce of my inner darkness with love. I found ME with all her gifts and beauty amidst what was passed down to me. I found new beliefs of truth hidden with me that I used as pillars of light to remind my body of who I really was. There were setbacks, bounce backs, so much time in between I wondered if God had abandoned me but I stayed devoted to my knowing that I was a light who came here to be in joy, ease and excellence.
My one coach kept telling how gifted I was and still lovable in my humanity too. I needed other unconditionally loving beings to see me before I could see myself. I finally gained my power back. When I started to get to know my inner landscape I’d set boundaries, I’d piss people off but finally they saw I wasn’t one to be messed with. I was devoted to me. To God’s view of me and not theirs. My vulnerability and tenderness became gifts not weaknesses. They led to what I wanted.
More than many I know, I was and still am deeply devoted to being the whole me, the totality of my joy, love and true self on this planet. That devotion kept me going. It was my life line. I’d get quiet and listen for the next step in trust and faith. And on the days I still had symptoms, I’d learn to adjust myself to what I needed. I was always terrified I’d piss friends off but I never did. They always understood and adjusted accordingly. I had to clear the shame of being “a sick person” and see that this was simply the wisdom of my body teaching me to stop living as a separate self and start living as an extension of my God Self. Here I could finally feel enough, safe, loved, cared for and supported as I had always longed for. Here my life could open up. I realized that to this day when I feel a normal human sensation or symptom that it’s love in disguise helping me see something I can’t see yet. Maybe there is wisdom, something more to love or something that needs shifting? Or I’m being called to a higher level of awareness. God doesn’t let you run with sissors.
One of my favorite quotes is Anais Nin’s, “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bug was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” This was huge for me. I knew it could hurt to stay in my pain, patterns and trauma. And I knew it would hurt to expand into authentic, god given me. But I knew which one I WANTED more. Authentic me. I knew the other wasn’t actually working. So I tended to the old one in pain. I prayed for my healing path to be laid out and I get massive courage to be messy, wrong, weird and try to find the successful, silly, loving, passionate, creative, entrepreneur, I knew was in me. And 8 years in, I could….
….see what I see now. That there is an innate flow to life, a current that is us flowing with life and when we fight against it we loose, when we trust in It we thrive. That ease is also an option. That our feelings are beautiful. That following joy and desires allows us to thrive. That we aren’t separate from the source that created us. And that when we listen within, we are guided to our heart’s deepest dicers because Love is good. That love of self can melt the sun. That we are powerful. And that when you find the real you, which will feel light and true. You as you are is medicine for the world.
I’m still human and in the next leg of my evolution, but now I have my life back. I have friends, real soul friends, beautiful clients, a six figure business that is soul directed. I’m supported. Things work out for me. I laugh like I did when I was a kid. Probably more. I’m free. I feel deeply and when it’s witnessed by my partner he calls me beautiful. My heart is open. I know my worth. I set boundaries. I speak my truth. Honor my needs. I have balance. I spend time in nature and life in flow. I slow down and trust God to provide and I follow. Things always show up for me. I live in magic and miracles. I feel worthy and enough. My life is filled with childlike aw and wonder and I have a beautiful connection to the Divine. I let go of the diets and supplements and listen to what is natural to me. I listen to my inner wisdom. I follow what feels light. I take my cues from within to thrive on the outside. I eat foods I never through were possible. And yes, now on my birthday as I blow out the candles, never again will I watch other’s eat my birthday cake, I smile inside as I see how far I’ve come, and I enjoy my very own piece.
**I’d love to assist you on your journey too. Check out www.jamiewozny.com for more details on how I can support you. I have ton’s of live group journeys, classes and on demand courses for a variety of needs. xx Jamie
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
Looking back, I think three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey were…
Learning about and activating…
-Self Love
-Balancing Your Masculine and Feminine Energies
-Connection to Source
What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
-Self Love – Use your awareness to notice, neutrally, where you are unkind to yourself in your own mind. What would younger you have needed to hear instead? Can you offer this to yourself?
-Balancing Your Masculine and Feminine Energies – Look up the qualities of each energy. With compassion, notice where you are out of balance. Pick one of the energies you feel out of balance with and start small. What is one practice you can add into your day to assist you in opening up to this innate part of yourself?
-Connection to Source – Practice with the use of intention and prayer. Proclaim out loud what you’d love, you’d desire. You can even write this down and start to see the Universe speak back in accordance to your requests or even begin to notice things that require healing so that you can begin to align with your request.
I also love prayer. Not from an unworthy place, but just as a dialogue between you and God to ask questions and get guidance. One I used today was, “What is my most pressing issue that is underlying all areas I may be stuck from my next level of expansion. About 10 mins later a quiet answer popped into my mind.
I have courses that assist with all three of these on www.jamiewozny.com too if you’d like to go deeper.
Before we go, maybe you can tell us a bit about your parents and what you feel was the most impactful thing they did for you?
My mother has always believed in me. She’s been my number one fan. She believed in me before I believed in myself. When I said I wanted to dance, she said yes. Play piano, ok. Move to Los Angeles, through her tears she helped me pack.I wanted to be an actress, she said yes. I changed to the healing world. She joins me live and listens in. Now she is an actual fan. Enjoying the work I bring through to the world. I think we all need someone to show us our value before we know it for ourselves.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.jamiewozny.com
- Instagram: @jamiewozny
- Facebook: Facebook.com/jamiewozny
- Linkedin: linkedin.com/in/jamie-wozny-9a3a12161
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC8YIlrpEIsnXCIFJLHCvSFg
Image Credits
