We were lucky to catch up with Nicole Pertillar recently and have shared our conversation below.
Nicole, we’re thrilled to have you sharing your thoughts and lessons with our community. So, for folks who are at a stage in their life or career where they are trying to be more resilient, can you share where you get your resilience from?
Resilience: The ability to adapt and overcome challenges. Resilience in my life has developed through countless number of obstacles that I had to overcome. Each one of them made me stronger as I worked through how not to fold under the weight of difficulties. One of those times stands out right now.
I was working as an Intensive in Home Family Therapist ( a very intense position) where I held sessions with clients in their homes, schools, and communities, meaning my young clients were in my car. One particular day, my therapy partner and I took a set of sisters out for a community session and ended up in car accident.
We ran head on into a cinderbrick house!!! Everyone was fine except me! I experienced debilitating pain. The issue was I tried to work through it. I tried to keep up with the same crazy schedule I had prior to the accident. The company that I had wasn’t as sympathetic as I would have liked and I had to make a decision. Most people were telling me how it would be a mistake to stop working and lose all of the licensure hours I was accumulating. The questions were, “What about all that time?” “What will you do for money?” Also, the thought of leaving my families was breaking my heart.
One day shortly after the accident, I had an aha moment. Was I going to keep going with an insanely busy schedule because it felt like I should or was I going to prioritize my wellness so that I could be whole in spirit, mind, and body.
I chose ME! I chose to leave my role and only focus on school. Throughout the next 6months or so after the car accident, some life transforming lessons were highlighted to me. I learned that self-love is a powerful tool of resilience and restoration. During the time of my “forced pause” from life, there were three major ways that I needed to show myself self-love. 1. Self-Care 2. Self-Advocacy 3. Self-Pursuit
1. Self-Care – I had to create space to treat myself wellness, calm my nerves, and facilitate my healing
2. Self-Advocacy – I had to set boundaries and stand up for what I needed or even walk away from what wasn’t serving me
3. Self-Pursuit – I had time to realize that it was dangerous to get stuck in the busyness of doing a bunch of good things instead of pouring in your dreams and purpose.
The car accident created this “forced pause” that made me lay down, focus, and reevaluate. Now, I understand that I don’t…no can’t wait for “forced pauses”. I need to get real about intentional pauses.
The other thing I noticed is that I’d already been doing this pattern of self-care, self-advocacy, and self-pursuit all of my life through all of the obstacles I’ve had to overcome in life. I was doing it intentionally, I just didn’t have the words. I did it through each heart wrenching loss and deep disappointment I’ve experienced.
I now call this Process the “Power of the Pause”. It is this process of taking time for stillness, mindfulness, and journaling to fill up my spirit and truly focusing on everything good that helped me come back from some some of the most difficult challenges.
Practice the Power of the Pause Intentionally…Give yourself the gift of PAUSE on a regular basis. It can truly shift you.
Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
Hey There! I’m honored you’re here and grateful to “meet” you! Let me share a bit about who I am and the different roles I play in helping individuals, teams, and organizations make the necessary shifts to fulfill purpose and execute vision. As an artist, I tend to bring arts & creativity into my processes and strategies because well, it’s just powerful! My journey with creating has been one of healing, restoration, coming into authenticity and more. I want other to experience the freedom I’ve found through the creative process.
Creativity has the ability to facilitate healing for individuals, the creation of efficient systems in organizations, and the development of transformational unifying collaborations in communities.
As a Wholeness Advocate: I am passionate about creating room for women leaders, healers, & creatives to have safe spaces of refuge & community to fill themselves up so they are able to show up whole & confidently for the people they’re called to serve. I encourage, equip, & empower women who consistently pour into others, to shift their priority to pouring into themselves. The reason for this is so that they can show up healthy & WHOLE as the best version of themselves.
I absolutely helping women learn to prioritize themselves. I also help them to recognize that prioritizing their health and wellbeing is not ignoring the needs of others, it’s simply making sure you’re at the table to get filled along with the other people in your life.
I am incredibly excited about the recent launch of my membership: The WELL: Self-Care Community Support Group. People can join the membership from the home page of my website. www.NicolePertillar.com
Also, I am truly anticipating the launch of my podcast @thatplantlifepodcast where my co-host and I will be talking about plant tips and how plants and nature are so beneficial to self-care and mental wellness. I LOVE plants. I currently have about 80. So, this podcast is something truly special to me
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Flexibility- The Ability to Pivot/ Being able to pivot without much hesitation has been critical in my journey of becoming who I am today. To those who may not be flexible and are challenged with change, I want to encourage you to get very familiar with The Power of the Pause so that when it’s time to pivot you’re able to do so more from a place of ease and flow.
Creativity & Critical Thinking – Thinking out of the box and the ability to see things from different perspectives and various vantage points. Do not take things at face value. Ask questions. Allow yourself to be challenged and questions without taking it personally.
Inner Work or Self-Awareness/Healing/Emotional Intelligence – Seeking support through trusted mentors, coaches, therapists were extremely instrumental in my process of becoming. But the absolute most important thing, the foundation from which all other aspects of my healing emerged was from my relationship with Jesus and the power of the Holy Spirit. There is nothing better than the strength I gained from prayer and prophetic insights.
My advice to those wanting to improve on anything I’ve listed here is to:
1. Ask God for what you want.
2. Implement the Power of the Pause into your life on a regular basis. Be intentional about what you do during you pauses.
3. Journal/Track your life experiences and look back at it periodically with the intent of looking for areas you can improve or expand upon.
4. Envision- Take time periodically to envision what you need to move forward
How would you describe your ideal client?
My ideal clients are women 35yrs old and older who are feeling like it’s too late for them. Or they’re struggling with having a full picture of who they are.
My ideal clients are:
Looking for consistent support
Entrepreneurs or Aspiring Entrepreneurs
Women who are looking to reduce stress and anxiety
Looking for support with time management
Creative Spirit
Love plants or desire to start bing a plant mom
Ready for change
Self-care
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.nicolepertillar.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nicolepertillar/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/NicolePertillarCoach
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicolepertillar/
Image Credits
Jeffrey Jackson of J Scott Photos
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
