Meet Megan Holman

We recently connected with Megan Holman and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Megan , appreciate you sitting with us today to share your wisdom with our readers. So, let’s start with resilience – where do you get your resilience from?

It was a necessary survival skill. I’ve faced many forms of adversity that brought me to my knees, and I had a choice each time: do I give up and surrender, or do I get back up and keep fighting? Sometimes, choosing to keep moving forward was exhausting; so many times, I just wanted to lie down and quit. I didn’t believe I had a purpose for a long time. I felt like I was blindly stumbling through the dark, completely lost. I thought resilience was a burden, a means of merely surviving through the storms that swirled around me. At one time, I resented the need to be resilient. I didn’t believe I was strong or capable enough to endure. When you live in survival mode constantly, you build a natural resilience that you may not even recognize. But there was always this fire inside of me that I couldn’t deny, and it drove me forward. I had to find a purpose to hold on to, something worth continuing to move towards. I asked myself what I wanted my life to look like, and I began to form a vision of what exactly I was fighting for. Once I found that purpose, resilience slowly became something I could recognize in myself that I could be proud of because I’ve made it against impossible odds, and I’m still standing, still learning, and building the life of peace and simple abundance I’ve always dreamed of. I’m a work in progress; being human is a lifelong journey of learning, and not all of it is easy and fun. But as I watch my life blossom around me, I can look back and see just how important continuing to look for hope was to me, how important continuing to persevere was, because I wouldn’t have the life I do now if I’d given up.

Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?

I grew up in very dysfunctional and often toxic environments. From the age of about five years old until well into my 30s, I experienced multiple forms of abuse, including physical, sexual, emotional, and verbal abuse. That changed me profoundly; over time, I transformed from an energetic and very curious little girl to a young woman who only understood the world as a place of danger and pain where there was nothing and no one who could provide shelter and protection. Survival became the only thing I knew, and for the majority of my years, that was how I lived: one day and one battle at a time.

I had this burning desire to know what I was supposed to do with my existence here, but I felt like I was looking for the answer to a riddle I didn’t know how to even begin to solve. I knew that I wanted to make a difference to others, to leave an impact, and be a positive force in someone else’s life. My journey led me down many unexpected detours. After exploring many options, I decided to obtain a teaching credential. I was a single mother disconnected from my family and raising a special needs child alone while going to college full time and working full time in the educational system. I obtained my special education certification and began teaching, a career I was proud of and found very fulfilling. I found joy in the work I was doing and in building a safe and happy life for my child. I married my husband in early 2018, and together we began building our lives with our children.

However, I began to struggle with an unknown illness. I was forced to resign from teaching and began another new journey, a new fight for my life. After several years, I was finally diagnosed with lupus and several other chronic illnesses. My hopes of finding answers that would allow me to return to the teaching field were shattered. I felt lost and directionless. I’d worked so hard to build my career, and it was suddenly gone; it was an uncomfortably familiar feeling. I wasn’t ready to surrender yet. I still wanted to serve, to fulfill a purpose, to make a difference. I realized that I first had to heal myself. In working with my support team, I began to transform myself and my life from the inside out. It took a lot of work, unlearning, relearning, and shifting perspectives, but life began to change, and I found a new purpose. I couldn’t return to the mainstream workforce, but I had skills, knowledge, and talents that could still be put to good use.

I decided to launch Learning To Live Coaching. I’ve met so many others along my way who want to grow and transform their lives into something beautiful, but they struggle to overcome the challenges that are blocking their way. There’s a moment that comes when you realize that all you know how to do is survive, you suddenly understand that you now need to learn to truly live life to the fullest, and taking on those lessons is what begins the change that removes those barriers. You start to see your life differently, your perspective of adversity changes, you learn tools and skills that make your goals and dreams achievable, and you begin to find joy, beauty, and blessings in the simple things again. I’ve worked with amazing women who felt stuck and unsure how to begin moving towards the life that they desired, and I’ve been blessed to be trusted as a mentor and support for them on their journeys. They’ve helped me to continue learning more about myself and my journey in return.

I’m creating a community for those who are looking to make positive changes in their life but aren’t sure where to get started. Community is a powerful tool, and the support of like-minded people is vital when making big shifts, particularly for those who are managing chronic illnesses or reclaiming themselves from painful pasts. Through my Phoenix Rising program, we work together to lay the foundations of the goals they want to accomplish and map out the path to the future they want to build. I’m getting ready to launch a book club where we can learn and grow together, sharing ideas and experiences as we support each other towards our dreams. I’m also preparing to partner on a podcast with a good friend and business associate where we’ll discuss building bridges of hope, faith, and courage across cultures and theologies to create communities of mutual understanding and support.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Dedication to lifelong learning has provided me with many opportunities and allowed me to pivot and find new opportunities to explore when life didn’t turn out as expected. Being willing to continue learning has allowed me to reinvent myself as many times as needed. Recognizing that there were skills and knowledge sets I needed to acquire to further both my personal growth and my aspirations allowed me to create definitive pathways towards my goals for the future. I truly believe that the day we believe we have nothing left to learn is the day we halt our ability to continue growing. Life itself is a learning process, and there is always something more that we can improve upon.

Self-awareness was one of the most beneficial qualities I learned to develop in myself. I had to know myself before I could begin to make changes that would lead me forward in the life I wanted to create. I had to be willing to take a deep look at my strengths and weaknesses, my gifts and my faults. I had to be willing to look in the mirror and be honest with myself about my struggles, my patterns, and my beliefs, even when what I saw in my reflection was uncomfortable and difficult to face. Without that full understanding of myself, I couldn’t know where I needed to heal, grow, and invest in myself to bring about the future I wanted for myself and my family.

Mindfulness has been one of the most transformative practices I have applied in my journey. When life has been challenging and you’ve lived stuck in survival mode, you can become trapped by the past while constantly worrying about the future. We miss out on the present moment and the opportunities it presents, and life begins to slip past you unnoticed. Now is the only moment that matters; now is where our power lies. Using mindfulness practices allows me to enjoy my daily experiences with purpose and intention. When needed, I can reflect upon past lessons learned without allowing painful memories to control my decisions, and I can plan for the future without fear or anxiety. Mindfulness brings clarity and peace to the present and allows me to enjoy the life I’m living to the fullest with the ones who matter most to me.

Okay, so before we go, is there anyone you’d like to shoutout for the role they’ve played in helping you develop the essential skills or overcome challenges along the way?

I had many teachers and mentors along the way who left a vital impact on my life. Though each of our journeys is individual and ultimately we each are the masters of our fate, I don’t believe that we are meant to talk alone. Community is important as you make vital transformations to yourself and your life, it provides a sense of support and belonging that is invaluable during a period that can be very vulnerable and sometimes uncomfortable. Having an experienced mentor, someone who has travelled a similar path before you, gives you the confidence that can help you to kindle your motivation, inspiration, and drive. It provides a safe place to ask questions, to challenge beliefs and perceptions, and to deeply explore both your own identity and your place in the world around you.

My mentors helped me to recognize and embrace my strengths, to recognize and strive to improve the aspects of myself that I felt fell short of who I wanted to be, and they walked with me on the journey to cultivate myself and apply the lessons I learned along the way. They didn’t do the work for me; that was mine to do, but they shared their knowledge and expertise, helping me to expand my understanding and create a roadmap to the destination I desired to reach.

Now, I get to pass their kindness forward to others by being a coach and mentor myself, helping others to recognize their strengths and develop the skills and knowledge they need to begin their transformations. Our potential is only limited by our belief in our abilities, and I feel truly blessed to be able to use my life experiences and education to empower and serve others in creating their path to the lives that they desire.

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