We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Kitty Antix a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Kitty, we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?
I developed my confidence and self-esteem by continuing to be myself: weird, bubbly, “cartoon-y,” random, and NOT giving a “ca-ca” what others think about me. Honestly, I’m still developing. But my friends play a huge role in helping me pursue my dreams. My friends are always DOWN to do everything and anything. We are weird and fun. We love to cosplay and dress up.
Working at Disneyland and “being friends with Mickey and Minnie Mouse” was also a huge impact on my confidence and self-esteem. I was MAKING MAGIC and creating special memories for families! I was part of their magical adventures. Seeing the smiles on the children’s faces was so heart-warming. The kid’s will always remember the moment they meet Mickey and Minnie Mouse. And that right there is very fulfilling. But, not as fulfilling as a Disney Churro. HAHAHA. Pretty much, I try to keep my spirit young and carefree.
However, let’s go back a little. Back to where low rise jeans, flare bottoms, and cassette tapes were a thing.
My confidence and self- esteem was being developed from watching Britney Spears perform in the 90’s and 2000’s. She influenced me so much to pursue my love for dancing, singing, and the art of stage presence at the age of nine.
I didn’t have the privilege to take any dance or singing classes because my mom was a single mom and didn’t have time to take me. She also didn’t know where or how to enroll me. We didn’t have Tiktok or Youtube in the 90’s so I stayed home and danced in my room instead. I made up choreography or I would watch Britney Spear’s Concerts on VHS and DVD’s… Hey… DO YOU REMEMBER THOSE??!! BUWAHAHHA. This generation will NEVER know what it’s like to rewind a VHS, then breaking it, and then having to purchase another VHS cause you rewatched the darn thing too many times.
At the age of 14, my mom gifted me my first electric guitar for being a 4.12 GPA student. I started writing songs with my guitar and putting myself in school talent shows or any talent shows I could find in the cities around me. I was determined to be a star. The exposure of all the open mics, talent shows, school plays, and musicals helped boost my self-esteem and image.
My childhood, up to this point, was all self taught. At the age of 18, I went to Cal State Fullerton University to study Musical Theatre. This was when I started having serious training in singing, acting, dancing (Jazz, Ballet, and Tap), and MAN, WAS IT DISCOURAGING! I SAW STUDENTS WHO WERE BETTER THAN ME BECAUSE THEY HAD THE PRIVILEGED TO STUDY ALL OF THIS STUFF BEFORE GOING TO COLLEGE. I would watch all the girls and guys tap dance so well and I’m thinking, “Damn! they MUST’VE tap danced, ballet, jazz danced since they were babies!” It was so embarrassing to dance across the floor after them.
Here’s a secret I’m about to reveal! Sometimes, I would go in the back of the line to avoid going across the dance floor because I was so embarrassed. I knew I wasn’t good. So, I didn’t want to try and embarrass myself in front of everyone in class. Quietly, I would just watch them all be amazing while I was in the back. UGH! I remember that feeling. It feels like “caca.” I grew a lot during the semester and by the end of it, I did go across that dance floor.
My techniques were all over the place and I SWEAR TO YOU I wanted to give up. But I didn’t, because I wanted to be better. I even got held back in Jazz class cause the instructor said “I wasn’t good enough yet to proceed in the next Intermediate Dance Class” UGH!!!! I wanted to CRY!!!! I tried SO HARD! I thought I was advancing, but that was a huge blow to my self-esteem. However, my acting instructor once said, “If you fall, make sure you fall forward.” Even though, I had to take Jazz class again, I never gave up on myself.
I decided to focus on what I knew I was good at and that was SINGING!
I advanced into the Musical Theatre class where I got to learn the break downs of character building, scene study, theatre auditions, picking the right songs, and how to act. Those college years were blood, sweat, and tears!! But it was so worth it, because now I can confidently walk into an audition room and “kill it!”
I was often told that my voice was too “Pop” for Musical Theatre.
So I said, “Fine.. I’ll go to Hollywood instead of Broadway.” I privately auditioned for American Idol, America’s Got Talent, and The Voice, but it didn’t work out. I was too young and didn’t have a “life” story yet. Then, one day after uploading my self tape to Ryan Murphey’s “Glee,” I got a call saying they want me to be a part of this new TV Show called, “The Glee Project.” THAT WAS WHEN I FOUND MY LIME LIGHT!
There were so many kids my age trying to do the same thing. They were all different shapes, sizes, and ethnicities, and they were from all over the world! I FELT LIKE I FINALLY BELONGED! I FINALLY HAVE A CHANCE!! IT WAS BEAUTIFULLY INSANE! Everyone was so nice and we all became the new “Glee Project” Family. With the training I had from my university, I was so confident in myself! The dancing portion was easy, the singing section was a breeze, and I thought, “THIS IS IT! THIS IS MY BIG BREAK.” Sadly, I got cut and didn’t make it to top 10. But I learned SOOO much and made so many friendships that it made it all worth it. Befriending with all of the contestants made me realize that there is always room for each and one of us to shine. We are all different and special in our own way, and that gave me confidence to continue my music career.
After that, I decided to become a music producer, started producing, arranging, and recording my own tracks. I had my own Youtube channel already, but it was time to release it on iTunes (which is now Apple Music).
I released my first single at age 20 and was an EDM artist & music producer.
Even though “The Glee Project” didn’t work out for me, I got signed with a Hollywood acting agency AFTER they saw me on the TV Show. I continued my acting career and indie music career while all still being in school. I’m TELLING YOU, YOU CAN REALLY DO IT ALL! SO STOP LISTENING TO PEOPLE WHO DO NOT SERVE YOU! PERIOD!!!
I pushed myself to be brave and didn’t take “no” for an answer. I simply kept moving forward to gain more experience which helped me tremendously to build my self- esteem.
Lady Gaga and Ed Sheeran were big musical influences for me during the year 2012. I intertwined my love for dance music and acoustic guitar together. I just kept building my sound and my identity with SO MANY TRIALS AND ERRORS!
I also joined a heels class that did Burlesque at the age of 21 AND THAT WAS ONE OF THE BIGGEST SELF- ESTEEM BOOSTS I’VE EVER EXPERIENCED! I learned to be aware of my body, the movements of my hips, arms, head, legs and toes.
I learned how to pose and how to flip my hair. I learned what twists and turns looked good ON MY BODY and learned what did not look good. I soon learned NOT TO CARE WHAT ANYONE THINKS because I looked at myself in the mirror every day and said, “Damn, I’m Fine.” HAHA! It was female empowerment like the SPICE GIRLS but more sexy! It was the era of the “PussyCat Dolls” and Christina Aguilera’s new movie, “Burlesque.” I learned how to cat walk and knew how to command the stage.
Hands down, that Burlesque dance group was a perfect stepping stone to my “confidence” and “self-esteem” journey. I am so humbled by all of these experiences that led me to where I am today.
Remember that Jazz class?? YEAH ! NOT SO IMPORTANT ANYMORE! HAHA, just kidding. It was a little. I relearned how to dance in a way that made me feel more comfortable. It was my way and nobody else’s. I was not restricted by someone else’s rules. I made my own rules. I have never been so in tune with my body before, which gave me the confidence and self-esteem to strut down any stage today.
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
Hiya! I’m Kitty Antix! I’m a singer- songwriter, music producer, actress, and musician from Los Angeles! I write music for myself, for TV shows, and films. I love writing and producing genres like Epic Rock, Cinematic Music, Dark Pop, Trap Rock, Synth Wave, and EDM.
Music is an escape and is therapeutic for my soul. I can express whatever I am going through in my life through song. I get inspired by characters in films, TV, and books.
When writing a song about a character from a show, book, or movie, each instrument paints the arch of the character’s emotions in their story. That’s how I stay truly connected to the melodies and lyrics.
Kinda like story telling, but through sound effects and instruments.
I find ways to evolve my music by writing and producing with different genres as well. I like to travel and branch out! Experiencing different cultures, moments, being in different countries, or meeting diverse people, and connecting with musicians around the world. All of which influences my growth and my way of storytelling.
For instance, when I was a background actress on the TV Show, “Lucifer,” in Season 3 and 4, I was inspired to write a song about the main character, because after all, we all do have a little “Lucifer” in us!
So I wrote the song and titled it, “DANCING WITH THE DEVIl.”
The song went viral and fans from all over the world started using it in various art forms. They would post dancing videos, Lucifer fan videos, and gaming videos on YouTube.
I’m very grateful for the Lucifer fans out there! Shout out to ALL OF YOU!!!
“Dancing With The Devil” has over 1.9 Million Video streams on Youtube and over 520,000 streams on Spotify!
You can support me and purchase the song on iTunes/Apple Music. Purchasing the song is actually better than streaming the song. However, if you would like to stream it on Apple Music, Spotify, Pandora, and any other music streaming services, you can type “Kitty Antix – Dancing With the Devil” in the search bar.
What keeps my music career exciting is that I’m constantly working on my brand and visual art for my music. With that being said, I LOVE TO COSPLAY! I love special effects make up and costume design! I incorporate my love for fashion and cosplay with my music all the time.
Something you may not know about me is that I’m part of the Horror and Vampire Community. I LOVE HALLOWEEN and all things spooky. You can catch me in my female version of “Pennywise,” performing in horror conventions like Monsterpalooza, Midsummer Scream, and other spooky events throughout SoCal.
I also wrote a song called, “Pennywise” in 2017 that went viral on TikTok as well! Originally, fans thought the original “Pennywise Part 1” Music Video was not scary enough. So, I decided to gather and cast all the clowns I could find to be a part of my spooky second music video, “Pennywise Part 2.” You can watch any of my music videos on my YouTube Channel by searching for Kitty Antix.
Recently, I performed at the sexy “Bar Sinister” in Hollywood. The last two years I’ve performed at “Creep It Real” and I’m currently scheduled to perform again this year. As well as next year’s Los Angeles Vampire Ball. The past few summers, I have performed at The OC Fair, 626 Night Market, Concert in the Parks, casinos, restaurants, bars, and lounges. So be sure to follow me on Instagram to find out what’s coming next!
@KittyAntix
Www.Instagram.com/KittyAntix
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
I truly believe that having perseverance, tenacity, investing in myself (whether it’s self-care or career choices), continuing to put in the work, and making things happen were the most impactful qualities in my journey.
I was always a “go-getter” as a teenager and learned that if you never give up and stop, you’ll finally reach to where you are destined to be.
I tried to do everything on my own for a VERRRYYY LONG time and I learned in year 2020 (boooo pandemic!), that asking for help is not a weakness! It is a chance to grow more opportunities, build relationships, and be a part of more collaborations. I’ve also gained more perspective and ideas from asking for help.
For instance, my crazy butt decided to get a warehouse in 2020 and film a clown circus music video. I had to direct and film some parts of the music video myself because the original director bailed on me. I knew that if I was going to make this an epic horror music video, I had to ask for help. So I reached out to my horror cosplay community, friends in my circle, and asked if anyone would like to be a part of this crazy clown, circus act, fire-breathing, and eating music video.
This made my community closer and everyone was so helpful. I COULDN’T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT MY PRODUCTION CREW AND TALENTS! We built the circus pillars and signs out of Costco boxes! Everyone came to my warehouse to help paint, build the set, hang wires from the ceiling, and helped with lighting. I finally learned through this project that asking for help is very imperative.
Having the drive and keeping your dreams alive IS SO IMPORTANT. Stay true to yourself in what you want out of life and GO DO IT! Don’t TALK ABOUT IT! GO. DO. IT!
I feel like most people talk about how they want to travel the world and want to do exciting things, but never do it. DON’T BE THAT PERSON! SET A DATE AND FOLLOW THROUGH! SCARED? GOOD! Makes life so much more interesting, exciting, and worthwhile!
It took me over 15 years to be where I am today. Realize that things take time. Know that there will be times where you will fail, but it’s important to remember to enjoy the process and journey! To fall, get right back up, and do it again is such a wonderful gift. Failing shouldn’t discourage you. This is how you learn! What a great time to be alive and live through trials and errors! Because when you finally succeed, the hard work you go through will all be worth it.
My best advice is to ACCEPT YOURSELF, BE KIND TO YOURSELF, LOVE YOURSELF, and know that there is ALWAYS ROOM FOR YOU AND EVERYONE in this world. It is not competition and not a race. You are on YOUR OWN PACE, YOUR OWN TIMELINE, and YOUR OWN MAGICAL JOURNEY.
Do you think it’s better to go all in on our strengths or to try to be more well-rounded by investing effort on improving areas you aren’t as strong in?
As much as I want to pick out of the two options, I cannot. To me it is not that black and white.
It’s about finding balance. Focusing on what you love and honing in on your craft, but never being closed off to opportunity; because you never know what might help you grow! In turn, that can also help you advance in your craft and in life. And of course you have to go ALL IN in your strengths!! Why do anything half-*ssed? Lol. Be a “Bad *ss,” not a “Half *ss.”
I know my strengths and I know my weaknesses. That’s why I learned to edit all my music videos because this home girl didn’t have the money to pay someone to do it! So at the age of 21, I self produced all my music videos and DAAAAMMMNNN…. IT WAS TEDIOUS AND HARDWORK! But I got better and better. I soon realized that I do really have an eye for editing!!
I am the creative director for all my visual works and I’m able to change things without anyone’s permission. AND I LOVE IT.
I wrote and produced all of my songs. I taught myself how to play guitar (at age 14), be my own recording engineer, learned how to record instruments with MIDI, produce beats, arrange special effects sounds, learned how to play the piano, learned music theory (at age 17) and learned multiple DAWs (recording softwares) so that I can release my music out into the world.
It was endless researching and studying aaannnd it didn’t stop there.
For my live acoustic performances, I learned another skillset! I can loop my guitar and vocals to create a beautiful live show.
No one is going to put in the work or do the work for YOU! You gotta do it yourself (unless you got tons of money to pay people haha).
Sometimes you gotta choose what you can do and hire someone else to help you. That way you can save time and money!
For instance, I had to hire a make up artist to paint me as a skeleton with UV Neon colors for my music video. I can do it myself, but I was also managing the talents, making the costumes, building the set, managing the crew, and making sure I had enough energy to perform a full 11 hour filming day. IT IS INSANELY A LOT OF WORK. It was better for me to hire a make up artist to help me conserve my energy for the extraneous hours ahead of me.
Back in my early 20s, I would’ve done it myself because I didn’t have the money or experience to know that I needed to save my energy for the full day and night’s shoot. But now I do. So I’m making better choices for myself as an artist and for my mental health.
In my 20’s, for my concerts or music videos, I would be exhausted and stressed out about doing absolutely EVERYTHING!
I would do my make up and the back up dancer’s make up. Then, months before the performance or filming date, I would make sure I had all of the dancer’s measurements to sew each of their costumes and create their accessories.
In addition, I would coordinate with my cinematographer about location, lighting, sets, props, and concepts. I would make sure there would be minimal mistakes and regrets.
By learning everything as much as you can, you will learn your strengths and weaknesses. You will discover your limits and develop your sense of self.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: https://www.Instagram.com/kittyantix
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/kittyantix
- Twitter: https://www.twitter.com/kittyantix
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/kittyantix
- Other: https://www.tiktok.com/@kittyantix
