We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Nicklaus Rueda. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Nicklaus below.
Nicklaus , we’re thrilled to have you on our platform and we think there is so much folks can learn from you and your story. Something that matters deeply to us is living a life and leading a career filled with purpose and so let’s start by chatting about how you found your purpose.
When I sat down and thought about what message I wanted to convey through this interview, I found myself struggling with what my “story” would be. My life has been a series of ups and downs, joys and traumatic episodes, pains and comfort. So, I decided that the most impactful “story” I could tell would be how I found my purpose.
I’m 35 years old and to be honest, I still don’t know what my purpose is. I’m still figuring it out every day, but what I do know is that the trauma and losses I’ve experienced to has made me in to the human being that I am today.
The story I want to share today is a my experience with substance abuse, addiction, death, and how these traumatic events helped me find what I want out of this life that I’m privileged to live.
As it stands today, every single friend I’ve ever made before the age of 18 years old has died. I have absolutely no friends on Earth from my childhood. These friends were not just my friends, they were my brothers and sisters. They were my family. Unfortunately, my last living childhood friend passed away this past Summer in 2024. I’ve lost a total of 9 childhood friends to addiction and substance abuse. As a 35 year old man, I’ve struggled with the fact that I no longer share any memories from my childhood with any single person on planet earth outside of my immediately family. It’s hard knowing that I can’t reminisce with anybody about “the good ol times” because there’s nobody to remember those times with. It’s even harder accepting the fact that I should be dead just like they are. Why am I still here when each of them lost their lives? What makes me so special? Why am I still here? I WAS doing drugs and managing active addiction just like they were. We did it all together…..
Each of my friends who lost their life were good people, caring people, kind people that loved life and loved the people around them, but in the end, they numbed their traumas and mental health battles with drugs and alcohol, and I did the same.
When my first best friend passed away at the age of 19, it crushed me, and I vowed to make sure that I live for him. I would make sure to do the things in life that him and I always talked about. And as each of my friends passed away as the years went on, I continued living to make sure that their lives were not forgotten and I lived my life for THEM. I lived the life they didn’t get to live.
When I was 27 years old, my wife and I (my girlfriend at the time) found out we were having a baby. It was in that moment that I found the strength to turn my life around, even though my friends, the ones who were still alive, were still deep in their addictions. I’d never turn my back on my friends, and I didn’t, I was there for them still even as I regained control of my life, but I wanted more for my life and my future family’s life. So I did, and as the years went on, my friends continued to die one by one up until last year when the last friend died.
Today as a 35 year old father to two boys and husband to a beautiful wife, I still don’t know what my purpose is here on earth, but what I do know is that I don’t want to leave this earth with any regrets. I don’t want to die wishing I could have done something. Every single morning that I wake up now, through spiritual conversation, I thank each of my dead friends for the impact they had on my life when they were here on Earth with me, and for the impact they continue to have on my life each and every single day. My wife and I joke about it but we can FEEL their presences in our home and in our body’s. I am not religious, but I can feel that their souls live in me. So I’m making sure that I try everything at least once before I leave this existence in honor of each of them.
I’m a comedian, I’m a musician, I’m a poet, I’m a career professional, I’m an eco-traveler, I speak three languages (not good), I’m a father, I’m a husband, I restore antique furniture, I make art, I’m an event coordinator, I’m on the board of a non-profit organization and I’m an activist, and I do so much more.
In honor of my friends who are no longer here with us, I will live my life and show my two boys that life is worth living. I will not just tell them that life is worth living, I’m choosing to be the visual example for my sons so that they grow up and never question the beauty of life, the gift of life, and so that they understand how precious life is and that it can be taken from them at any moment. I’m choosing to show my sons that life is worth living, and as I type this, all I can think is that I hope so badly that I’m making each of my friends proud….
….. they are my inspiration.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
When I sat down and thought about what message I wanted to convey through this interview, I found myself struggling with what my “story” would be. My life has been a series of ups and downs, joys and traumatic episodes, pains and comfort. So, I decided that the most impactful “story” I could tell would be how I found my purpose.
I’m 35 years old and to be honest, I still don’t know what my purpose is. I’m still figuring it out every day, but what I do know is that the trauma and losses I’ve experienced to has made me in to the human being that I am today.
The story I want to share today is a my experience with substance abuse, addiction, death, and how these traumatic events helped me find what I want out of this life that I’m privileged to live.
As it stands today, every single friend I’ve ever made before the age of 18 years old has died. I have absolutely no friends on Earth from my childhood. These friends were not just my friends, they were my brothers and sisters. They were my family. Unfortunately, my last living childhood friend passed away this past Summer in 2024. I’ve lost a total of 9 childhood friends to addiction and substance abuse. As a 35 year old man, I’ve struggled with the fact that I no longer share any memories from my childhood with any single person on planet earth outside of my immediately family. It’s hard knowing that I can’t reminisce with anybody about “the good ol times” because there’s nobody to remember those times with. It’s even harder accepting the fact that I should be dead just like they are. Why am I still here when each of them lost their lives? What makes me so special? Why am I still here? I WAS doing drugs and managing active addiction just like they were. We did it all together…..
Each of my friends who lost their life were good people, caring people, kind people that loved life and loved the people around them, but in the end, they numbed their traumas and mental health battles with drugs and alcohol, and I did the same.
When my first best friend passed away at the age of 19, it crushed me, and I vowed to make sure that I live for him. I would make sure to do the things in life that him and I always talked about. And as each of my friends passed away as the years went on, I continued living to make sure that their lives were not forgotten and I lived my life for THEM. I lived the life they didn’t get to live.
When I was 27 years old, my wife and I (my girlfriend at the time) found out we were having a baby. It was in that moment that I found the strength to turn my life around, even though my friends, the ones who were still alive, were still deep in their addictions. I’d never turn my back on my friends, and I didn’t, I was there for them still even as I regained control of my life, but I wanted more for my life and my future family’s life. So I did, and as the years went on, my friends continued to die one by one up until last year when the last friend died.
Today as a 35 year old father to two boys and husband to a beautiful wife, I still don’t know what my purpose is here on earth, but what I do know is that I don’t want to leave this earth with any regrets. I don’t want to die wishing I could have done something. Every single morning that I wake up now, through spiritual conversation, I thank each of my dead friends for the impact they had on my life when they were here on Earth with me, and for the impact they continue to have on my life each and every single day. My wife and I joke about it but we can FEEL their presences in our home and in our body’s. I am not religious, but I can feel that their souls live in me. So I’m making sure that I try everything at least once before I leave this existence in honor of each of them.
I’m a comedian, I’m a musician, I’m a poet, I’m a career professional, I’m an eco-traveler, I speak three languages (not good), I’m a father, I’m a husband, I restore antique furniture, I make art, I’m an event coordinator, I’m on the board of a non-profit organization and I’m an activist, and I do so much more.
In honor of my friends who are no longer here with us, I will live my life and show my two boys that life is worth living. I will not just tell them that life is worth living, I’m choosing to be the visual example for my sons so that they grow up and never question the beauty of life, the gift of life, and so that they understand how precious life is and that it can be taken from them at any moment. I’m choosing to show my sons that life is worth living, and as I type this, all I can think is that I hope so badly that I’m making each of my friends proud….
….. they are my inspiration.
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
The skills, qualities, and knowledge that were most impactful for me may not be as impactful to someone else, everyone’s life is not universal, but if there’s anyone reading this that can relate to my story, my advice is don’t give up. Please, don’t give up. Your life is worth living. You are worth the life you have. Life is not easy for most people, but the one thing I learned in my life is that if you can find the strength to make it through the bad, life will always reward you with something good. The bad sometimes may feel like it’s going to last forever and you’ll never make it out of the bad, I know what this feels like because this was me. I accepted that the “bad” was just my life and I shouldn’t dream about the good to come because I’m only giving myself false hope. But the good DID come, eventually. Today, I still struggle with mental health and the traumas of my past, but through it all, I am grateful every single morning that I wake up, breathe air, and have the privilege of living this life I have, good or bad.
So the three most important qualities in life that I found most impactful is;
-Courage to push yourself out of your comfort zone. What’s unknown is always scary, but the results of doing what’s unknown result in a life changing experience.
-Love. Love your life. Love yourself. Embrace change. Life is so beautiful if you embrace it, the good and bad. The good in life is what makes you who you are. And the bad offers you experience to become better.
-Perspective, This quality goes hand in hand with the first two qualities because gaining perspective is how we become better human beings. Talk to and learn about the lives of the people in your community no matter how diverse, different, or strange they may be. Get to know your neighbors and how they find fulfillment in their own lives. You cannot grow as a person on planet Earth without understanding that even though someone else might not look like you, might not live like you, might not love like you do, we are all working towards the same thing, happiness and acceptance. Have a conversation with someone who is different from you. I promise, it will be worth it.
What has been your biggest area of growth or improvement in the past 12 months?
My biggest area of growth and self-improvement in the last year would be learning to love myself, accept myself, and forgive myself.
As I get older, and since becoming a father to two young boys and husband to my beautiful wife, the actions of my past weren’t always positive. Who I am today is not who I was as a younger man. I don’t like who I was as a young man. I regret a lot of things I did as a young man. I find myself upset with how I treated a lot of people as a young man and how I handled various situations that I encountered as a young man. If I could, I would turn back time so that I could knock some sense into the younger version of myself.
So my biggest obstacle in my own journey through this life is;
-Accepting who I am today is only because of who I was.
-Forgiving myself for the wrongs I made.
-And understanding that I am under no obligation to be the same person tomorrow that I was yesterday…
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.tiktok.com/@lausrota
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/laus_rota/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nick.rueda
- Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/nicklaus-rueda
Image Credits
Photo Images all shot by either myself, Andi Heath, and Ariel Kassulke.
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
