We were lucky to catch up with LaKeisha Pope recently and have shared our conversation below.
Hi LaKeisha , we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?
1. How did I develop my confidence and self-esteem is such a loaded question for me, yet interesting. From my childhood into my young adult life, I was not sure what the words confidence and self-esteem truly meant. I believed that I needed validation, pats on the back, and being told I’ve done a great job by family members or friends; that was my degree of confidence and self-esteem. During my childhood and slightly into my young adult life, I became accustomed to the validation and compliments that were rendered regarding my work ethic. I liked hearing the positive words of encouragement, which gave me the motivation to work hard in achieving good grades, being active in church, opening myself to meeting new people, attending college and graduating from a secondary level of education, and most importantly not acting “fast” as my grandmother would say, remembering to stay the course. However, it was not until April 19, 2024, that I believed and accepted that God loves me according to his word, and here is where I realized that confidence and self-esteem are essential aspects of personal growth and well-being. In my prayer, I accepted that God understood that I felt uneasy, wondering if I was doing enough or worthy of his love based solely on my work ethic. As stated in Jeremiah 31:3 “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. This helps me understand that in my accomplishments as a Christian, Therapist, Daughter, Wife, or any role that I play a part in, I had to stop looking outwards for my confidence and self-esteem; and start looking within. I took time to understand myself better. I reflect on my strengths, weaknesses, and values. I recognize my achievements and acknowledge the areas where I have grown. All-in-all, looking within my heart where God rests and abides affords me the confidence and the self-esteem within myself to know that I am enough, I am loved, I am valuable, and I am needed at such a time as this.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
As the proud founder and President of Royalty Counseling LLC, I provide mental health services, Certified Public Speaker, and Published author of “Refreshed & Trauma Free: Healing your Inner Child from hurt …”. My passion lies in cultivating a pathway that will encourage others to discover and embrace what God says about their mental health, through real-life experiences and humor. To some degree, we all have experienced some form of trauma, life adjustment, or disappointments.
I thrive whether it’s utilizing evidence-based modality during therapy, coaching individuals, or speaking to an audience to formulate confidence in themselves despite their lack of stability in their mental health. I dedicate my passion to educating others about how Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) have affected us all in one way or another; however, empowering hope through the word of God, fostering connections, and spreading genuine love, so others can see and reach their full potential. I am committed to guiding and counseling others during their journey toward their mental health purpose, building their skills and confidence for success. Through actionable personalized therapy sessions, coaching, or training programs I am dedicated to unlocking and embracing a healthier community.
Cherishing my 2nd year of marriage with my childhood crush, we are actively creating a world that brings us joy. While implementing healthy boundaries and enjoying my charismatic family members I find myself in immense happiness walking this journey of life with them. What I’m mindful of is expressing a daily routine to care deeply about my needs, desires, and weaknesses. Alongside these cherished roles, I proudly serve in my local church Greater Bethel Missionary Baptist Church in Florida where I’m the choir administrator and support. Serving within my community member of G3 Life Application Incorporation, 501 (c) 3 non-profit holistic mentoring organization that focuses on training, motivating, and empowering our youth by cultivating their Spiritual, Mental, and Physical attributes and qualities. The Herprenuer Network International is a global organization that fosters connections and opportunities for female entrepreneurs.
Apart from my organizational commitments, I am also an author, creating a space for others to create their joy on the other side of trauma within the workbook and guided journal. These resources display my passion for connecting with others to embrace what God says about them and their inner strength and worth on their path of endless love, discovery, and fulfillment.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Reflecting on my life, I believe the three most impactful qualities that attributed to my success were – continual prayer, having confidence within, and continuing to walk in fear.
Remain in continual prayer: Having a strong understanding and acceptance that prayer is an open line of communication to talk, listen, and receive instruction from God. This quality allows freedom for me to trust that I am not alone and left to the judgment and inconsistency of others. We have the instruction to be not anxious about anything but in every situation by prayer and petition, being thankful, and allowing our requests to be given to God.
Confidence within: Learning later in life that if I live for people’s approval, I will die by their criticism; was a hard pill to swallow as I grew up believing other people’s celebration of me was genuine and without motives/agenda. Learning to prioritize hard conversations with others to evaluate their motives, reflect on the cost, and be honest with myself “Am I willing to deduct the price of my holistic peace, joy, and mortality understanding that I have a limited time on this earth.” Having the boldness to walk away unapologetic from people and ideas that will not serve God’s purpose in my life. Finally, accept that not everyone will celebrate me or the God within me so I must embrace my strengths, celebrate my accomplishments, and know/believe that I am not facing challenges alone.
Continue walking even when you are filled with fear: Identifying and understanding what fear and the purpose of fear is has been another quality. Fear was created within our brains to protect us from the perception of danger. With a skewed perception, we may not walk in our full purpose and potential. With this insight according to 2 Timothy 1:7, I hide in my heart that God reminds me, he “did not give me a spirit of timidity but a spirit of power, love, and self-discipline.” Knowing that I will be faced with fear, I have a choice to hold, carry, and walk with it, or I can choose to acknowledge its purpose and decide to master growth on the other side of fear.
Summarizing prioritizing prayer will allow God to lead in hopes that you will submit and receive the benefits. One of the many benefits that I have received was learning confidence within myself and how to walk in my fear to master growth.
What’s been one of your main areas of growth this year?
My biggest area of growth has been communicating my needs and desires effectively. I struggled for years believing that my needs should be addressed after I care for others, or if I express my needs that’s a form of selfishness. However, I have learned that was so far from the truth. I began to see and understand during self-care and self-discovery how to identify and know my own needs, and the needs of others. In doing so, I discovered the strength to not be afraid to ask for what I wanted, even when my voice was shaking. I have learned when I unconsciously utilize cognitive distortions such as mind reading, emotional reasoning, or even “should” statements that no longer serve me any purpose. Finally, having the confidence to establish and utilize boundaries within areas of my life, I have discovered and hold tight to the understanding that “I am the gatekeeper to my joy”. Should anything or anyone attempt to challenge it I have the right to communicate what my needs are.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.royaltycounselingllc.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rcounselingllc/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100093411764398
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lakeisha-pope-rmhci-38b1b670/
