Meet Nicole Holmes

We recently connected with Nicole Holmes and have shared our conversation below.

Nicole, we’re thrilled to have you on our platform and we think there is so much folks can learn from you and your story. Something that matters deeply to us is living a life and leading a career filled with purpose and so let’s start by chatting about how you found your purpose.

Finding my purpose was not an easy thing. And I say that because I didn’t know I had a purpose, or that I needed to find my purpose. And I didn’t know simply because I had no idea on who I was. I knew the reflection in the mirror that I saw every day, but who I was behind the reflection was a mystery.

My journey to finding my purpose began in church. I would go to church every Sunday hoping that would be the day God saved me. Years and years went by, and nothing changed. I didn’t change. In fact, I got worse. I became this angry person. Well, to tell the truth, I was already angry. It just got worse. I was mad with the world, and with God. I wanted Him to do for me what I saw Him doing for others in the church and outside the church and He didn’t.

Although I was mad at God, something in me would not let me stop going to church. So, I continued week after week, month after month, year after year, and then one day everything changed. For the first time, I witnessed the praise dance ministry dancing in church. I was not familiar with this at all, but my spirit was drawn to it. Every time they ministered in dance, I was up out of my seat dancing along with them as if I had been to their rehearsal. Although I felt so good about the dancing, my inner self would tell me to sit down because I wasn’t worthy to even be standing up in church.
And then one day, a woman by the name of Carolyn Price, the church Dance Ministry Leader, (who I now call my Moses), approached me after service and said, “I’m waiting for you”. I responded with a puzzled look on my face “waiting on me?”. She said “yes, for you to join the dance ministry”. Well, I immediately said “oh no Ma’am, that’s not for me”. As she walked away, she said “I’ll wait”.

But something happened to me, just in that short conversation. A fire was ignited in me that I didn’t even know was there. My flesh tried to fight against it, but my spirit man wouldn’t let me dismiss it. Every time I saw them dance, the fire in me grew hotter and hotter. It was calling me. God was calling me, and for the first time in my life, I heard Him speak. It gives me chills just thinking about it. But I finally surrendered and the very next Sunday, I told Mrs. Carolyn I wanted to join the dance ministry.

During that short time in the ministry, I noticed I was being pulled in the spirit towards broken women. I could see it in them when I would dance. God would show it to me. He was showing me what He was preparing me for. And one day at rehearsal, not too long after I joined, I walked in the sanctuary and the music was already playing. As I walked in, something came over me, and I just started dancing. Mrs. Carolyn looked at me as if God was showing her something. She starred at me as if she was looking into my soul. She said to me “that’s your song you’ll minister to”. I was like, now I know this woman has got to be crazy because I just joined and now she wants me to do a solo dance.

I struggled with this all during rehearsal and after I left that night. I went home, showered and got in the bed. But I could not sleep. So, I played the song and found myself dancing in my bed. I was so confused as to what was happening to me, but I couldn’t stop it. The next thing I know, my spirit said get up and go dance. I could not fight the urge, so I got up, put on the only garment I had and started dancing. The more I danced, the freer I felt. By the end of the song, I had choreographed the whole song. I could not believe it. So, I did it again and recorded it. I sent the recording to Mrs. Carolyn, and she said just as quickly as she finished watching it, “you’re going to dance this Sunday”. I was so scared because I had only one more day to get it right.

Sunday came and my time had come. As Mrs. Carolyn stood before the congregation to introduce me, I started gathering my things to head towards the front. As I walked to the front a heaviness came upon me that tried to hold me back. But in that moment, I believe that God was showing me everything that had me bound and everything that He was about to free me from. He just need me to be in the right posture for Him to pull out of me what He called me to do. As the music started, I no longer saw or heard the people in the congregation. It was just me and God. Me and God danced that morning. And while we danced, He downloaded His will for my life, and it changed me forever. He showed me that my dance ministry would save the ones who was broken like I was. Now I understand why I had to go through the things I did. He needed me to be authentic before I went before His people. And on February 18, 2018, dance saved my life and gave me purpose. A few months later, I enrolled in GOLD Praise Dance School and became an ordained Minister of Dance.

I left my past behind and accepted God’s purpose for my life, and so can you. To God be the GLORY!!

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?

I was born and raised on the beautiful island of St. Croix U.S. Virgin Island. I will always be an Island Girl. However, I made my way to Georgia in 1993 to attend Albany State University. I graduated with my Bachelor of Science Degree in Criminal Justice. I went on to serve my community for 10 years as a Police Officer. I have since transitioned to my current career to the supply field as a Supply Technician. I furthered my education and obtained another degree in Business Logistics, and a certificate in Logistics and supply Chain Management. I was blessed with 2 beautiful children, a daughter Destiney and a son Kevin Jr, who are doing well for themselves and have families of their own.

My focus professionally, personally, and spiritually is that of service. Everything I’ve ever done, in between jobs, or volunteering has always been centered around service. By operating in one of my gifting area of exhortation, it makes service easier to do. For me to be a leader, I must be able to first be willing to serve. I believe it goes hand in hand. You can’t do one without the other.

I’ve taken my purpose, my gift, my calling, my desire to help broken women, and with God’s authority I turned it into a ministry called Beauty for Ashes. I am the founder of Beauty for Ashes 8 LLC, based in Georgia. God gave me the name for the ministry based on my life, and the different struggles and pain I had to face. It reminds me, that no matter what has happened, what’s happening now, or what will happen in the future, God will give me, give us, beauty for ashes. All we must do is believe in Him and trust the process. Believe that He knows what’s best for us. Believe that all things happen for a reason to produce purpose in us. So, this ministry consists of many things that all lead back to God. Everything I do, within this ministry must be God approved. Since creating it, God has allowed me to reach women in different ways. I am a current member of the Grateful Praise Dance Ministry, at my church St. James Missionary Baptist Church. I have been ministering in dance since 2017.

It gives me such joy to stand before God’s people and minister to them in a way that not only encourages them but points them to God. And that’s what it’s all about. Getting His people to return to Him or to want to get to know Him. I also had the opportunity and the privilege at church, to lead the teen girls dance group “Called to Dance”. Those were my babies. They’re all grown up and gone now doing great things.

I couldn’t even explain what that time with them was like. We didn’t just learn a song to dance. We studied God’s word so we could be freed to dance the right way. We had workshops, outings, and spiritual conversations, which made our ministry even better and stronger. Since my time leading the girls, a desire to teach dance has been placed on my heart. It has not manifested yet, but I know if God gave me the idea and the desire to do it, it will come to pass in His timing.

So, while waiting, I had a conversation with God, about what He wanted me to do with my ministry. He said to me “It’s not just in your dance, it’s in your words, SPEAK”. He wanted me to move pass my dancing and walk out the scripture in Revelation 12:11 (KJV) “And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb, and by the word of their testimony”. So, like He said, I had to speak it out of my mouth. But that was not going to be easy, but I did it anyway.

As He poured into me, I poured it out. First as journal entries then onto a laptop. I emptied my soul with words, but was I really speaking as He had instructed me too? Absolutely not, and He convicted me of it. And just so you know, delayed obedience or partial obedience is still disobedience. So, after God corrected me, I put pen to paper and wrote my first book, Beauty for Ashes – The Story Behind the Breakthrough. It was published in June of 2022. I thought that would be enough, but it wasn’t. God wanted more from me. He wanted me to speak it not just write about it. I needed to verbally share my testimony.

Ok God, I hear You. Shortly after that, I made a connection with Pastor Rachel Harris-Swan of Grow-In Stronger Faith Ministries. I’m not sure how we met, but the connection was divinely put together. Part of her ministry was also reaching broken women, which was right up my alley. She invited me to her event entitled Kingdom Women Table Talk and I have been going ever since.

We meet every 3rd Saturday of the month. And I have had the opportunity to either minister in dance, and or to speak to the women that shows up looking for God. Being able to serve in that capacity makes me feel like everything I went through was partly for this moment. I get to share my life, my story, my struggles, my pain, my setback, and most of all my comeback. And I get to do it in a safe space while helping other women find themselves just like I did.

My goal when I speak, is to reach at least one woman and bring them closer to God. I want them to know that life will happen but we’re not what happens to us, but it will make us who we are. I’m there to remind them and to be a living testimony, a living present witness that there’s purpose in our pain. The joy in this, is that I get to show them God and serve.

After serving at the table, I would often wonder how else I could help and reach others that do not come to the table. So, I started posting short public messages on FaceBook so anybody could read it and be encouraged. After doing the first message, I signed it ~Holmes Speaks~ (that had to be God). That signature stayed in my spirit and eventually I created my Podcast, and guess what I called it. Yeah, you guessed right Holmes Speaks.

I launched my podcast in February 2023 and aired my first episode in March 2023. I currently upload an episode every Wednesday on Spotify Podcast called ~HolmesSpeaks~. I talk about all things life, and I try to relate it to the bible. To name a few, I’ve touched on topics like The Dangers of Your Silence (my 1st episode), Soul Ties, Depression, Forgiveness, Surviving the Storm, Self-Confidence, Root Problems, Divorce, and many more interesting topics. Every discussion or conversation is something I’ve been through myself and have overcome. I believe to be authentic; your testimony must be tested first, then you can speak about it in a way that will encourage and help someone else.

I am currently on season 3 with 45 episodes published to date. I love doing what I do. Sometimes I wonder, what else can I talk about, but God always gives me something to discuss. I love knowing that at least one person, male or female will be encouraged after listening. I just want people to be ok. I want them to not have to suffer in pain or in silence as long as I did. I want to be a voice for those who have no words. A voice for those who’s wounds have held their story hostage. If I can help someone in anyway, that’s what I’ll do.

And one other thing I did do that I would have never in a million years thought I would do, was to speak in front of my church. My Pastor, Lawrence Knighton, saw something in me I didn’t, and he asked if I would do it. No time frame, just think about it and get back to him. I was shocked that he asked me, but I was also excited at the same time. So, I accepted the assignment, and I preached my first sermon entitled “What Does Your Faith Look Like” from the book of Mark chapter 5 (my favorite chapter in the bible by the way). I was scared when I walked up to the pulpit not knowing if I would be received well by some of the people who knew me before. Not only that, I’m not the typical hoop and holler preacher. But I did it anyway, and was on fire when I was done. The fire had been ignited and it was on from there.

As my journey continues, He is further preparing me for His work. I’ve completed my certification to become a Life Coach and will be working to bring that full vision to light. I have also completed writing my second book. I’m just waiting on God’s permission and the door to open for me to release it. If nothing else, I want you all to know and believe, that our life is not our own, and when we come into the realization that we are an answer to someone else’s prayers, we’ll learn to walk boldly in our purpose. To God be the Glory.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

The qualities, skills and or knowledge that was most impactful on my journey would be that of Resilience, Empathy, and Self-Accountability.

Before I came into the understanding of who I was and whose I was, I defined resilience as being able to just survive. And that was because of the way I was living. But as I grew older, and experienced life in a different way, I was able to better understand what being resilient was. According to definition, being resilient is the ability to adapt to and cope with difficult situations, or to recover from them quickly. Now that last part can be confusing to people who are in a rush to just get over things. If you get over something quickly that doesn’t make you resilient. What makes you resilient is not how you get “over” it but it’s how you get THROUGH it. When you get through something, it builds character, it gives you hope, it helps you deal with and manage stress in a healthier way. See, most of us want a microwave fix/answer, when God sometimes requires a crockpot experience.

Now being resilient doesn’t just happen overnight. It’s something that takes time to develop in you as you grow and mature in God. Noticed I said in God and not just growing in age and in the world. This ability comes from God and is magnified only if you believe and trust the process you’re going through. See there’s that word again “through”. Well, you can’t go through anything unless you’re willing to have your faith tested first. You can’t go through anything unless you change your mindset. None of this works if your mind set is not aligned with God’s will for your life. So, ask yourself, What do I believe? Is your mindset positive or negative? Are you a complainer or a person of gratitude? Do you believe in the power God has given you or are you living a defeated life?

Resilience is made stronger in the wilderness. And if you’ve never been in the wilderness, keep living, your time of testing will come. But when you’re in your wilderness season, you’re going to need to be resilient. It reminds you that God has walked you through your prior wilderness season before. That you made it through, that you found strength you didn’t know you had, that you had God’s provision and protection with you, and most of all, that there was peace in the chaos. Can you imagine having peace in the wilderness? It can happen. It happened for me. The more I built on being resilient going through the process, the more peace I had. All I needed was a memory. A memory of what God did before and the belief that He could do it again, and to be content if He didn’t do it.
Being resilient may sound difficult to do, but do it anyway, it is necessary and life changing. Some tips on how I built up my resilience, is I try to stay focus on what God says versus what I see in the natural. I try to keep a positive attitude even if it looks bad. That’s hard to do sometimes, but if I can do, so can you. And I pray for strength to remain resilient so God’s will can be done in my life so He can get the glory.

Another impactful skill on my journey, and one that is very near and dear to my heart is that of empathy. I believe if more people were genuinely empathetic the world would be a much better place. And I think if you go through enough in your life, and you wouldn’t want to see someone else go through the same, you have that character trait of empathy in you. It will allow you to understand other’s needs, concerns, and or perspectives that are not like your own. Now I’m not sure who said it, but I love the saying “meet people where they are”. That is one of the first steps in displaying empathy. But showing empathy is a desirable trait. You must want to show it. You must desire to feel what they feel. To be able to respond to someone else’s suffering.

Now because we’re different, showing empathy will not look the same for everyone. It drives connections with people. It puts you in someone else’s shoes. It forces you to listen rather than judge. It allows you to recognize the familiar in others, like certain things you may have gone through. But imagine, giving to someone what you would have wanted when you were going through. You can’t expect empathy from people, when you withhold it from others. It doesn’t work that way. God is not pleased with that. And I learned that the hard way when I went through different storms in my life. But it gave me a sense of new responsibility to God by helping someone else who is now going through like I did. You’ve got to pay it forward. It gives honor to God when you can genuinely show empathy to His children. Because if you don’t, you will rob God of His glory.

And the last skill that helped me on my journey and is still helping me today is self-accountability. See, if we tell the truth, more often than not, we love to try and hold others accountable for everything under the sun, but when it comes to ourselves, we’re silent. I used to be like that. I would judge everybody, blame everybody and point the finger at everybody except myself. Most of the time, if not all, I was the victim, so I didn’t see a need for any accountability. But one day, I asked God to show me what the problem was, and you know what He showed me. He showed me, ME. I was the problem. When God got His hands on me, and showed me the issue and convicted me, I had no choice but to develop self-accountability. Being able to do this, first changed my mindset. I saw things differently. It showed me the part I played in certain situations. Now I’m not saying that something won’t be done to you or against you, but somewhere somehow, you played a role in it, and it needs to be addressed. See, just like we love to call people out when we’re offended, we need to call ourselves out for what we did also. It goes both ways. (Quick side note on being offended, always keep in mind, an offense may occur, but to be offended is a CHOICE).

We must learn how to take responsibility for our actions. You are responsible for your life and the way you live it, the way you talk, the way you carry yourself, the way you behave, and the things you say and do. Remember, you are, or I should say, you should be a walking representative of God. There should be some residue on you that shows people that God is with you, so govern yourself accordingly.
Remember these three things. Build on your resilience through adversity with the strength of God. Display empathy whenever you can. And hold yourself to a higher standard through self-accountability, and when life knocks on your door in whatever capacity, you’ll be able to stand boldly in its face and not be moved.

Any advice for folks feeling overwhelmed?

When I feel overwhelmed the first thing, I used to do was play victim and call whoever I thought would co-sign on my pity party. This allowed me to go on and on and not have to do any self-evaluation on the situation. But now that I’ve matured in life, the first thing I do now is settle my spirit. I take a day to myself with no distractions, and I pinpoint the issue that is causing me to be off balance. Once I acknowledge it, my next step is to figure out why it happened in the first place. I work it out in my mind and then I give it God.
It’s easy to get overwhelmed when we overextend ourselves to people and things. We take on more than we can handle, and it becomes too much for us and it may even take a toll on our mental, physical, and our spiritual state.
My advice to you is to ask yourself these few questions before you agree to do anything. Why am I doing this? What’s the purpose for doing this? Did I consult God first? Is what I’m doing beneficial to others or just myself? Is what I’m doing pleasing to God? What are the possible outcomes if I do this? We need to be asking ourselves these types of questions and more, so we won’t fall victim to being overwhelmed.

I find that when I go off task and I involve myself in things that have nothing to do with me, I become overwhelmed. When you take on assignments that are not yours, you become overwhelmed. When you do too much, and you’re stretched everywhere when will you have time for yourself? When will you be able to do what you’re supposed to be doing?

We have got to get to the place in life where we put ourselves first without feeling shame or guilty about it. There’s nothing selfish about taking care of yourself. Because if we can’t give it to ourselves first, how can we give it to anyone else. We should always consider our well-being and mental state in that moment and how it will affect both of those things later on. And if you constantly live in an overwhelming state of mind, you will lose focus on what you should be doing, you will make poor decisions, you will become frustrated, irritated, and eventually very angry. Ask me how I know. Been there done that, got the t-shirt and the trophy on the wall.
So, to avoid being overwhelmed, do these few things. Try prioritizing, set boundaries for yourself and stick to it (that’s a must), focus on one thing at a time, be mindful of how you’re feeling, if needed, delegate what’s on your plate, and take time to rest, reset, and relax. Take time for yourself. You matter. And if it’s just too much practice this one thing. Saying NO. Say no and meant it. Say no and be unapologetic about it. Say no and stick to it. And please know that NO is a complete sentence, and it requires no explanation.

Keep every part of you in mind before you take on anything. Seek God first and I guarantee you’ll be overwhelmed a whole lot less.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.beautyforashes8.com
• Facebook: HolmesSpeaks
• Youtube: Nicole Holmes – Beauty for Ashes
• Other: Spotify – Podcast HolmesSpeaks

Image Credits

Professional Headshot – credit to Mr. Jamel Overstreet of Overstreet Media Services

Book Cover Photo – credit to Mr. Kevin Malone of MDK Productions & Photography

Podcast Photo Profile Design – credit to Mrs. Shakielah Nixon of Z~n~Z Custom Designz