We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Karolina Chibowska-Fellows a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Karolina, so great to have you with us and thanks for taking the time to share your thoughts with the community. So, let’s jump into something that stops so many people from going after their dreams – haters, nay-sayers, etc. We’d love to hear about how you dealt with that and persisted on your path.
Thank you for this question. It means a lot because navigating through life with haters buzzing around like pesky flies has been quite the journey in my life – I’m not going to lie. What’s even more intriguing is that the majority of them happen to be women who proudly called themselves “mental health or women rights advocates”. However, I’ve learned to navigate these challenges by staying true to myself and focusing on my goals.
First and foremost, I remind myself that the negativity from others often stems from their own insecurities and issues, rather than any shortcomings on my part. Understanding this helps me to detach emotionally from their criticisms and not take them personally. Yes, I know…. it’s easier said than done. Additionally, I surround myself with a supportive network of friends, family, and colleagues who uplift and encourage me. Moreover, I use the criticism from haters as fuel to drive me forward. Instead of allowing their words to discourage me, I channel that energy into proving them wrong and achieving my goals. Their doubt only strengthens my determination to succeed.
Lastly, I remind myself of my purpose and passion. I’m driven by a deep-seated desire to make a positive impact and pursue my dreams, regardless of the obstacles in my path. Persisting despite the haters and naysayers requires a combination of self-confidence, resilience, and a steadfast commitment to my goals. By staying true to myself and surrounding myself with positivity, I continue to push forward and overcome whatever challenges may come my way.
What’s amusing is how some of these childhood haters have resurfaced, extending invitations for coffee as if they’ve forgotten the wounds they inflicted in the past. Meanwhile, others, like former co-workers and bosses that never appreciated me, lurk on my social media, watching my happy marriage, travels, and career advancements with – I bet – a mix of curiosity and envy. Oh, well – jealousy, it seems, is a bitter pill to swallow. But for me, it’s just another reminder that I’m doing something right.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
I was raised in Wołomin, a small Polish town not far away from Warsaw, by my mother and grandparents. As a single parent, my mom, a former basketball player, navigated the good and tough sides of parenthood with grace and determination, leaving an indelible mark on my journey to becoming an independent woman in the game we call life. As I reflect on the impact she’s had on my life, I am filled with gratitude for her never-ending love and support no matter what. She has always believed in my potential. In her eyes, I was capable of achieving anything I set my mind to – even as a littie girl, and she instilled in me the confidence to pursue my passions with courage and conviction. Her belief in me became the bedrock of my own self-confidence, empowering me to navigate all the challenges with resilience and determination.
Without any doubts I wouldn’t be where I am today without her my grandparents. They became my greatest advocates, tirelessly championing my pursuits and providing the resources and opportunities necessary for my growth. Whether through long study sessions or heartfelt conversations, they taught me the importance of education and the limitless possibilities it held for my future.
It all started when my grandmother, a Polish language teacher by profession, imbued me with the gift of words, starting a passion for writing that would shape the course of my life – becoming a journalist. But beyond the technicalities of grammar, grandma along side with my grandfather taught me something far more profound – the importance of storytelling. With a twinkle in their eyes, they would fill me in with tales of history, poems and songs for children but also their own lived experiences, making enchanting narratives that sparked my imagination. I couldn’t be more thankful for that.
What happened next? After earning my bachelor’s degree in political science, I delved into the world of journalism, driven by a curiosity of the world, desire to uncover the truth and share compelling narratives with the readers or viewers. But it wasn’t until I pursued my master’s degree in documentary filmmaking and journalism that I truly found my calling. As I honed my skills behind the camera, I also embraced the fast-paced world of entertainment journalism, working for some of Poland’s biggest news and showbiz outlets. From covering the biggest red carpet events to interviewing celebrities, I thrived in the excitement of the industry, writing about fashion, lifestyle, and the latest Hollywood gossip.
In the midst of my career as a showbiz journalist and reporter, I have kept chasing my dreams as a solo traveler, exploring the world one destination at a time. From the vibrant streets of Brazil, to the serene waters of the Maldives, my adventures have taken me to breathtaking places and unforgettable experiences. Immersing myself in the colorful festivities of the famous Carnaval in Rio, I danced to the rhythm of samba and soaked in the energy of the celebrations. Amidst the pulsating beats and colorful costumes, I found myself swept away by the magic of this iconic cultural event, creating memories that will last a lifetime. Throughout my travels across European countries, from the historic streets of Paris to the charming villages of Italy or Spain I immersed myself in the rich tapestry of cultures and landscapes that Europe has to offer.
As a solo traveler, I embraced the freedom to chart my own course, to wander off the beaten path and to embrace the unknown. Along the way, I encountered new cultures, made lifelong friends, and discovered hidden treasures that expanded my horizons and enriched my soul.With each journey, I found inspiration, adventure, and a deeper understanding of myself and the world around me. Little did I know that my solo journey would lead me to Hollywood, where fate had another surprise in store for me!
No, it’s not a Lifetime movie, but definitely it could be one – love found me in the City of Angels. Falling in love with my now husband, a successful actor and producer, led me to a totally new chapter. Leaving behind the familiar comforts of my town where I grew up and lived my whole life, I embraced the unknown with open arms, ready to support my husband in his career but also carving out my own path as a journalist.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Oh, this is an interesting one! The first would be definitely resilience, the ability to bounce back from setbacks, criticism, and challenges has been crucial in navigating the ups and downs of my career and personal life. Resilience has allowed me to persevere in the face of adversity, learn from failures, and emerge stronger and more determined than before. Adaptability would be another one. Being able to adapt to changing circumstances, environments, and expectations has been essential in my journey. Whether it’s adapting to new technologies in journalism, navigating different cultures while traveling solo, or adjusting to life in a new country, adaptability has enabled me to thrive in diverse situations.
Also, self-awareness, understanding my strengths, weaknesses, values, and motivations has been instrumental in making informed decisions, setting meaningful goals, and staying true to myself. Self-awareness has empowered me to navigate challenges with clarity and authenticity, ultimately leading to greater fulfillment and success.
For those early in their (wether it is journalism, the crazy world of entertaniment in general or any other business) journey, here’s some advice on how to develop and improve these qualities.
Remember to always embrace challenges. Instead of asking “Oh my God, why me?” and shying away from difficulties, ask: “Why not me?” and view them as opportunities for growth. Each challenge you overcome builds your resilience and strengthens your ability to handle adversity in the future. Don’t be afraid to step out of your comfort zone I know, it might be difficult at first) and tackle new experiences head-on.
Also, don’t forget to seek feedback. Atively seek feedback from mentors, peers, and supervisors to gain insight into your strengths and areas for improvement. Constructive feedback can help you identify blind spots, refine your skills, and enhance your self-awareness. Be open to feedback, and use it as a tool for personal and professional development but don’t let anybody bring you down, no matter what position those people are on in life.
Lastly, adopt a growth mindset, believing that your abilities and intelligence can be developed through dedication and effort. Embrace learning opportunities, challenge yourself to try new things, and view setbacks as opportunities for learning and improvement. By cultivating a growth mindset, you’ll be better equipped to adapt to changes and overcome obstacles along your journey. By embracing challenges, seeking feedback, cultivating a growth mindset, reflecting regularly, and building a support network, you can develop and strengthen the qualities of resilience, adaptability, and self-awareness, laying a solid foundation for success and fulfillment on your journey, wherever you go.
Thanks so much for sharing all these insights with us today. Before we go, is there a book that’s played in important role in your development?
In a perfect world I would probably mention “The Secret” by Rhonda Byrne, from whom you can learn that by focusing on positive thoughts or emotions, you can attract positive outcomes and experiences into your life or that dwelling on negativity can attract more negativity. Even though I don’t like to dwell, I think facing challenges and problems is also very important. Ignoring them won’t disappear only thanks to manifestation.
Speaking of haters and other obstacles… have you ever heard about the book titled “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life” by Mark Manson. It’s a generation-defining self-help guide, where Manson cuts through the fluff and shows us how to stop trying to be relentlessly positive all the time. Instead, he encourages to embrace life’s imperfections and confront painful truths.
What did I learned from Mark Manson? A lot. Most importantly to embrace my own flaws and learn from them. Rather than striving for perfection, Manson advises us to sometimes accept our limitations, fears, and uncertainties. We’re flawed and limited, and that’s okay. Once we acknowledge this, we can find the courage and confidence we look for.
Manson, instead of sugarcoating things or promoting mindless positivity that (what I noticed) is such a popular thing right now, he delivers, let’s call it “raw truth”, that in my opinon challenges conventional wisdom. We can’t care about everything. and he encourages his readers to identify the only few things that truly matter to us while letting go of the rest. Why? Because our happiness, and resilience come from knowing what truly matters and… what doesn’t meatter to us. The key is to figure out where to direct our energy and focus on that.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: www.instagram.com/sheskaro
Image Credits
Karolina Chibowska-Fellows; Heather Serrano Photography
