Meet Ray Buffer

We were lucky to catch up with Ray Buffer recently and have shared our conversation below.

Ray, thanks so much for taking the time to share your insights and lessons with us today. We’re particularly interested in hearing about how you became such a resilient person. Where do you get your resilience from?
Recently I made some mistakes and bad choices that became a scandal in the press, despite the fact that I am not a celebrity. I shoplifted. The news of this was broadcast on TMZ, and many other sites. In the time since, I plead guilty, paid restitution, did some community service and perhaps most importantly, addressed the things that were wrong inside of me. My reputation was tarnished and I lost friends, agents, and jobs. To this day, I still don’t know if when I lose a job, or don’t get cast, if it is due to my abilities – or the damage to my image. I faced a choice to either hide from the world and succomb to anxiety and shame, or to choose to survive and move forward despite the harsh forces pushing back at me. I decided to survive. I think that my resiliance comes from the research I had done many years ago into suicide when I helped to produce the documentary Rats & Bullies. The topic of the film was female relational aggression (bullying) and the ramifications of suicide on those you leave behind. I think the lessons I learned from creating that film, helped me to put into perspective my own challenges. I also received an outpouring of support from friends who know my character and forgave me my missteps. Baby steps are what I strive to take every day in hopes of building forward momentum.

Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
I enjoy being part of the great storytelling machine that is film. My training is in musical theatre – and while in Florida for the first 30 years of my life I worked for theaters and theme parks regularly. When I came to California in 1999 I had to start over – and worked as a background actor and eventually worked in arts management for other people’s companies and later for my own. I realized from producing and directing that I did not like holding the reigns of a production that I was also in. It was too distracting. I prefer now to focus on being the best actor I can be. Because I am a big and tall guy, there are types of roles that I am cast in more frequently. Santa Claus, Russian mobsters, western villains, aliens and creatures are always a joy to play. I particularly enjoy playing roles in which I am covered with SFX make-up and prosthetics. I believe it is a greater challenge to perform those roles, but my theatre training helps to compensate for having to emote through the layers of latex and body paint. I recently wrapped on a film with the working title, “Expired” about a girl who while tripping on an edible, hallucinates when entering a restaurant kitchen. I got to play Gup, a chef that looks very fish-like. Professional make–up artist, Alexa Cantarini created a look for me that allowed me to keep my beard, albeit with the addition of some live moss. I also recently appeared as the alien villain, Coman Ra’ in Adam O’Neill’s “Implosion, and the creepy antagonist, The Grid in Mila Perkins’ “The Rising” – which had its world premiere at the Studio City International Film Festival, on my birthday, September 2, 2023 at 4:30PM, and will next screen at the Silicon Beach Film Festival on September 14 at 9:30pm inside the beautiful TCL Chinese Theatre.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
If you give up, you’ll never win. Find a balance that works for you. If I can keep my head above water, pay my rent and bills and keep doing things I enjoy – then I am satiated. At some point you have to create a pipeline of work, and have faith that the pipeline will provide as you continue to feed it. Support your friends, treat people you work with well, and remember how lucky you are to do what you enjoy.

Is there a particular challenge you are currently facing?
Self-sabotage is a danger. I think that I had some triggers that instigated my own downward sprial, but hubris is a poison. When things are going well, sometimes you can become your own worst enemy. I think its important to address your own mental health – exercize good self care, and do the things that you need to do to make sure you are balanced. In terms of my reputation, the only way I can improve it is to continue to work, and try to do good things.

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