We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Jason Polk. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Jason below.
Hi Jason , we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?
Healthy self-esteem comes from within. It is not based on how well I do at my job, how much money I have, or who I’m in a relationship with.
Healthy self-esteem is our ability to hold ourselves in warm regard and provide esteem to ourselves.
The first place I’ve started with this is to identify when I am being critical of myself. When I’m beating myself for not having enough money, or maybe I made a bonehead mistake, I become aware of that, and then I use the question and mantra of, “Can I hold myself in warm regard despite my imperfections?”
That usually triggers a deep breath and a sense of calm – the practice of esteeming ourselves.
Remembering that we’re human and will make mistakes is a valuable practice. We’re not perfect.
When I practice this, I’m not added to the negative self-talk that’s so easy to do. When I’m being overly self-critical, that’s the opposite of confidence and healthy self-esteem.
When I screw up, I acknowledge it, use this practice, and apologize if necessary.
When we can practice esteeming ourselves to any degree, our world opens. We take things less personally and can experience our birthright as humans: joy and appreciation.
Do I always do this perfectly? No, and that’s OK.
Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
I’ve sucked at relationships. I’ve been overly selfish and addicted.
I’ve been divorced.
Now, I’m happily married and feel some comfort in my skin.
I want to help others feel that way. I want to help others have a healthy relationship and be seen and loved by their partner.
Now, I hope to spread effective couples therapy and healing from trauma to the Denver metro area and, ideally, across the country.
I’ve been a couples therapist for almost ten years.
My passion is growing a couples therapy-centered agency where I’m helping the next generation of couples therapists provide effective therapy and healing.
Our practice is growing and opening a new location in Lakewood, Colorado.
We hope to continue to grow and help others be happily married or partnered and comfortable in their skin!
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
I got a phrase from my father, a business owner. He often shared the term “Bonehead persistence.”
In running a business, that quality is most important. Problems arise and you sometimes question, “Why am I doing this?”
Bonehead persistence is knowing that quitting would be much worse than tackling the problem.
It’s the wisdom that the only way to resolve a problem is through the problem. Problems don’t get resolved trying to deny them or escape them.
This same wisdom works with internal/personal problems. The best way to resolve them is by looking at them, not running or trying to escape. By giving the issue compassionate awareness with the patience and understanding that nothing lasts forever.
If you knew you only had a decade of life left, how would you spend that decade?
Hiring the right people.
I’ve been hearing more about the concepts of who, not how. Hiring the right people is the best way to grow.
This is where I’m focusing my learning as I need more knowledge and experience.
I need to hire a couple of therapists for our expansion. Hopefully, when this is published, I’ll be on the right track!
Contact Info:
- Website: https://coloradorelationshiprecovery.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jason.a.polk/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/denverrelationshipexperts
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/corelationshiprecovery/
- Other: Podcast: https://healthyrelationshipsecretsforparents.buzzsprout.com
