Meet Nikayla Benbow

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Nikayla Benbow. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Hi Nikayla , appreciate you sitting with us today to share your wisdom with our readers. So, let’s start with resilience – where do you get your resilience from?

Wow, let me first start by saying the question selection has me in a chokehold!! Such amazing questions that fit perfectly with my journey. However, this particular question stood out to me the most.

I would honestly say my resilience was birthed out of multiple seasons of suffering, hardships, losses, disappointments, frustrations, and more. Through the colorful journey I call my life, I have learned the beauty of the scripture Philippians 4:11–13 (NLT):

“Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.”

Resilience for me comes from the Lord and Him alone. When we think of trauma and hardships, we instantly see everything that is wrong in front of us and how it makes us feel—which is understandable, because we are human and emotions are real. However, the Holy Spirit has revealed to me that there is more than what we can see right in front of us, and if we can just readjust our focus, we’ll be able to see more clearly and understand the “why” behind the hardships and disappointments.

With this wisdom and knowledge, you then—almost without even realizing it—find yourself whispering so gently, “thank You for the suffering,” because in those moments you realize it had to happen in order for you to get to the next position.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?

A little about me: I am just a girl who fell in love with Jesus and has been changed ever since! Growing up in the “church world” has its advantages and disadvantages. You’re told how to dress, what to say and not to say, how to be, and who to be in order for God to use you. I didn’t realize how much lack I had in truly knowing the heart of God concerning me until I started going through different problems and difficult seasons throughout my life.

However, when God came and began to show me who He is and how He loves me—no matter what I have or don’t have, no matter how I look or don’t look, no matter what I do or don’t do—I started to walk a little differently and show up differently in rooms. Because of His love, I was able to birth my nonprofit, The Safe Place MVMT, my podcast Safe Conversations w/ Nikayla, and publish my first book, With Him I Am Safe: 7-Day Devotional.

Through these different avenues, God has graced me to now be to others what He has been to me: a light and a beacon of hope. I always tell anyone who is new to joining us or just feeling things out that all of my platforms are intended to encourage everyone to come and be present with God, while doing it with community and living out the true calling over their lives.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

The three skills that have impacted my journey—and honestly still do—are always being compassionate, always being vulnerable, and never forgetting to be transparent. In a world where these three skill sets are often frowned upon or silenced, you have to hold on to your why and never let anyone change that or take it from you.

With these skills, you will face a lot of opposition because they expose the inability in others to take accountability. However, keeping this skill set at the forefront of who you are will birth true friendships, long-lasting love with yourself, and a stronger relationship with God.

What is the number one obstacle or challenge you are currently facing and what are you doing to try to resolve or overcome this challenge?

You want to know what my biggest obstacle is… it is myself. Somehow, I managed to believe—what at least seemed like reality in my mind—that I had to reach a certain level of followers, a certain social status, or a certain level of success before I could become the woman God created me to be. Because of that belief, I would talk myself out of opportunities if I felt the opportunity was bigger than what I thought I could offer. I would shy away in rooms and almost seem invisible when other people were present—people I thought fit the “criteria” of what a successful person looks like. I would go silent and act as if I didn’t have the knowledge or even the advice for a scenario, opportunity, or topic that was brought to me.

All of these behaviors were birthed out of imposter syndrome. I convinced myself that because the traumas of my past were so great in size, there was no possible way I could outshine the darkness of them—that they would always follow me, always remind me of what I can’t do or what I would never receive.

But here’s what I have to say in response to that negative thought process and behavior: God showed me that there is more inside of me than I could ever imagine or ever allowed myself to see. And if I would just partner with Him in healing, and begin to see myself the way He sees me, there would be nothing I wouldn’t be able to achieve.

Now, someone may ask, “What does that even look like?” At first, I was the same way—like, excuse me, God? But He began showing me through reflection time and journaling that the only way I can truly grow and become the woman He has called me to be… is that I have to heal.

I tried so hard to avoid healing because healing is very nasty. It hurts. It opens wounds. It reminds you and shows you the flaws within your own heart. It reveals the ugliness inside that no one knows about. And with that realization can come condemnation and embarrassment for even seeing the person you’ve become.

However, I can say this with confidence: the only way an egg can be used is if it’s broken. Healing is a requirement in order for you to step into who you were designed to be.

So I had to learn how to get out of my own way and allow God to lead me through everything. Sometimes it’s not the enemy…
it’s the inner me.

Contact Info:

Image Credits

Red Pen Edits LLC
Predestined For You LLC

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