Meet Richard Roseland

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Richard Roseland. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Richard, thrilled to have you on the platform as I think our readers can really benefit from your insights and experiences. In particular, we’d love to hear about how you think about burnout, avoiding or overcoming burnout, etc.

For those of us working in compassion-driven fields, burnout is inevitable. We see too much day in and day out that leads to our minds and our souls taking on burdens that we were never meant to carry. Whether it is seeing physical traumas in the ER as a nurse or doctor or hearing the details of physical or sexual abuse as a social worker or foster parent, these horrific scenes are forever imbedded in your mind and imprinted on your soul. It’s too much! As we take on this secondary trauma or experience first-hand trauma from those who we are trying to help, it leads to exhaustion. What many people don’t realize is how much that impacts our physical, emotional, and spiritual health. Overtime, it leads to burnout and many times to the desire to step away from their careers altogether!

For me personally, I have experienced burnout multiple times. I do not think that it is something that can be avoided the first time, as it is an entirely new experience and we all think that we can handle way more than we actually can! Many times, we stop there, allowing ourselves to go to those places of “I can’t take any more…this is too much!” But there can be true beauty in working through the burnout. I do not believe it is ever something that you can necessarily “overcome”, but it is something that can be worked through by establishing healthy rhythms. As those healthy rhythms dimenish over time, it can lead to new seasons of burnout and exhaustion, but as your memory alerts you to being in an unhealthy place again, it allows you to see the need to implement healthy rhythms again.

There are three things that I think are vital to overcoming burnout.

First, it is necessary to set aside time and space. Decades ago, we would have spent hours with ourselves in the fields. This allowed for time to process our thoughts, emotions, and experiences. It also meant that we spent time in creation to experience beautiful sunrises, green forests, and the dirt under our feet. Whenever burnout is on hand, I have noticed that I try to enclose myself in my office or home, and bury myself in work or entertainment on my phone, computer, or TV. This is the exact opposite of what our bodies and spirits crave…time to spend with our thoughts and time in nature.

Second, we need to spend time in community. Before TVs, computers, and cellphones, evenings were spent as a family, telling stories, playing games, and reading together. It was a time to be in community with each other and truly connect in deep and intimate ways. Whenever we are in an unhealthy rhythm, we start to listen to the lie of “It’s to exhausting to be around others” or “It’s much more relaxing just to watch a TV show.” But the truth is that being in community with others is a salve for our souls. I won’t lie, it does feel burdensome at times to take that initial step, but most of the time you will walk away from those get-togethers more filled than when you got there. We were truly created for community.

Third, it is essential to take time to rest. This can be both time daily, as well as taking a weekly Sabbath day. In the Bible, it lists taking a Sabbath day (day of rest) on par with not murdering or stealing. But for many of us, we probably won’t kill somebody in our lifetime, but we will definitely adopt a 7-day work week! Taking one day of rest each week can be such a life-changer and can prevent burnout like nothing else. It does take preparation to make sure that your house is clean, clothes are washed, food is cooked, and any work-related emergencies are taken care of. But having a true day of rest with no worries is extremely beautiful and life-giving. The first rest day you take can feel strange if you haven’t practiced it, but try it for a month and it will be the one day of the week that you most look forward to! It can be a great time to read, pray, sleep, be in nature, be with family/friends, play games, or do anything else that brings you joy.

If you are in a compassion-driven field, it will be impossible to not take on some secondary trauma that can lead to compassion fatigue and burnout. But you can take a few steps towards healthy rhythms that allow you to free yourself of those burdens and focus on yourself.

Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?

I am a missionary to the foster community in Memphis. I have been a missionary with Orphanos for the past 18 years, serving in Mexico at an orphanage, in Ecuador at a school for low-income students, internationally doing pastoral care for directors of orphan ministries, and now in Memphis, TN to the foster care community.

I never planned or dreamed about what I am doing now whenever I was young, but it has truly been beautiful to see how God has guided me and prepared me for each step. In Mexico, He opened my eyes to see the humanity and pain of each child living at the orphanage, allowing me to build deep friendships with the kids. I also was able to learn Spanish through each mistake that the kids gladly took as opportunities to make fun of me! In Ecuador, He allowed me to discover how to make learning fun and to show my students the beauty and excitement of reading and math. It was also there that we first opened our home for foster kids without knowing what we were doing. When I was providing pastor care in many different countries around the world, I was able to become a Spiritual Director and become more curious about my faith and who I am. In Memphis, I have now been able to discover how pieces of the puzzle in foster care can fit together in such an amazing way!

As a missionary to the foster community, my focus now is on finding the different pieces of the puzzle and trying to fit them together. There are so many churches, organizations, and individuals with big hearts and passion for the children in our city. There are usually around 1,200 kids in foster care in Memphis and countless others in kinship care (living with a relative who is caring for them). My goal is to bring together resources, both human resources and physical resources, to meet the needs of the children in our city. There are so many incredible people who are showing up!

If you are someone in Memphis who wants to get involved, I highly encourage you to come to join one of the monthly lunches at MIFAM (Memphis Interfaith Foster and Adoption Ministries) to see how you can get involved! (www.mifam901.com)

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

1. To say “no”: As a people-pleaser, this is hard and still something that I have to deal with. Someone once shared with me that every time that you say “yes” to something, you are also saying “no” to a multitude of other things. So that “yes” to a task at work is also a “no” to playing time with your kids or a “no” to spending time with a spouse or friend. Becoming more aware of what I say “yes” to, especially as I serve multiple ministries in Memphis, is still a learning process!

2. Doing things with excellence: This was something that was taught to me in Ecuador by Ron Stiff, and continues to be something that directs my decisions. If you aren’t going to do something with excellence, then don’t do it! It doesn’t mean that you won’t do it in the future, but wait until you can do it in a way that glorifies God and isn’t just half-baked.

3. Never stop learning: Don’t worry…I’m not telling you that you have to be constantly enrolled in college! But I do encourage you to continue to learn. This can be through reading, podcasts or videos. This can be through putting yourself in uncomfortable situations to learn new skills. Or it can be in befriending or serving someone who is hurting. All of these allow you to learn a little more about the world around us!

Thanks so much for sharing all these insights with us today. Before we go, is there a book that’s played in important role in your development?

One book which has been my favorite over the past few years is called Holy Listening by Margaret Guenther. As I was being trained as a spiritual director, this book was one that was required reading, but was also my favorite. It was so impactful to see how we can come alongside others who are suffering or dealing with trauma to listen well and notice things that they might not be able to perceive. Through asking good questions and truly listening, we can help those around us to be curious about the situation going on around them and discover how God is present even in the midst of the most painful circumstances.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://roselands.wixsite.com/missions/blog
• Other: https://www.mifam901.com