Meet Jude Leighton

We recently connected with Jude Leighton and have shared our conversation below.

Jude, we’re thrilled to have you sharing your thoughts and lessons with our community. So, for folks who are at a stage in their life or career where they are trying to be more resilient, can you share where you get your resilience from?
Resilience is gained from facing and overcoming diversity. I believe this applies to all of us as human beings. I’ve faced a lot of diversity in my 42 years. Most of which have been swept under a carpet, until recent years whilst working intensively with an experienced psychologist.

I have C-PTSD as a result og childhood sexual abuse. At an early age I learned to get up and carry on each day, despite just wishing to hide away – something that just wasn’t an option at the time. In retrospect, many of the coping strategies that I gained in order to survive at the time are no longer helpful – quite the opposite – they have become a hindrance. Working with myself to overcome those hindrances alone has helped me to gain resilience.

In recent years, after being diagnosed with PTSD, I have been told numerous times by medical professionals that I am unable to work and that there are things that I won’t be able to do anymore. These are people who don’t know me personally, and who refuse to see the things I have already achieved. I cannot deny that it is frustrating, but I am undeniably stubborn – one of the most powerful and useful traits that I have gained over the years.

Fortunately, I have been able to achieve many things in my life; love, friendship, education, and work. Each of which has required resilience to obtain and withhold.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
I have a day job working in IT, but outside of my 9-5 I’m a jazz saxophonist, and also volunteer as a mental health advocate.

Music is, without a doubt, an emotional outlet for me. A few years back I decided to record and release some tunes that I’d written in order to gain money from streams, which I donate to various charities. At the time, I had no expectations or ambitions, but I have discovered that there are actually people out there who enjoy listening to the music I make! It’s a confidence boost, for sure. I like the idea of something that I love doing so much being of gain to people less fortunate than myself.

I play tenor and alto saxophones and I have always been captivated and influenced by the warm tones of the likes of Ben Webster, Zoot Sims, Dexter Gordon, and Paul Desmond. This is the sound that grabs my heart and that I truly can express myself through. So far, I have release five singles, four of which are my own compositions.

Combining music and mental health advocacy is extremely meaningful for me. That’s why I use my social media platforms, not only to share musical performances, but also to share elements about my own mental health. The reason I do this is because I strongly believe that there is a desperate need for transparency regarding mental health issues. There is an immense amount of stigma surrounding the subject, which directly intensifies the feeling of shame that so many people who are suffering undergo.

Sharing both achievements and difficulties is my way of expressing to others that I’m just human, that we all have ups and downs in one way or another, and that life isn’t always a bed of roses. Hopefully this can inspire others to speak out and be transparent about their feelings. It doesn’t have to be filled with detail and negativity – an exclamation about my state of mind is often enough to bring something relatable and comforting to others in a similar situation.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Perseverance, kindness, and transparency are the three qualities that have been the most impactful on my journey. When things hit hard, don’t give up. Try to find a different perspective to analyse your situation from and see if there is another way forward.

One of the most important things that my psychologist has taught me, is that I can decide how I react – I can’t change other people or situations, but I can choose how I react to them. It sounds so simple, but people often say things like “that’s just the way it is!”, but forget to follow it up with, “but you can choose how you react to it”. I think about this often and, instead of feeling like I’m stuck in a rut, I find freedom in my choice of actions.

Being kind to others is important to me, and I am still learning to be kind to myself. But the motto ‘always treat other people as you wish to be treated’ is deeply ingrained in me. I make mistakes sometimes – we all do – but I believe that we can come far in life by spreading kindness and understanding. Those who have listened to me, supported me, and loved me with their kindness are those who have impacted me the most and helped me greatly in my journey to where I am today.

Transparency is something that has given me great strength over recent years. The ability so say it like it is, regarding mental health and my life in general, has given me freedom, strength, and most all hope. Sharing our experiences, worries, concerns , etc., can be truly liberating.

Is there a particular challenge you are currently facing?
Although I have come far in my journey, I’m still trying to gain confidence and believe in myself. My lack of confidence and inability to always trust my own judgement is something that holds me back. “Am I good enough?”, “Am I a bad person?”, “I’m not like them!”, are some of the negative questions/statements that run through my head daily.

My mind knows the truth, but sometimes my heart lies to me as a result of the trauma that I have in my baggage. So, my biggest hurdle right now it to truly believe in myself, stop judging and comparing myself, and trust in the truth that I know, but find so difficult to implement.

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