Meet Lissa Coffey

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Lissa Coffey a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Lissa, so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.

That’s an interesting question – is confidence something we develop or something we are born with? Do we lose confidence as we age, or do we gain confidence as we grow? And is self esteem separate from confidence or a natural by-product of it?

I don’t know these answers, but it is something to look at. I can only speak to my experience with this. I think I was a pretty confident little kid. I would dive off the high dive at the community pool, and the bigger kids would be so impressed, because they were too scared to do that. Maybe I saw them being scared and then finally thought – oh, there’s something to be scared of! Because I wouldn’t do that now! But at the time I guess no one told me that I couldn’t do it, or forbid me to do it, so I just did it.

Confidence is like a muscle, you think you can do something, and then you do it, then you know you can do it. If you don’t try, or someone tells you that you can’t, or that you shouldn’t, that can wear away at confidence.

I was lucky that growing up I had some good teachers who always encouraged me. In middle school I took a play and turned it into a musical, and our drama teacher had the whole class perform the play on stage. I entered a speech contest with little to no experience because a teacher encouraged me to, and I won!

What’s interesting is that while I had success in some areas, I had failures in other areas. But then, I look back now and see why. Now that I understand how dharma works, I can understand that it’s always been pointing me in a certain direction. I didn’t win when I ran for school president. But I did get to write an original musical for our theater group. So, maybe that’s why I didn’t go into politics, but instead pursued a career in the arts!

I really think it’s in listening to the cues from the universe, from paying attention to that inner voice, that we get our confidence. Confidence is about knowing what you can do. And self-esteem is in knowing who you are.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

My purpose in life is to bring the Bhagavad Gita to a mainstream western audience. I am doing that through my books, my music, my talks, and now I’m producing a film inspired by the Gita. I’ve been to India four times so far, and I can’t wait to go back. My next trip should be when we film the movie!

My “brand” is Ancient Wisdom, Modern Style. We can learn so much from the ancient texts. Everything we need to know about life, our manual, our roadmap, is in these texts. All the answers we need, to all the questions we could ever have, are right there. We don’t need to figure it out or make it up. It’s been provided to us. We just need to take it all in. But because these books are so old, and from other cultures, we don’t understand, we can’t relate. Here we are in this modern, high-tech society just trying to keep up and maybe catch a Netflix show in our spare time. My goal is to bring these messages to today’s audiences in such a way that inspires, uplifts, and resonates.

If you want to be involved in this exciting mission I’ve taken on, here is more info:
https://creative-visions.networkforgood.com/projects/221211-a-splendid-sun-s-fundraiser

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

1. Optimism for sure. That speech contest I won in the 7th grade was sponsored by the Optimists Club. I can’t help it, I am the eternal optimist. The Optimists Club gave me a copy of their creed and I took it to heart. I still have it in my office today. I think resilience comes from optimism, too. I always think, ok, next time it will work, or it will happen, or I’ll be able to do it. I keep trying. Each “failure” is a lesson, or a stepping stone, that brings us closer to success. Look up the Optimists Creed online and read it. It’s quite simple, and yet quite profound.

2. Faith is related to both optimism and resilience for sure. We are never alone. We are supported in everything we do, everywhere we go. There are no mistakes, only lessons learned. At some point we have to think – how did I get here, to where I am today? All the actions, steps, experiences that led up to this moment. It’s in our choices, in our thoughts, words, and deeds. So naturally if we want something different we need to set that goal and then work towards it. Is the decision taking us towards our greater good, or away from our greater good? What is the most important thing, what matters most? Lots to think about.

3. Curiosity. It’s that why or why not – looking deeper, reaching higher, expanding our horizons, thinking “outside the box” and wondering, experimenting, giving it a go just to see if we can do it. It helps to have a sense of adventure. Life is meant to be lived. I don’t want to leave anything undone.

Do you think it’s better to go all in on our strengths or to try to be more well-rounded by investing effort on improving areas you aren’t as strong in?

This is an easy question. So I’ll give a simple answer. If you want to do something, if you love doing something, if you enjoy the time you spend learning about something – then do that. There’s a reason why this appeals to you. This is leading you towards your dharma, your purpose in life.

If your heart is not in it, if you dread doing something, if you find it boring or tedious, then why force yourself? You’re wasting your time.

Now, of course, as humans, and as adults, we all have to do “life” things that might not interest us, pay taxes, insurance, take care of family responsibilities. That’s important, that’s a part of the price we pay for the great opportunity of being in a human body to grow spiritually. You have to do all that. But one person’s chore is another person’s joy! We are here for each other. Together we make the world work. We don’t have to be good at everything. Just do your best. This is how it works in a family system, we each have our roles to play. This is how it works in society, too. This is how it works in the whole universe.

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