We recently connected with Jillian Fuleky and have shared our conversation below.
Jillian , we’re thrilled to have you sharing your thoughts and lessons with our community. So, for folks who are at a stage in their life or career where they are trying to be more resilient, can you share where you get your resilience from?
I come from a lifetime of trauma. Plenty of bad things have happened to me- but i think one of the things that has helped build me resilience was growing up in Super unhealthy family dynamics.. i am the youngest of 3, and my siblings are 7 and 11 years older than me. i always felt like i wasnt really apart of my own family. We were raised in our own parents generational trauma.
My mom would credit my brothers physical and emotional abuse to ‘sibling rivalry’. But is there really any competition when your sibling is 7 years older than you? He would beat the piss out of me, up until the age of 20. He molested me when i was super young. My mom had later told me that my brother hated me because i was born after him. Because of the lack of validation of getting abused my whole growing up life, my mom and my relationship has always been pretty rocky. But Im grateful, because i have a full cup of resilience.
I never felt validated for living in fear as a child. I always felt very criticized by my own family.
I wanted my brother to be kind to me so bad, i would do things to go out of my way to kiss his ass, write papers in elementary school explaining all the things i liked about him.
The abuse still continues. At least its not physical anymore. But still at every family gathering, My brother brings up some thing i did as an adolescent to put me down and embarrass me if front of whatever company we had. Nobody but my dad would stick up for me.
When all the physical abuse was done, it just got swept under the rug, like most traumatic things that would happen in my family!
Its taken a lot of therapy and a lot of love from other people to not feel like such a victim or the black sheep of my family. But everyday, with every space, i feel like im healing.
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
Im a massage therapist. I help peoples posture and pain. I think after a lifetime of physical abuse, i just really want to help and heal people physically.
I teach a weekly yoga class on saturdays in ann arbor, again, with the idea of trying to help people in physical pain.
I have started making boho hippie earrings! And thats fun
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Trusting myself on my journey was the best thing i could do. We all have a ‘plan’- But when paths/ doors
Open up on those paths. Check em out.
Dont listen to people who have never played in the area you’re in.
Okay, so before we go, is there anyone you’d like to shoutout for the role they’ve played in helping you develop the essential skills or overcome challenges along the way?
My dear friend Jen! She has been a mom a sister, a mentor, inspiration.
She basically taught me to be me, by being so inspired by her. Her heart is big and her dance moves are bigger. I dont know what id do without her.
Contact Info:
- Website: Jamhandsbodywork.com
- Instagram: Jamhandsbodywork
- Facebook: Jamhands bodywork
- Linkedin: Jill fuleky
Image Credits
Scott haber Christie
