Meet Jill Dearman

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Jill Dearman. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Hi Jill, thank you for being such a positive, uplifting person. We’ve noticed that so many of the successful folks we’ve had the good fortune of connecting with have high levels of optimism and so we’d love to hear about your optimism and where you think it comes from.

I think optimism and confidence have always been closely linked for me. When I was in high school I was in the theater program. Our group included all performers and one writer: me. So I thought, why not write the school play? It was incredible to have a dream and then imagine it into reality. Similarly, in college I thought it would be fun to DJ, as I’d always been obsessed with music. My friend’s brother knew about stereo equipment and I used my student loan refund to buy turntables he recommended. I already had a ton of vinyl and asked my buddy up at school to show me how to mix. Next thing you know I was DJing on campus every Wednesday and Friday night. I was into astrology from a young age, and had been practicing doing chart readings on friends and family for many years. My roommate was editor of the school paper and asked me if I wanted to write a horoscope, so I did. I think it wasn’t until years later that I realized this “anything is possible” attitude was unusual. I had a lot of friends who were freelance writers like me, but I was lucky enough to have steady and lucrative work writing monthly and weekly astrology columns for magazines. Throughout my life when I’ve seen a niche for myself based on doing something I love, I’ve just gone for it. As a writer, over the years that has also included tons of rejection. But the successes make it all worthwhile, and I always feel like I am lucky to be doing what I love. I think optimism is a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you can imagine yourself in a particular identity and suspend disbelief, you can make your vision come true in reality.

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?

My whole life I’ve been a mix of writer and healer. I am the author of seven books, a writing professor at NYU, an editor and a professional astrologer. When I was coming of age during the AIDS crisis I worked as an HIV counselor, while writing plays. My career as an author began in 1999 with two books, Queer Astrology for Men and Queer Astrology for Women (both from St. Martins). I have also written a book based on my experience as a writing coach called Bang the Keys: Four Steps to a Lifelong Writing Practice (Penguin). After having several novels published, most notably Jazzed (Vine Leaves Press), which was chosen as one of the top Indie Historical Fiction books of 2022 by Kirkus, I have done what these days is called a pivot in my career. I’ve returned to my roots as an astrologer. I feel like I have a special talent for translating the language of the stars, and over the years I have continued to study metaphysical work, so given the chaotic state of the world, I want to turn back to serving people. In that spirit, I am doing several astrology-related projects which I hope will help people use this ancient wisdom in a fresh, fun, practical way that will help them create the lives they want. My next astrology book is in process, and I write a weekly column for Substack called Jill Dearman Astrology Lessons, along with regular horoscopes for Reader’s Digest. I have also just launched a service called Astrology-Based Counseling (ABC). ABC threads together my background as an astrologer, a counselor, and a coach. I came up with these eight questions below to help potential clients assess whether I have what they are looking for.

How to know if ABC is right for you:

1. Are you at a crossroads, and not sure which way to turn?

2. Have you tried different kinds of guidance from experts, but haven’t been able to significantly move the needle in your life?

3. Does the volatile, unpredictable state of the world put you in a frequent state of anxiety, darkness, or overwhelm?

4. Do you wish to be truly listened to, and experience a relaxing peaceful form of counseling?

5. Would you like to tap into your most authentic self and make decisions based on belief in yourself, instead of fear of failure or being judged?

6. Do you sense that this is a unique moment on earth, and a unique moment for you to try something new and take a chance on totally transforming your life for the better?

7. Do you sense that establishing a baseline peace of mind, and manifesting your goals and desires will lead you to truly making positive changes in the world?

8. Would you take a leap of faith if you knew you could work with someone whom you could trust, with a unique skill-set and vision, who would make the process fun and inspiring, and leave you with the tools to continue to grow on your own?

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

1) Identify your Definite Chief Aim (DCA). I wrote a column about it for Substack which provides step by step guidance.
2) Develop a practice. Growing up, I didn’t even know how to do homework properly. But when I was in my 20s and working a job I felt trapped in, I developed a habit which turned out to be priceless. After work, I would make dinner, clean up and then write for three hours. What I wrote at the time didn’t take off but developing that discipline muscle was everything. It didn’t take long for me to able to leave that job and work as a freelance writer. I provide in depth guidance on how to develop a writing practice in my book Bang the Keys. You don’t have to be a professional writer to get something useful out of it.
3) Take Rejection in Stride. My favorite author, Patricia Highsmith once wrote that she allows herself 48 hours to basically feel lousy over a rejection. Then she moves on. I’m extremely emotional, but somehow I have learned to not take rejection personally – because it’s not personal! It really is a numbers game. Whether you are trying to get published, get financing for your start-up …it’s all about moving forward and not looking back. The truth is no one is thinking about you. If you get turned down for something, please believe the folks who rejected you aren’t laughing behind your back. Chances are they are super busy with their businesses, with their kid who is home with the flu, with a pipe that busted in their kitchen, and a million other things. Learn to feel your feelings and move on. Keep your eye on the prize and you will soon obtain it.

Who is your ideal client or what sort of characteristics would make someone an ideal client for you?

My ideal client is someone who has gotten really sick of going around in circles, without “cracking the code” of making their dreams come true. This person is open to creative approaches to self-growth, and is eager to develop new habits that will help them seal the deal and stick the landing!

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