We were lucky to catch up with Jen Handoko recently and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Jen , we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?
Just go ahead and be delusional. If you think to yourself “I’m the nicest, fiercest, hottest, smartest, funniest, most talented person on this planet” then you will start to believe it and then others will too. An air of confidence starts to stir around you and everyone will pick up on it. I’ve spent too much of my youth hating and doubting myself. It’s alright for me to acknowledge what I have to offer and be unapologetic about my confidence.
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
I write and publish my own books. I felt like it was necessary and cathartic for me to process my childhood and youth and publish it for other girls to read. My writing is a way for me to purge that trauma for good.
I implore every person to write one thing everyday. Intrusive thoughts, a haiku, whatever. Just keep pulling the rot from your chest. Anyway, I’m also a new mom. I have a horror novel that’s just brewing in the back of my head and I’m going to publish it one day, hopefully soon. I have yet to find a good horror novel that centers around post partum depression.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
My high school creative writing teacher, Mr. Simony, had us write really personal things and made us read it in front of the class. Imagine getting your heart broken by a guy in your class and you had to read a poem about him while he’s in the second row. Imagine telling your most intrusive thoughts in front of high schoolers. It made me fearless and open. It taught me not to feel weird about myself because there are others who feel the same. Art connects people.
For new writers, I would tell them to read more. You can’t write if you don’t read. Finding your inner voice and style is important. If you’re having writers block, it’s your inner self telling you to close the laptop and stop being hyperaware of everything. Stop and smell the roses first. Process things later. You can’t write beautiful things about life and the human experience if you’re not being present for it.
Okay, so before we go we always love to ask if you are looking for folks to partner or collaborate with?
I would love for my book, Girl Almighty, to become a film. I have yet to see a coming-of-age story of a girl who looks like me or have my same experience. I can see it being a very important thing for young immigrant girls to watch. The book is a beautiful, sad, hopeful, uncomfortable, important portrait of girlhood. I have this burning in my chest about it because I don’t just think it would be cool for it to be a movie, but necessary. I’d also love for readers of the book to see and feel exactly how I intended it to be. A24, please give me a job. Or anyone who is interested in collaborating and creating a cinematic masterpiece, let’s talk. Jennifer Coolidge could play my friend’s mom.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: www.instagram.com/jen.handoko
