Meet K.T. Jay

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to K.T. Jay. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

K.T., so great to be with you and I think a lot of folks are going to benefit from hearing your story and lessons and wisdom. Imposter Syndrome is something that we know how words to describe, but it’s something that has held people back forever and so we’re really interested to hear about your story and how you overcame imposter syndrome.

Overcoming imposter syndrome is something that as an author, I’ve had to do time and time again. I don’t know that it’s a one time battle, but rather one I have to keep fighting.

Early on in the drafting process of my novel, my imposter syndrome was constant and very loud. The voice inside my head that told me I didn’t have anything important to contribute to the book would often ring louder than any other voice. It was enough to keep me from writing for days at a time. If I didn’t have anything new under the sun to share, then why should I be writing? Was there really room for my book in the world? Did it matter?

I’m a frequent Google-er as I’m sure many people in our day and age are. After searching for an answer to quiet the imposter syndrome voice in my head, I came to a couple of realizations.

One, that the voice inside my head that told me I wasn’t good enough and didn’t have anything important to say was a lie. A straight out lie. The power of that realization helped me dismantle the negative self-talk I’d let myself fall into. Two, I realized that every single author out there struggles with or has struggled with imposter syndrome. There comes a point in writing the manuscript where it’s common for writers to consider chucking everything out the window because of imposter syndrome. This happened many times for me. Knowing that I wasn’t alone in feeling like an imposter helped me gather the resources to battle it.

One of the tactics I tried was sharing some of my writing with a close trusted friend. I needed someone to tell me that my writing wasn’t absolute garbage. I shared some scenes I’d written with my husband and sisters who told me my writing was in fact, not garbage. For me, hearing that from someone else helped break down my imposter syndrome.

After taking the leap to share my writing with others, I then joined a writing group where we share our writing pieces each time we meet. During our meeting time, we have a prompt, write for twenty minutes on the prompt, then share what we created with the group. It’s a group with intentionally positive feedback, especially because we only had twenty minutes to write and no one writes a masterpiece in so little time. Each opportunity I took to share my writing has grown my confidence more and more. The first few times were terrifying. Even now, the initial moments of sharing, my heart still beats fast with nervousness. But when I do share, it’s another drop in the bucket towards growing my confidence and overcoming imposter syndrome. Having a safe place to share has really encouraged me to keep writing and realize the value in what I have to say.

The part of imposter syndrome that told me that I had nothing new to say was quite strong and I still needed to tackle that lie. Someone told me that yes, maybe nothing is truly new under the sun, but each individual has their own life experiences and perspectives. Therefore, the spin I put on something is unique to me and people need to hear my perspective. We never know how the way we present ideas could impact other people’s lives.

For me, overcoming imposter syndrome was and is a perspective shift. Instead of focusing on my fears, I need to focus on the ways I can impact people. I realized that I have the desire to write and create for a reason. My worldview could help someone else, and by not sharing my writing, I could be preventing that. Having a positive impact on people around me is important to me. It fuels my desire to write. Focusing on that helps me move forward and keep creating.

In addition to challenging my negative thoughts, focusing on what I’ve accomplished thus far also helps me. It’s easy to be frustrated that I’m not where I think I should be, but when I take a moment to look back and see all I’ve done, I’m proud of the work I’ve put in.

As I mentioned before, I think overcoming imposter syndrome is a constant battle. By arming myself with my purpose, a supportive community, and focusing on my accomplishments, I fight against it every day.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

I’m a YA Fantasy author, mom, and a Southern California native. I write about hard things cloaked in magic to help people feel less alone. Writing has always been in my life one way or another. It’s truly an honor and privilege that I get to write and run my author business in my spare time ie. when my sweet baby boy is napping!

One of the most exciting parts of what I do is probably the fact that I get to create worlds, people, and adventure from nothing. It’s a lot of fun to brainstorm ideas and outline where I want my story to go. I love doing research for a story before I write it. Research has always excited me. I love learning new things. When outlining a story, I enjoy asking the questions “what if” to help me figure out where I want the story and my characters to go.

On the more logistical side, I do enjoy the business aspects of being an author as well. From planning newsletters, working with my book cover designer, writing blogs for my website, interacting with people on instagram, I like getting to use the logistical side of my brain when my creative brain needs a little break.

When I’m not writing, I enjoy spending time with my husband and my sweet baby boy, going on walks, drinking tea, reading (of course), watching movies, and traveling. I’m always looking for new experiences to ignite my creativity!

My debut novel will be coming out in a few months and I’m ecstatic! I’ve been working on it from idea to edits since 2020. I’m excited to get this book into the world and in people’s hands. If you’d like to stay up to date on the book launch, sign up for my newsletter and follow me on Instagram. Let’s adventure together!

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

When I think about the three most important skills, or areas of knowledge that have been most impactful on my journey to become an author, I think storytelling, long term goal setting, and tenacity have been three that stand out.

Understandably, knowing how to tell a story is crucial in becoming an author. Stories have been part of my life since a young age, so I had an instinct around storytelling. Because I have consumed thousands of stories, my subconscious has learned how to best tell a story. As I started pursing being an author more seriously, I studied more in depth what makes a story compelling. Some important elements of story are, relatable characters, theme, riveting plot, setting, and story beats to name a few. After breaking down the parts of a story, I could see more clearly if my story lacked in certain areas. Learning the building blocks of story has helped me write one that connects with people.

Looking back, I’ve come to realize how important long term goal setting is in an author career. Writing a book is a long process and often takes a year or more. Therefore, having a solid long term plan is really important. Often times, I’ll have different parts of my project happening at the same time. For example, I’m in the final editing phase of my novel, and also working with a cover designer to finalize my cover. At the same time, I’m organizing advanced readers for my book launch. Planning these different parts of my book launch is crucial. To do this, I need to have a long term goal and schedule out tasks weeks, even months in advance. Thankfully, I’ve had time to hone my planning skills over the years, and it helps that I enjoy logistics.

Lastly, tenacity is another important quality one needs to have in being an author. On a surface level, I knew it was hard to write and publish a book, but I didn’t know it would be this hard. Many times throughout the process of writing and publishing, I wanted to quit. I’ve questioned if I’m really cut out to be an author. Time and time again, people around me have encouraged me and not let me give up. My husband most of all. He sees me at my wits end, and is the one who is there when I want to throw everything out the window. Thankfully, he encourages me every step of the way. Writing is a solitary activity, and very mental. Persevering through the doubt, bumps in the road, and failures is so important and it’s what’s going to get me to the finish line.

For anyone who wants to be an author or is starting out on their journey, I would encourage you to keep going! Keep at it. If I can do it, so can you. To build your storytelling skill, read books. Lots of them! Good books. I suppose reading not as good books can help as well because you learn what not to do when telling a story. Picking up a writing craft book about storytelling will also help give you the foundational knowledge you need to get started. Getting started is one of the hardest parts. It’s easy to build things up in our head, but the only thing that’s going to get words on the page and a book into the world is starting. Just sit down to write and having fun with it. Reading books, blog posts, and listening to podcasts about long term goal setting for your author business really helped me learn how to have a successful author mindset and plan effectively. Joanna Penn has a plethora of resources for anyone who’d like to learn how to build a successful author business, and hone in on long term goal setting. In all of this learning, I think tenacity will be developed. Keep showing up, keep going, even when you feel like giving up. Success is just on the other side of your frustration. Don’t give up! You have a story in your heart for a reason. You can do this!

Is there a particular challenge you are currently facing?

One of the biggest challenges I’ve been facing lately is also one of the biggest blessings in my life: becoming a mom. I have a nine month old baby boy. He brings so much joy to my husband and I’s lives. I wouldn’t trade him for the world. Becoming a mom has been the hardest and most rewarding experiences of my life.

Having a baby and being a full-time mom have taken more of my time and energy than expected, so my book isn’t where I thought it would be. Balancing postpartum life and book publishing has proven challenging. I’m learning to give myself grace in this postpartum season. It’s hard letting go of my expectations and plans when I was so excited about how I thought certain things would turn out.

Writing and holding space for creativity looks immensely different postpartum. Before being a mom, I had endless blocks of time to write and spend how I wanted. Oh how I wish I would have spent it more wisely and finished my book. Alas, I did not, and now I squeeze in time to work on author things in the spare moments of the day. I take the minutes I can to move forward ever so slightly, often punctuated by a crying baby from the other room who needs me.

I try to fit creativity in when I can and force myself to be creative with the time I have because if I don’t, I won’t get to exercise my creative muscle. Sometimes writing feels like trying to squeeze the very last bit of toothpaste out of the tube from the corners.

Albeit stretching and often discouraging, I keep writing, keep trying, because when I do, something inside me sparks and lights. I feel alive. I feel more complete when I get to create. I feel like a better mom, wife, and person when I get to spill words across a page and weave something (hopefully) beautiful.

Today someone reminded me that in this season of new motherhood, my capacity for anything outside of mothering is much lower than it was before I was a mom. Gradually, (I’m told) my capacity will return. Until then, I’m working on lowering my expectations for what I do in a day, giving myself grace, and keeping my son as my priority. After all, he is only a little baby once and I want to be as present for him as possible.

So here is to sitting in the tension of letting go of expectations, my desire to be fully present for my baby, and my longing to keep creating. For now, I take the moments I can when he’s napping and asleep for the night to work on my book. I haven’t figured out a perfect system yet, but I’ll keep trying. If you’re fighting to keep creativity in your life, I applaud you, and I’m right there with you. We’re in this together.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://ktjayauthor.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ktjayauthor/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61556893826992

Image Credits

Cheryl Cummings, Sage Wave Media