Meet Monty Manicure

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Monty Manicure a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Monty, we’re so appreciative of you taking the time to share your nuggets of wisdom with our community. One of the topics we think is most important for folks looking to level up their lives is building up their self-confidence and self-esteem. Can you share how you developed your confidence?

Self esteem and confidence was something that I have struggled with my entire life. Looking back on my life so far, there was always one common denominator that helped me when my confidence or self esteem wavered. Here is the story of how music saved my life.

Growing up as a queer kid, I always knew I was different, and that alone is enough to send a young mind into a spiral of confusion and self doubt. My journey through self discovery was not at all a paved road, it had stretches of mud and dirt, sometimes it was a chasm in the earth, and sometimes it was strong and flat like concrete. My earliest struggle began in elementary school, a place where a kid can be a kid, but if your different, you are labeled as an outcast and bullied. I didn’t realize I was gay until later in life, but what made me different was the way I talked. I had a speech impediment, a stutter that would make casual conversation nearly impossible. No one wanted to talk to me, and when they did, all they could focus on was my stutter. Imagine the words that you want to say are on a teleprompter in your mind that is moving way too fast. My mouth couldn’t keep up with the words on my internal teleprompter, and as soon as i got caught on a word, the stutter would take over and I was unable to communicate. Years and years of speech therapy helped me, but multiple times a week I was pulled from my studies to go to speech therapy and that only further alienated me from the rest of the kids. One of things that helped me during the speech therapy classes was music, it was able to say the things I wanted and needed to say. When I sang and danced and was able to lose myself in the melodies, that was when my stutter would momentarily disappear. The beat allowed me to keep track and control the “teleprompter” speed, through sing-alongs and transferring the technique of lighting every word to a beat, I realized I was able to talk again. To this day, when my stutter comes to the forefront, I remind myself of the ability to control the “sing-along” speed of the words in my mind.

Coming out was hard, like many others I feared being shunned by my family and left on the streets to fend for myself. Music helped me gather the courage to overcome that, I was blind to queer representation in music for a long time, that is until I discovered Lady Gaga. “Born This Way” is an anthem of self acceptance and love, I have those words tattooed on my arm because that is the song that gave me the confidence to come out. Little by little, I would sprinkle bits of Lady Gaga into my family conversations and day-to-day life, in hopes that they would catch on. When the day finally came, I was surprised at my family’s reaction, they didn’t care who I loved, as long as I was happy. When I asked them if they were upset that I was gay, they responded “You were born that way, why would we be upset?” Today, they are all huge fans of her, and we often celebrate my queerness together. Without music artists like Gaga, many of us may not have the confidence to be our true selves.

After coming out, I had a newfound energy, wanting to explore the world as this new and improved version of myself. The decision to become a truck driver at 22 years old was sudden, and the opportunity seemed to fall into my lap. Before I knew it, my suitcase was packed and I was on a bus from Tucson, AZ to Harrisburg, PA to start a new adventure. Being on the road was a dream come true, I was able to meet new people, see new places, and for the first time in my life, live life the way I wanted. Constantly in motion, I traveled from coast to coast with a predetermined route and was never in one city for more than a few days at a time. This made meeting new people very easy, being able to pre-plan my trip and start conversations with people online and continue them in-person, was an exciting perk to the job with an ever changing view. Almost everywhere I went; I was able to create fantastic and wondrous memories such as things from visiting the Gateway Arch, to standing on the historic grassy knoll in Dallas, TX. Unfortunately, there is one memory that created a painful burn that is still healing today, and that was in Montgomery, AL. Surviving the attack was my first priority, and waking up and realizing that I was bleeding was terrifying. The team at the hospital I drove myself to, though I don’t remember their names, are my heroes by reassuring that I was going to live. The police investigation was short because I was scared, if my friends and family had found about the sexual assault, what would they say about me? The last thing I remember before blacking out, were harsh words that resembled, “this is because you are gay”. This sent my mind into a tailspin, very quickly falling out of love with my queerness, and sending me to the deepest darkest corners of my mind. In this darkness, my only light was music. Through the music, healing had begun, and my connection to the lyrics allowed me to process what had happened in Alabama. Thanks to the music, I was able to navigate the deepest crevasse in my journey of self discovery and slowly rebuild my self-esteem. Other than the hospital crew, I hadn’t told anyone but the music about what happened that night, and it helped but only for a few months. My 18-wheeler, originally a chariot for adventure, had transformed into a mental prison.

My phone calls back home grew few and few, my family had known something had changed and had wondered when i’d be back to Tucson. One random day later, my family called with a cancer scare. Worried about test results and ongoing appointments, I could no longer focus on my job and I saw this as an opportunity to leave the truck. Returning to Tucson is exactly what I needed at the time, and even though i still didn’t tell anyone, it was nice to be around my family and slowly be able to trust people again. A few months later, I had built enough self-esteem and confidence to meet new people again, and after lots of misses, I met the love of my life. Steven was able to pick up my broken pieces and make me new, he allowed me to fall again in love with being a queer person, he loves me through all of my insecurities like my stutter, he never judged me and allowed me to become a strong survivor. Today he continues to help me through my most recent endeavor on the journey of self discovery.

Drag queens had always been fabulous creatures, unfraid of the world, and beacons of the LGBTQ community. My self-esteem and confidence still needed a boost, my creativity was blooming, and I had gotten interested in the transformational power of makeup. Montgomery, AL had left a scar and I was getting tired of being afraid of it, the name Monty Manicure came to my mind during a rush of memories and emotions. Monty is short for Montgomery, and Manicure is a play on the words “man” and “cure”. I wanted to be able to give power back to myself and strip myself of the fear that the memory of Montgomery would create. Monty allows me to create a warrior that speaks through music, my lip-sync performances allow me to do what I have been doing with music my entire life, heal. Under the shield of makeup, dresses and heels, combined with the power of music, my confidence and self-esteem skyrockets. Monty Manicure’s first performance was a local competition called “Rumble in the Old Pueblo”, I had messaged a well known local queen and she was gracious enough to let me perform, without ever even meeting me. I was added to a group chat that contained the list of songs I had to learn and the first song I noticed was “The Edge of Glory” by Lady Gaga. When I arrived at the bar, I was so nervous, because I was about to pit myself against some amazing local talent. Introducing myself to the other entertainers sent my stomach into knots but then I remembered, that they were not being introduced to Chris, they were meeting Monty Manicure! When the show began, we had learned that our song choices were to be chosen by a spinning wheel, I watched nervously and the wheel slowed and landed on the song. Adrenaline ran through my body as the intro to “Edge of Glory” started playing and suddenly I felt alive, the music coursed my body and I didnt have a care in the world. I would like to say I won that night, but that wasnt the case, instead I left that bar with some fantastic new friends and words of encouragement from everyone around. I had found it, drag was the answer to the question that I didnt know I was asking. Drag has allowed me to host shows that further help to overcome my stutter, become an advocate for sexual assault survivors by raising money for local organizations, celebrate queerness and raise visibility by performing at pride events around Arizona, and challenging myself by competing in competitions such as prelims to the Miss Gay America pageant system. Most recently, I have been named Dame XVIII to The Imperial Court of Arizona, which is a non-profit organization that strives to unite the heterosexual and queer communities through events and fundraising and being able to work the youth of Tucson as a coach and mentor for youth drag workshops has been the most rewarding aspects of my drag career. Most importantly, I have created long lasting friendships within the local drag community, some of which have a story similar to mine, and I have realized that sharing my story has helped other people empower themselves to raise their own confidence and self esteem.

Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?

Professionally, my drag is the main focus and it has allowed me to host shows that give local entertainment a chance that was similar to the chance I was given. It has also let me become an advocate for sexual assault survivors by raising money for local organizations like SACASA (Southern Arizona Center Against Sexual Assault) at my recent show called Melody Mix-Up, all of the tips that were collected by my entertainers were generously donated to SACASA, we raised $400 in two hours for a fantastic organization that helps SA survivors like myself. As entertainers its our job to celebrate queerness and raise visibility by performing at local pride events like Tucson Pride. 2023 was a special year and a highlight of all my pride performances because I had the privilege of headlining the festival with my musical style drag show called Strut, a showcase of local talent telling the story of a brand new drag queen and the camaraderie of the drag community. Monty’s endeavors has allowed me to challenge myself by competing in competitions, such as, preliminaries to the Miss Gay America pageant system, and IBT’s Drag Race Season 9, an upcoming weekly competition that mirrors the global phenomenon that is Rupaul’s Drag Race, at Tucson’s premier gay bar IBT’s Bar and Food starting on September 8th, 2024. Most recently, I have been named Dame XVIII to The Imperial Court of Arizona, which is a non-profit organization that strives to unite the heterosexual and queer communities through events and fundraising such as my earlier mentioned Melody Mix-Up, I am proud to be a representative and an active member in trying to better the Tucson community. Another exciting opportunity that being a drag queen has allowed me to do is being able to work the youth of Tucson as a coach and mentor for youth drag workshops which start in September 2024. Once a month alongside the incredible local drag talents of Melon, Justin Deeper-Love, and Mr. Wolf, the four of us are teaching workshops that allow the local youth to try drag if they so choose by learning how to do makeup, increase stage presence, making outfits and ultimately performing in a show of their own. Later this year, I will be hosting an event created by myself and my Imperial Court of Arizona line partner Elliot Lubke, Knight XVIII to the Imperial Court of Arizona, called the Rainbow Games, an olympic style fundraising event that will benefit Special Olympics Arizona. I am proud at what i’ve been able to accomplish in the short time as a drag queen, and even more excited for what is to come.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

The three qualities that had the most impact in my journey, are willingness to adapt and learn, the ability to let go and reset, and the drive to better oneself. Being able to adapt to life’s constant changes, life will never take the track that you expect it and its ok to fail. Learn from your mistakes, if something isnt working, its totally fine to try again. Letting go of your traumas is extremely challenging and it will never happen all at once. Take your time to process, this about your healing process, I feel that I am at a point in my life that I am beginning to triumph over my trauma and it came to me by expressing myself and talking to others about what happened. Monty is the outlet that i chose to help me reset and return power that I thought i had lost. Find things that you are passionate about and if you have the opportunity, give back and raise awareness for issues that you are excited about. Dont be afraid to challenge yourself, learn something new, and you may surprise yourself.

What has been your biggest area of growth or improvement in the past 12 months?

I am most proud of myself when I look at my growth in the past year., specifically in the aspect of connecting with people. It was in this past year that I overcame the fear of telling people I dont know, that I am a sexual assault survivor. The question of “Why did you start drag?” comes up more than i expected, and i realized that when i tell my story, i am able connect to with my audience on a personal level and they see me not only as an entertainer, but the human under the all of the glamour. Every time i talk about Montgomery, AL, it comes easier and hopefully gives others the courage to talk to someone if they have a similar story.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://linktr.ee/MontyManicure
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/montythedragqueen?igsh=MTJ2Z3N5cHhlbTN4aw==
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/y3QJzrS2c9kAUAq5/?mibextid=qi2Omg

Image Credits

Steven Uhrig, and Ferdinand James Photography