Meet Kezzia Quintyne-hilaire

We recently connected with Kezzia Quintyne-hilaire and have shared our conversation below.

Kezzia , we’re so excited for our community to get to know you and learn from your journey and the wisdom you’ve acquired over time. Let’s kick things off with a discussion on self-confidence and self-esteem. How did you develop yours?

My confidence started with my mother, who always told me, “can’t is not in the dictionary.” I kept that as a mantra growing up, and it shaped my mindset. However, like anyone, I’ve had moments of doubt, especially when I decided to create my psychotherapy practice or write my self-love journal. I had to learn that it’s okay to fail. Once I released the need to do everything perfectly and accepted that I could still succeed even with flaws, I began to love myself more and give myself the grace I deserved. That shift was key to building my confidence.

Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?

I’m the owner of KQH Mental Health Counseling, a psychotherapy practice based in New York that specializes in providing individual therapy to women of color suffering from trauma, depression, work stress, and anxiety. My goal is to help women become their best selves by first saying yes to themselves.

With 15 years of experience in the mental health field, I’ve seen firsthand the negative self-talk and low self-esteem that so many of my clients struggle with. After experiencing infant loss, I also faced challenges in loving my body, which inspired me to create “My Self-Love Journal.” It’s more than just a journal; it’s a guide to help women unconditionally accept their flaws and work on shifting their mindsets. The journal includes prompts, coloring pages, and self-esteem-building techniques. Journaling has helped me show myself grace, and I hope this book can offer the same to its readers.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Looking back, I would say three qualities that were most impactful in my journey are resilience, empathy, and the ability to embrace imperfection. Resilience helped me push through the difficult moments, especially when I lost my daughter. I could have allowed my grief to deter my goals, but I kept pushing forward. Empathy allowed me to deeply connect with my clients and understand their pain, which also helped me heal. Embracing imperfection gave me the freedom to try things without the fear of failure, a lesson that was transformative in both my personal and professional life.

For those early in their journey, my advice is to stay committed to your purpose, even when things get tough. Work toward building empathy by truly listening to others and yourself; understanding your own emotions will help you connect better with others. Journaling is a perfect way to help you process your emotions. Finally, don’t chase perfection—it can paralyze you. Instead, accept that flaws are part of the process, and growth comes from showing yourself grace along the way. Like I tell my clients, the goal is “successful imperfection.”

Any advice for folks feeling overwhelmed?

When I feel overwhelmed, I prioritize self-care and try to slow down. For example, I go to my safe place, which is a beautiful spot by a lake. Being next to water brings me peace. If you don’t have a physical place that makes you feel at peace, you can always visualize one. Our minds are incredibly powerful, and we can use them to help us destress. Another effective strategy for me is journaling. It allows me to release my thoughts and emotions, helping me process what’s going on internally. Writing things down helps me gain perspective and gives me clarity on how to move forward.

I also remind myself that it’s okay to seek professional help. At one point in my life, I had a whole care team—from a therapist to a pastor. As a therapist, I know firsthand that reaching out for support is a sign of strength, not weakness. My advice to others is to find ways to check in with yourself—whether it’s through journaling, meditation, or talking to someone.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.kqhcounseling.com/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kqhcounseling/
• Other: https://www.healingpagesbykqh.shop/