Meet Nicole Scimone

We recently connected with Nicole Scimone and have shared our conversation below.

Nicole , we’re thrilled to have you on our platform and we think there is so much folks can learn from you and your story. Something that matters deeply to us is living a life and leading a career filled with purpose and so let’s start by chatting about how you found your purpose.

Right around the time I was filling out my college applications, my dad was going through a stem cell transplant for leukemia. To say that whole experience changed me, is a gross understatement. Seeing my dad come back from a treatment that could have killed him, did something to my brain chemistry. I felt like I had witnessed something so heartbreaking in yet miraculous and inspiring. Before he came home from the hospital, my mom encouraged me to write him a letter, one that would lift his spirits, because he certainly needed it. Writing him that letter, and watching him read it in our living room is a feeling I will never forget. The impact of that entire experience stayed with me and I think maybe the seeds for my future were planted right then and there.

From a very young age I used to search high and low for my purpose. It felt like an all-out quest. What was I meant to do in this world? Who would I become? But how do you find something when you’re not sure what you are looking for? The only thing I knew for sure, was that I wanted to make an impact.

When I went off to college and had to declare a major, I felt as if I was making the biggest decision of my life. I had a growing interest in psychology and I was excited to explore my human services degree. I felt like I was looking behind a metaphorical door each time something interested me. Could this be the thing I am meant to do? What about this door? I couldn’t make up my mind to save my life, no matter how much encouragement and support people gave me.

I thought that when I found my purpose, the reason for my being on this earth, that there would be fireworks and flashing neon signs. I’m not sure where this romanticized idea came from, but the feeling was deep in my bones. Each time I looked behind one of these doors, there was no spark, and the discouragement began to grow. I would envy people who knew exactly what they wanted to do. I would have given anything to have that all knowing.

Well! I was about to get a nice shove in the direction of my beloved purpose quite ruthlessly. My dad passed away when I was twenty-four and those seeds that were planted years prior, really took root. I now HAD to make an impact. I felt almost instantly that I would do something with this grief. But what? And how? I still had such a long way to go on my own healing journey. This loss was so devastating to me and my family. I wanted something good to come out of all this heartbreak.

I would spend the next ten years deep down a corporate path, working jobs that I truly wasn’t passionate about. Jobs that quite honestly drained the light right out of my soul. That may sound dramatic, but it’s true. I may have been unsure what I wanted to do with my life, but I was certain this was not it. Each day I drove into work this burned in the back of my mind. Thank goodness for my family and coworkers that helped keep my spirits up throughout these years!

As the years went on, I began to listen to hours of inspirational podcasts and my love for writing also started to blossom. I created a blog and wrote inspirational stories about my grief journey and it really lit a fire in me. All of a sudden a new direction began to appear. It was like I was following breadcrumbs leading me somewhere. I felt so pulled in this direction, and I listened to my intuition telling me to keep going.

I started to explore my options. I felt like I was playing a game of hot and cold. Here we go, we’re getting warmer now! After starting my own blog, I found my way to grief coaching, non-profit organizations, and public speaking. I would spend hours researching a path for myself. And slowly but surely it all started to materialize. I didn’t have all the pieces of the puzzle figured out, in fact I still don’t. But I DID have this all knowing that my search was over. Ah, peace!
My plan forward wasn’t quite ready, but I was ready. I quit my corporate job with my heart set on making an impact in the grief space.

I used to think our purpose had to be tied to a particular job, a title. Now I know that no matter what job title I hold, my purpose is quite simple – I want to make an impact and help others heal through something I struggled to navigate. That’s it.

Sometimes the universe is a little twisted. How can something that brings me total joy and fulfillment come from something that caused me so much pain? Hindsight is a funny thing, and I do feel peace in how tragically and poetically complicated this is. I truly don’t have all the answers, but grief has taught me to accept the dualities of life. And if we can find purpose within our deepest pain, well then anything is possible.

And what I do know to be true is this. It doesn’t have to make sense, the things we love to do. And you don’t have to search high and low for it. Your purpose isn’t something that YOU find…rather IT finds you. It finds you in the whispers of your inner voice, the nudges of your intuition, your interests and curiosities, and in the things that light your soul on fire. Or sometimes it finds you amongst your deepest wounds.

What is meant for you, will find you. One way or another. Believe in that, with all your heart.

Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?

I currently work part- time for two non-profit organizations. One supports young adult cancer survivors and the other supports children and teens grieving the loss of a parent. I spend my time doing community engagement and program coordinating. This work is incredibly fulfilling and I have met so many wonderful people and have had so many amazing experiences.

I am also growing a grief coaching business. I see clients virtually 1:1 and help them navigate the difficult journey of losing a loved one. Grief can derail our lives in so many ways, so we work together to find forward motion and find that spark in their lives again. I am very passionate about coaching and I would love more people to know about this amazing resource.

This year my focus is on hosting writing workshops in my area, as well as getting more involved in my community in the grief space. I am also open to public speaking opportunities where I can share my journey through grief and empower others to boldly move through their own adversities.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

Positive Attitude & Gratitude – I like to think I am hard wired to find the silver linings. My mom in particular modeled this for me my whole life, especially after we lost my dad. She was always finding things to be grateful for, despite all her pain. Having any sort of gratitude or positive attitude after you lose someone you love is incredibly hard to do. She inspired me to still be grateful for all the wonderful things we still had in our lives. I’m thankful I was able to build upon this foundation as I got older. Gratitude is a practice, and it’s a muscle you have to work at each and every day.

You can take all your negative thoughts and self-doubts and choose to only think of the positive outcomes. Believe that there is good out there and that you are deserving of it. If you can figure that out, I really think you can go after any dream that is calling to you. If you can train yourself to only see the good around you, then the good is all you will see, and then the possibilities are endless. Ask yourself- what if it all works out?

Authenticity- Please go out there and show up as your truest self, and not who society thinks you ought to be. I think we spend too much of our time wearing a mask, but when you take it off and speak your truth, everything changes. Who did you want to be in life before the world put expectations on you? Before we all tried fitting in? What did you enjoy doing when you were a kid? What would you love to do if given the chance?

We spend most of our lives trying to gain validation from our peers and meet countless expectations of others. When you turn that around and only focus on the life YOU want for yourself, that is a total game changer. It’s hard not to people please and put everyone else’s needs before your own. But when it comes to creating the life of your dreams- this is essential. Strip away all the beliefs that are not your own- what do YOU want? And what do YOU have to say?

Courage – This one might have been the most difficult for me and I still work on it. Being bold and brave is something I thought only other people had inside themselves. Have the courage to believe in yourself and know you can do hard and scary things. If we aren’t willing to change our own reality, then nothing will change. When you see how simple that is, I think it makes it easier to move.

Stepping outside of our comfort zone is so incredibly scary but that is where you will experience the most growth and transformation. It will bring you closer to that idealized future version of yourself. I have stepped outside of my comfort zone more this past year, than I have in my entire 35 years. And each day I do, I feel closer than ever to the person I want to be.

So go out there and do the thing that scares you. Your future depends on it!

Okay, so before we go we always love to ask if you are looking for folks to partner or collaborate with?

Ever since embarking on this path I have wanted nothing more than to find other kindred spirits who are looking to help others heal. The women I have already met and be-friended have inspired me. I enjoy collaborating with people who understand adversity and live with a great deal of authenticity in their own lives. They are the healers, the creatives, the dreamers, the truth seekers, the mystics, the open-minded genuine souls who want to share their own gifts with the world.

I would love to collaborate in a writing workshop, a grief workshop, group grief coaching sessions, in-person retreats, wellness events, networking events and any sort of public speaking collaboration. And more importantly I am looking to create community and connection where we can all grow and work on our missions together!

My website:
www.nicolescimone.com

My Instagram:
@nicolescimone_

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.nicolescimone.com
• Instagram: nicolescimone_
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-scimone-83578696/