We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Joseph Gandurski a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Joseph Gandurski a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Joseph , so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.
My answer to this query also incorporates several other suggested topics, such as, work ethic, “imposter syndrome,” resilience, persistence, and positive outlook. As a kid, I remember naturally being happy-go-lucky, but developed deep fear when faced with new challenges, or when confronted by something I felt might harm me. I remember around second grade developing an overwhelming fear of death after an inconsiderate nun explained how mortal we are and we would all someday die.
Little by little, I became less fearful of things and more confident. Having a great group of friends through grammar school definitely helped. We supported each other through our teen angst years, and the fact that we all were involved in sports and fitness boosted our self-confidence. We played outside almost every day, baseball with nailed together bats, taped up baseballs and old gloves, but we never felt deprived.
All this led to a general sense of self-confidence, even in the face of school difficulties or poor family relationships. There were some of my friends who suffered abusive family situations. But we were “the guys,” from 43rd and Honore. All through grammar and high school we supported each other in trying to sort out feelings and connections to the opposite sex and many of us “crashed and burned,” but we made it through with each other’s help. We had a bond that remains today. So one key to developing self-confidence and self-esteem is to develop positive supportive, lasting relationships.
After high school many of us joined the service as the Vietnam War ramped up. For me, my three years of service beginning at age 17 in basic training was a game changer for self-confidence. When I finished basic training, I was like a piece of hardened steel ready to take on any challenge and win any battle. I remember going through an infiltration course with live fire over our heads as we crawled through and explosives going off and I actually crawled to where I knew the explosive charges were because it was cool when they went off and the blast lifted you off the ground. Those three years were the most formative and maturing years for me. I went from a trainee to a skilled soldier in my military specialty and survived some scary times in Vietnam. I became a respected and recognized interrogator and finished my service teaching interrogation at Fort Bragg. I was 20 years old. There was nothing I couldn’t do. Another key to developing self -esteem is to gain experience in situations where the stakes are high.
I returned to Chicago anxious to start my adult life, have a family, and get a job. I married my sweetheart, Maggie. I was 21. I kind of drifted from job to job. They seemed boring and uninspiring. Then I took the test for the Chicago Police Department and after spending a while in a dead-end job, I was called to the force in 1972. Wow, life-changing.
I was very apprehensive when I hit the street. You never wanted to make a mistake that would get you or your partner injured or even a civilian injured or killed. It was a steep learning curve. It took several years from being a rookie to becoming a seasoned officer. Getting a good partner and being on a good “watch” with other like-minded officers was key. I went from an “observer” to seasoned trusted officer after working in several “fast” areas.
I had a shot at a truly unique assignment on the Mounted Patrol. I really didn’t know much about horses and there was a large attrition rate. Training was as tough as any I ever encountered. I was now 30 years old. I persevered and worked very hard and ultimately made it through. Again, it was a major change from the first day where I thought the horse would kill me, to becoming a skilled horseman able to meet any riding challenge, which there were plenty in the big city. After two years I was called to become a detective. The stakes were upped significantly.
I was assigned to violent crimes. Being a violent crime detective brought with it heavy responsibility. You dealt with murderers, rapists, career criminals. We were faced with apprehending individuals who created the carnage we see in our urban cities. You had a chance to speak for the murdered victims and build a case within an ethical framework of the law. The rewards were that you had a sense of giving victims who were marginalized in society a measure of justice they would normally not experience. Talk about “imposter syndrome.” Putting homicide cases together took a lot of skill, most importantly working with other detectives, and working with other units to identify possible suspects and witnesses, identifying evidence, then putting it all together, sometimes over months or years. Sometimes the cases fell apart. At first, I had doubts as to whether I was good enough, but working with the right individuals, getting experience, and solving several tough cases developed a sense of confidence that I belonged. So another key to self-confidence is successfully networking with others and handling increased responsibility to achieve success.
I always considered what I needed to do to be successful. It involved focusing upon a goal, crafting a plan, involved hard work, a willingness to learn, a commitment to be the best, networking with other successful individuals who were willing to share their expertise and then taking the lead when the opportunities presented themselves to make an impact.
On and on it went through my life. From fighting against the odds to get promoted, to broadening my knowledge base and experiences and building a reputation for competence and reliability. So another key to self-confidence is building a reputation for competence and reliability over a broad spectrum.
Ultimately, I transitioned from a student to mentor and leader. Also important was acknowledging the hard work of those around me, as well as the support of my wife, understanding that all these individuals have their own needs and hopes and goals. I ended up in the upper echelons of the department and I retired after serving as Deputy Chief of Detectives and Organized Crime. The satisfaction was in the journey and in surmounting many challenges. It was my honor to serve for 31 years with some of the greatest human beings on this earth. Many of those friendships remain. Another key to self confidence and self-esteem is to build a history of positive accomplishments and acknowledge those who helped you attain them and to act in a worthy cause.
After I retired from the police department, I decided to pursue an interest in acting. I took acting classes and auditioned for a few local suburban theatre productions and I was fortunate enough to land a role in “A Few Good Men,” an excellent production in a suburban theatre. I did a few more plays and then had an opportunity to do nice roles in two or three Indie feature films. These plays and films were challenging but I learned a lot. Not only about acting but also about the entertainment business. It was valuable experience. I then had the opportunity to be represented by a management agency in LA, led by Sharon Holleran, and over the next five or so years, I made short forays out there, landing roles on “Criminal Minds,” and in the film “Chavez.” I could only stay out there for a limited time because of family obligations here. My mom was very ill and my dad had passed away. But it was an adventure and I continued to learn. I took several classes, workshops and networked.
I returned to Chicago with the hopes of landing some roles with the opportunities here. However, several things affected the possibilities, the pandemic and the sea changes in the industry brought about by social and economic upheaval, were major. So I continue to take classes, hone my craft, and network, but the press of time was heavy and opportunities were more limited.
Don’t be afraid to set your sights on what seems to be an unattainable goal. Then study, plan, network and persevere. Accept that even if circumstances conspire to stop you from reaching the ultimate goal, you can still achieve a sense of satisfaction in the journey. Enjoy the “small” victories because they really aren’t small. They are woven into the fabric of your life story.
As I continued my acting endeavors, I also had opportunities through a veteran’s organization, Veterans in Media and Entertainment, led by Karen Kraft, where I learned about screenwriting and the business of production, and I began to write. I truly appreciate those opportunities that made me a better writer. I have since written four screenplays and have extended them into two novels. I also produced an award-winning short film with the help of a brilliant director, Mary Reynard, titled “RPG” that focuses on the ripple effects of loss due to war.
Also recently, I have partnered with David Kupcinet, a producer focused on creating non-scripted television shows and many of them hold the promise of production. Another key to self-confidence and self-esteem is to be flexible and widen your focus. When some doors close, open others.
So it has been and continues to be a great ride. I think the key to life is to continuously explore different possibilities, gather information and experience and keep moving forward. The process throughout my life is pretty similar, whether it be joining the military and being assigned to Military Intelligence, becoming a skilled horseman, being a cop and rising to the upper echelon of the department, or becoming an actor and writer. You have to look for opportunities to break in and grab them. You don’t become a director by walking onto a film set and announcing that you are one. You need to work your way onto a film set first—do student films, become a production assistant so you can learn the language of filmmaking. You need to study the craft, then network, and through hard work you prove your worth and get “street cred” in that field. Listen, observe, be helpful and be a team player. There could be two people up for the same role. Both are equally competent, and I guarantee you the one who will get the job is the one who everyone enjoys having on the set- competent, flexible, prompt, helpful, a little humble. Producing a play or a film is an agony of chaos and tremendously hard work for many weeks, all in close quarters. It is so much easier for everyone to work together towards a common goal than have to work through problem personalities due to diva behavior, drama creators, incompetence, or selfishness. Become the type of person everyone can rely upon to help them prosper, be creative, and reach a common goal.
So in summary, the key to building self-confidence is to develop a plan. Identify those traits that need shoring up, be bold but not aggressive. Take chances and “reasonable risks.” Study and network and look for opportunities to gain experience, and work hard to gain credibility. Probably the most important thing is to understand that people are the same whether they are police chiefs or heads of studios. They all have their strengths and weaknesses, their fears, and anxieties, just like you do. Fear no one. Position yourself through experience, competence, personality, and reputation to be able to help them reach their goals and you will undoubtedly reach yours.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
Thanks for the opportunity to write a bit about myself. First off, I am nothing without my loved ones. My parents (both deceased) and brother and sister provided love and support throughout my young life, shaping me into a person with appreciation of family as well as extended family and friends. I am part Sicilian and part Polish and deeply appreciate the values instilled in me from living in those cultures. I learned the values of family, hard work, mutual support, developing a strong faith, and an appreciation of the history of those cultures.
I grew up in a poor working class near the Chicago Stock Yards. Our fathers worked hard in factories under tough conditions to provide us with a Catholic education. It was a self-contained community, parishes provided faith based social services, there were local “ma and pa” stores with simple limes of credit. I lived in a cold water flat and the nearby park provided showers. I never felt deprived and I had a terrific bunch of peers that provided mutual support.
When I graduated High School, the Vietnam war was ramping up so like many of my friends, I joined the service–the Army, where I was trained as an interrogator to include Vietnamese language school, then sent to Vietnam where I landed a spot in a small, combined interrogation team in the Mekong Delta and worked with several units all throughout the delta. I experience the notorious Tet offensive of 1968 and was able to provide initial intelligence regarding the attacks in the delta areas, especially Can Tho where I was based. It was a crazy chaotic time but I made it through and was awarded the Joint Service Commendation Medal. I finished my service at Fort Bragg where I was an instructor in interrogation.
In 1970, I married my wonderful wife Margaret and though we struggled to have kids for a decade we were blessed with my son Matt, and almost ten years later, my daughter Lauren arrived. I cannot imagine my life without them. They both are free and deep thinkers, super smart and talented. I also have been blessed with two grandchildren, Bennie, 6 and Ellie, 4 and they have enriched my senior years immeasurably.
In 1972 I joined the Chicago Police Department wary of the Department’s reputation, but I came to understand the difficult, dangerous, and unappreciated world of police officers. I had a wealth of assignments, patrol, detective, hostage negotiator, mounted patrol and gradually made my way through the ranks to command level where I retired after 31 years as Deputy Chief of Organized Crime. Being a police officer ended up being my true calling in life and I have a deep appreciation and love for those who sacrifice so many things to serve their communities.
I also and attained a Master’s Degree in Education and am a Licensed Professional Counselor and a consultant.
With a love of the creative side of life I have taken many acting and writing workshops and have written a novelette (Amazon) about the courage of “The Women of Fort Dearborn” and produced wrote and performed an award-winning short film, “RPG” that focuses on the ripple effects of loss due to war. Continuing my creative side, I have written four feature screenplays and two novels and of course would love to obtain funding to bring them to the big screen. I love art and love to work with creatives, especially young people.
My days are spent writing and enjoying my grandkids, I recently offered a free screenwriting class to police officers to help relieve stress, and I am on the board of “Rising Star Ranch,” a charitable organization that provides equine experiences to first responders. I hope to be active in the creative arts for the rest of my life.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
The first and most significant quality and skill for folks to develop early in their journeys is the ability to have “strategic vision.” For me it has been extremely beneficial during my life. Strategic vision is the ability to thoroughly assess any given plan, proposal, or course of action and its impact in not only the near term, but the long term as well. For instance, you get a job offer with another company, better pay. The wheels in my brain immediately churn through the positives and negatives, Is the company viable in the long run? What about benefits? Travel considerations? What is the human environment like there? Mission statement? Management philosophy? What is my future with my current company for the next six months, years? Does the grass just look greener? How will my life and the lives of my family be impacted in the long and short term. What about the new facility–amenities, parking, childcare? Who will be my direct supervisor, his/her history? What are my options if it doesn’t work out?
Proposal–let’s change the corporate fleet to a different manufacturer with all electric vehicles. What are the near and long term costs? Do we have a contract with the current providers regarding maintenance, provision of service and parts? What is the cost of training our drivers? Consider the cost of training mechanic and electric technicians to service the new fleet? Do we buy or lease? Do we have a charging network available, or must we use a commercial one where our vehicles may need to wait to charge up and what are the charging times? What are the benefits relative to fuel saving? Benefit to the environment? Publicity benefit? Insurance considerations?
This strategic vision ability is not a negative or nay-saying trait. It allows one to thoroughly and deeply assess a course of action to consider the “real” and far-reaching impact of a course of action before jumping in “half-cocked.”
The second important quality or skill is to understand that as a human being you have inherent value and that no person, no matter their position or status is worth more as an individual. Of course, we all recognize those who are “significant others,” those who can help us or hurt us-bosses, a casting director, a parent, a landlord. Yet their status or position doesn’t relegate us to having a lesser value. It is to our great benefit to understand that we deserve to be treated with dignity and respect. We don’t need to take a lesser seat to anyone. It can help to understand that power is transitory, a dictator with absolute power today may stand on the gallows tomorrow. The key is to treat everyone with respect, but to be confident in ourselves, assertive, not aggressive, in conveying our wants and needs, and mindful of the needs of others. Learn to fear no one.
The third trait is to do constant assessments of ourselves as human entities. Like a vehicle with a soul, we have physical, mental, and spiritual needs. It’s easier to meet our goals when we are healthy in body, mind, and spirit. Problems in any of those areas will weigh us down, consciously, or subconsciously, and impact our ability to be able to be of good service to not only ourselves, but also to others who rely upon us. Just like a car, we as humans have definite symptoms when things aren’t “hitting on all cylinders,” we feel pain, we feel tired, exhausted, cannot sleep, moody. These are symptoms of possible problems that need to be addressed. The tremendous amount of stress we experience in our society assaults us constantly on every front. So we need to be aware of what we allow in, not only physically, but mentally. A “cure” or faddish potion that may seem to be an answer to our angst, may only increase it long term and create more problems. It all becomes a vicious cycle, we feel bad, we act badly. We act badly, we hurt our relations and ability to feel good about ourselves. We experience more emotional and physical pain.
We need to constantly and frankly assess where we are on several fronts. We need to check those behaviors that damage us and hurt others. we need to strive to do what it takes to be better friends, spouses, bosses, employees, and human beings in general.
What is the number one obstacle or challenge you are currently facing and what are you doing to try to resolve or overcome this challenge?
The number one “obstacle” I am facing is one we all eventually face– aging and its consequences. I recently chuckled at a meme on Facebook. It said, “You can be anything you want to be… unless you want to be younger…then you’re screwed!
There is absolutely nothing wrong with the aging process. It is a natural part of life. It serves us best to accept it. Our years have given us wisdom and experience. However, there are considerable consequences to deal with. One of the most are the natural health issues that accompany aging. Physically one’s body systems can’t perform as well as when one is young. You are slower, ache more, not as cognitively sharp, more susceptible to serious illnesses, and face the fact that some aspects of our society close doors to you, consider you “obsolete” and irrelevant. You are more susceptible to illness–solution, you exercise, eat better, stay mentally active. You can become socially isolated– solution, you expand your network, volunteer more, stay close to and cherish your friends. As an actor there are fewer roles available. Solution–create your own content, you write more.
To me though aging has it’s challenges it is an honor denied to many. I feel blessed for everything I have and am committed to stay strong and relevant, physically, mentally, and spiritually and to do memorable and meaningful things.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://jmountie1.wixsite.com/joegandurski
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/joeygman1/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Mountie1
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/joegandurski/
- Youtube: Joe Gandurski@joegandurski3062
- Other: Acting reel: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bsSxP25JjNk&t=5s Detective sizzle: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cs1RpZ0nNdM Article: https://www.chicagotribune.com/suburbs/daily-southtown/ct-sta-vickroy-gandurski-film-st-0724-20170721-story.html Article:https://www.beverlyreview.net/news/community_news/article_07fcf884-d884-11ed-9a69-c7926377c622.html
