We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Jen Patterson. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Jen below.
Jen, we’re thrilled to have you sharing your thoughts and lessons with our community. So, for folks who are at a stage in their life or career where they are trying to be more resilient, can you share where you get your resilience from?
On January 10, 2020, I gave birth to my second son, Forrest. A few hours after giving birth, I learned that due to a previously undetected birth defect, he was going to have a very short life. We brought him home, loved him fiercely, and in the early morning hours of January 19th, we said goodbye to him.
Forrest’s life and death were a very stark reminder that there are some things that we have no control over. Some events will just happen, and nothing we could have done would change the outcome. Knowing this can make you feel very small and make the world feel out of control.
But more importantly, loving and losing Forrest was a lesson that everything else — what we can control — is a choice. In very dark periods of grief, I had to choose to let my friends and family support me and let them in, I made the choice to seek counseling. And even though I felt extremely broken, I chose to find the joy and the good that was all around me. Grief is an ocean with a tide constantly pulling you back in from shore, and I had to make these decisions repeatedly. But, eventually, continuously choosing joy while living in that grief wasn’t as challenging.
This resilience in choosing a life I’m proud of sticks with me always. Building a one-woman business is full of high highs and very low lows, but sticking to a vision and knowing that I can choose to work hard, be creative, try new things, and always do my best is what motivates me to keep going.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
I’m a wedding photographer who did not love being a bride. The attention made me uncomfortable, and I got stuck trying to do things the way I thought I “should.”
What I didn’t consider (and deeply wish I had) is the concept of romanticizing your own life. Romanticizing a wedding doesn’t have to mean throwing the biggest party ever or being “ a traditional bride” – definitely not. However, it does mean unapologetically embracing and celebrating shared love, self-love, and community in a way that’s true to you.
That’s what drew me to wedding photography — creating images that don’t fit in a neat little box. It’s easy to get caught up in what you see on Pinterest, but your wedding is your wedding, so your photos shouldn’t look like anyone else’s.
Delighting my clients with chic, soulful, and surprising images brings me so much joy. I’m thrilled every time one of my couples is surprised my how much they love their photos — it’s a feeling that everyone deserves to have.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
1. Autonomy and agency. You don’t need permission from anyone to start. And while it’s helpful to always learn and keep an open mind, you don’t need anyone to understand or like what you’re doing for it to be worthy.
2. Self-starter. When you’re running your own business, you must become a jack of all trades because you’re the accountant, the marketer, the social media manager, the salesperson, etc. So don’t stop yourself just because you don’t know how to do something yet – we live in an age of endless, accessible resources, so if you need to learn how to do something, the information is available.
3. Get comfortable being uncomfortable. As a business owner, there are an endless number of “first times,” which can feel uncomfortable and trigger imposter syndrome. But you have to believe that wherever you are, that’s where you belong. You really do have to fake it until you feel it, but the best way to become someone is to behave like that person.
Awesome, really appreciate you opening up with us today and before we close maybe you can share a book recommendation with us. Has there been a book that’s been impactful in your growth and development?
The 3-6-9 Project and The Courage to be Disliked are two books that have had a big impact on my mindset as a business owner and in life in general. Though they take different approaches, both books focus on the idea that your mindset is your reality. And you have the power to create your reality.
We can be anyone we want to be — unless we think we can’t. And that’s a powerful concept to harness. If you want to walk into the room and be the most confident, well-spoken person in the room, then you have to believe it first. Both these books have taught me the power in the daily practice of visualization, journaling, and affirmations.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://jenpattersonphoto.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jenpattersonphoto/
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@JenPattersonPhoto
Image Credits
Jessika Christine Photo (personal image only)
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
