Meet Marena Koenka

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Marena Koenka. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Marena, we are so deeply grateful to you for opening up about your journey with mental health in the hops that it can help someone who might be going through something similar. Can you talk to us about your mental health journey and how you overcame or persisted despite any issues? For readers, please note this is not medical advice, we are not doctors, you should always consult professionals for advice and that this is merely one person sharing their story and experience.

I have dealt with mental health challenges for as long as I can remember, and was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder when I was 15. When I was 19, I was also diagnosed with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder , which shows up for me most often in the form of intrusive thoughts and contamination OCD (a fear of getting sick from food or germs). I also struggled with disordered eating during my teens and early 20s. When I received my first diagnosis, I was afraid to tell anyone. I felt ashamed of my struggles and worried that if anyone knew, they would feel as if they had to walk on eggshells around me and see me as “broken”. I felt like every part of my identity was now overshadowed by mental illness.

The biggest factor in overcoming the stigma and shame that surrounded my diagnosis was, and is, my drive to help others. Though being open about my experience scared me, I hoped that by doing so, I could help others feel less alone. The lack of mental health education in my high school spurred me to begin presentations in health classes about my struggles with mental health challenges and the tools I used to cope. When people in those classes began to open up about their experiences and share how my story helped them, I felt that everything I’d gone through was worth it.

The first time I shared my story I was 16. Now I’m 26 and have spoken to high schoolers, college students, health care professionals, first responders, people in inpatient units, family members of people who have mental health issues, teachers, community members…in short, people from all walks of life because everyone knows someone who has been affected by mental health challenges, or has been affected themselves. I work with NAMI Massachusetts as a mental health speaker and NAMI Maine as a mental health community trainer. This allows me to connect with tons of people in New England, which I’m really grateful for.

I still struggle, some days more than others. I use a combination of therapy, medication, and wellness strategies (like movement, engaging in activities I love, connecting with community, intuitive eating etc.) to support myself. But even on the hard days, I find hope in the fact I’ve helped even just one person feel less alone.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

I run Sunset Ridge Photography; I specialize in intimate wedding photography and I absolutely adore it! Being a photographer gives me the opportunity to connect with so many different, incredible people as I capture their memories. I get to be peoples’ biggest cheerleader, help them feel comfortable, and photograph their unforgettable experiences.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

I think that my ability to connect with others, my tenacity, and my ability to follow my gut feeling have been the most impactful on my journey. Connecting with people has been instrumental in creating genuine, long-lasting friendships, and in growing my photography business. It helps my clients feel comfortable and seen and creates a network of people who enjoy working with me and refer their friends. My tenacity has kept me going through many mental and physical challenges. I refuse to give up, even when doors close. I keep myself open to new and different opportunities that may not have come along if it wasn’t for that closed door (while also giving myself space to be temporarily upset over opportunities lost). Especially as someone who’s been socialized as a woman, I’ve grown up in a society that has tried to convince me to not listen to how I feel. Re-connecting with myself and trusting my gut feelings when it comes to situations and people, both personal and professional, has been key.

My pieces of advice are to step out of your comfort zone, remember that a “no” or a “failure” isn’t the end of the journey, to view every type of job/opportunity as a learning experience, and to really learn to check in with how certain situations make you feel (as opposed to how society says you should feel about it). Because of my anxiety and shy nature, I am not someone that is inherently comfortable talking to people I don’t know well. I I improved on my ability to connect with people the most during my time working as a server and at Trader Joe’s, both jobs that society doesn’t place a lot of value on, but were key to my growth. Continually checking in with how your body physically feels in different situations is a good way to practice following your gut instinct. Ask yourself “Does this spark joy?” to help you decide which choices may be best for you.

Honestly though, as cheesy as it sounds, the most import thing is to be yourself. And I know everyone says that, but I truly believe that has been the most impactful element to my journey. I spent a lot of years trying to be someone I wasn’t because I thought that would help me fit in and be more likable. Spoiler alert: all it did was make me unhappy, unsure of myself, and disingenuous. When I started being true to myself (again, cheesy, I know), that’s when I really started to build a life of joy and growth, both personally and professionally.

How would you describe your ideal client?

At Sunset Ridge Photography, all love, genders, bodies, races, ethnicities, and cultures are welcome! My ideal clients value their community and supporting local businesses. They love spending quality time with each other and their loved ones. They are authentic and kind people who prioritize experiences. They want a wedding that is stress-free with a focus on connection and authenticity. My ideal clients want a photographer who will help them feel comfortable, heard, taken care of, and have their back on their wedding day!

Contact Info:

Image Credits

Marissa Elise Photography
Wild Lotus Creative
Laura Rodrigue Photography

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