Meet Lita Stetler and Tiffany Petri

 

We recently connected with Lita Stetler and Tiffany Petri and have shared our conversation below.

Lita and Tiffany, so great to have you on the platform and excited to have you share your wisdom with our community today. Communication skills often play a powerful role in our ability to be effective and so we’d love to hear about how you developed your communication skills.

We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Bookmates Book Club Podcast below.
Tiffany:
I think for us, we’ve had to become good communicators because we rely on communication to maintain our friendship and our relationship. We’re not together in person very often because we live in different states, and haven’t lived near one another for almost twenty years- since we were nineteen years old.

Lita:
We’ve just known each other a really long time, and we make it a priority. I think the thing that helped us develop our ability to communicate effectively is the fact that we are very comfortable being ourselves, and we let each other be ourselves, and we let down our judgments of each other and we just have a good time. We’re not afraid to be silly. We’re not afraid to laugh. We forgive quickly and easily, and we move forward and don’t dwell on things we’ve disagreed about. That has strengthened our relationship, and our ability to work together efficiently and effectively.

Tiffany:
So when it comes to the podcast, we wanted to keep doing what we love most: having our usual in depth discussions about the book we read, but learning how to let everyone in in such a way that is entertaining, but also doesn’t make them feel excluded from our conversation. Where it’s a safe space for everyone. Where all thoughts, opinions and topics are welcome to be discussed openly and without judgment, with the emphasis on just learning about each other, supporting one other, and having fun.

Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?

Lita:
For me, one of the most exciting things about doing the podcast, is that it’s another way to be excited about reading. Talking about books is also a great way to get out your feelings and kind of purge, and it’s therapeutic. It’s pretty exciting that we get to do that, and that we get to do that on a regular basis because we have the podcast. So that’s the most exciting part about it for me, is that it’s we’re not just “doing the podcast”. We’re having fun and spending time together, meeting new people, and having conversations with those people, and it’s all surrounding books. Which is the best thing in the world, right?

Tiffany:
It really is. I completely agree. For me, it’s just been very therapeutic, because you just find so much in books that you either really relate to and can see yourself in, find yourself in; and when you don’t relate to it, get to hear about how it relates to others and their journeys, and you gain a whole new perspective about something. I love that. That’s the beautiful thing about books and book clubs. And it’s just so fun and rewarding to foster that kind of community with people, with our listeners, with readers, and with women and men alike. It’s been so fun and special to also be able to do something like this with my best friend in the world. To turn the thing that we’ve pretty much been doing since we were twelve years old into something that people can be a part of is so rewarding and satisfying.

This summer we will be launching an exclusive Patreon channel: Bookmates After Dark. It’s exactly how it sounds! It will be fun way to take it further, and flex more creative muscles there, and branch out in a completely different type of way that is unfiltered, and even more fun.

Lita:
The other exciting thing that we are going to be dipping our toes into, is getting some merch available in the near future. We have some really fun ideas there, and we’re really excited to get that up and running.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Tiffany:
The knowledge that came with the hobbies/projects that we did in our teenage years- like learning how to edit etc., helped give us a built-in skill set that has been so helpful in this process that we’re in now. Having said that, there was a lot we had to learn, and are still learning. So I’d say adaptability is a big one. If we don’t know something, we really dig in to where we can learn what we need to know.

Lita:
We’re open-minded. We have perseverance. You have to keep trying, even when you feel like what you’re doing isn’t amazing. I think it’s more that we DON’T have the knowledge yet, we’re seeking the knowledge when we’re reading a book. We want to improve as people. When you’re reading a book it’s not about what you know. You talk about it later, but you’re talking about something that someone else wrote. So as you read your mind opens up and expands, and takes in more information and knowledge. So reading is really about expanding your knowledge.

Tiffany:
The most important quality I think we’ve mastered is that we have respect for each other at the end of the day. Even if we disagree.

Lita:
Yes. We’re not the same person and we acknowledge that. We also give ourselves the right to be ourselves with each other. Even if we say something the other person doesn’t like or the other way around.

Tiffany:
And that’s what makes us such a good team, and how we’re able to be best friends and also work together. It is a completely different dynamic, and taking that approach with each other is what makes it continue to work.

As far as advice goes: Leave your insecurities at the door, and stop worrying about what other people think. Own your authenticity and what you bring to table. Have faith in that and in yourself, and what you want to accomplish. Just do you, and let it happen; don’t stand in your own way.

Lita:
Just keep going, keep trying, and keep pushing forward. Do it because you love to do it, not because you’re expecting a payoff of any kind. You’re just doing it because it’s something that you want to do that you’re passionate about. Keep trying even if you feel like you’re failing. Because you’re not. You’re not failing.

Tiffany:
Also getting over that initial hump of excitement, that initial drive, and realizing that it is going to take work, time, and dedication; and to not give up on your passion when it starts to get a bit overwhelming. Because it inevitably will. Embracing adaptability, and embracing the trial and error of the process instead of resenting it goes a long way.

As we end our chat, is there a book you can leave people with that’s been meaningful to you and your development?

Lita:
Well, obviously, ACOTAR aka: A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas renewed our love of reading. We have been reading since before ACOTAR, and I think that we found out a lot about our journeys, our favorite books, and impactful books for us, through exploring different authors and different genres that we hadn’t explored before. Keeping an open mind and reading outside the box.

Tiffany:
I don’t feel like I could narrow it down to just one book that played an important role for me, because I’ve always been a reader, even as a little kid. You pick up so many nuggets (or boulders) of wisdom along the way, and take one from every book that you read, every author with a new perspective. And I think that books, in general, whether they be fiction or non-fiction, well written or awful, just give you a perspective that you didn’t start out with, and you can apply it to your life in ways that are really meaningful. From the small and mundane, to big things that change the way you see and live life.

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