Meet Robyn Vogel

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Robyn Vogel a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Robyn , thank you so much for joining us. You are such a positive person and it’s something we really admire and so we wanted to start by asking you where you think your optimism comes from?
Despite growing up with a mother who was ill from the time I was 6 years old (until she died when I was 10 years old), I developed a sense of optimism. Most people who have experienced as much loss as I have do not generally feel optimistic. But despite losing my mom at such a young age, my dad only 20 years later and my partner when I was in my early 40s, I continue to say that life keeps getting better and better.

For one thing, I’m grateful for my health and well being. I did not follow in either of my parents’ footsteps. I chose excellent self care and continue to, I don’t ignore warning signs and I have a positive attitude about my health and how long I’ll be on the planet.

I learned to think positively and shift negative thinking through spiritual practice, and neuroplasticity tools. Any and all healing I have done on myself has brought an enthusiasm for life and all that can be experienced her. I believe that anything and everything is possible and continue to shift any limited thinking to the awareness of infinite possibility.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
I want to answer this question in the plural. It’s not that there was one person who has been the most helpful in helping me overcome challenges and build the mastery I have today, it’s that a community of life-minded people has supported me throughout my entire life. When I was drowning in grief in my pre-teen years, it was my friends who got me through that most difficult time. I was lost until I found a community of like-minded teens and adults in the synagogue that my family and friends were connected to. Once I met them, I stopped feeling different. I stopped feeling isolated. I saw that everyone was struggling with something and I felt loved and held in my own struggle. It also gave me space to have fun and be a kid again.

Later on after college, and a few years of wandering around again, I found more community of like-minded people. These folks were my rock during another round of tender grief and loss. Having support, people who understood what I was going through and even if they didn’t, showed up with an open heart….this kind of love is life-changing.

I built the skill of receiving. I learned how to ask for what I wanted and receive support in exchange. I learned to listen to others, to be with my own pain and to heal. I learned what it meant to truly thrive and I’m grateful now for the successful life and business I have as a result of such unwavering support and guidance.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
My favorite 3 words are: Allowance, Vulnerability and Safety. When we are in allowance of all there is in life, even things that feel like challenges can flow with ease. Allowance means we are in allowance of all that is brought to us, not just the “good stuff.” Being in allowance means more peace, less struggle.

Vulnerability and safety go together….one providing for the other. I learned a long time ago, when I was a teenager, that safety comes from within. I had looked for it outside of myself but when my mother died and life felt terrifying, the only place I could look for help was inside. That may seem like a highly developed skill for a 10 year old but because I was eagerly and fiercely looking outside for help – and not receiving it from the adults around me – I think I did the natural thing – I looked inside. I learned some tools that helped me relax and feel better. Over time I came to see that safety is in “internal job.”

When we feel safe, we can be vulnerable and being vulnerable means being real and authentic. When we are being our authentic selves, we feel accepted and loved for who we are.

This is really what we are all striving for in this life – to be understood, seen and accepted for who we are. Over time we also learn that this is an inside job as well.

My advice for folks who are early in their journey is to find a mentor or guide, could be an older relative or friend, and listen. We tend to think we know everything when we are younger but life experience is not for nothing. When I listen with an open heart to the wisdom around me, it invites me into a better a version of myself.

All the wisdom you’ve shared today is sincerely appreciated. Before we go, can you tell us about the main challenge you are currently facing?
After I lost my partner, I didn’t know if I was ever going to be able to love again or even live a happy life.

Truth is, it wasn’t just my partner. I was crushed as a child and young adult after losing both of my parents way too early.

Experiencing devastating loss so early in my life created fear, anxiety, and long-lasting grief that made most days a challenge.

Today, I can honestly say that my life is filled with love and joy. I went from feeling like I must’ve done something wrong to knowing how amazing I am; and what a contribution I am to the world. I have ncredible intimacy in my life. I know the Universe is on my side.

I learned how to THRIVE and not be stuck in survival as so many are.

After growing up in a family with dysfunctional dynamics and experiencing profound loss, and finding a path to a life of unbridled joy, love, and peace, I am passionately dedicated to creating more Love in the world.

I invite you to join me on this deeply healing and sacred path that I call COME BACK TO LOVE.

I have been doing this tantra-based work for 20 years now bringing together the world of psychology with the body, spiritual practice and intimacy skills. Tantra is likely not what you think it is as most people think it’s only about sex. But Tantra is so much more than that. It’s a deep invitation into the body, to your breath, to movement and to connection with yourself and others. But the connection with yourself comes first.

Come Back To Love offers workshops, classes and destination retreats where you can dive deeply into your own healing and come out the other side with a new perspective. Most people fall in love with themselves after so many years of disparaging comments and being downright mean to themselves. When you fall in love with you, so much is possible because that optimism, the good energy you have attracts good things to you as well. Whether it’s a partner you are looking for, an amazing job or gobs of money, you feeling amazing about yourself and your life, brings amazing things to you.

20 years of work has culminated recently in a 6-month course called Heal Your Heart. It’s this program that bring together all of the tools learned via the Come Back To Love approach. Psychotherapy isn’t enough to heal what’s holding you back at your core. Heal Your Heart takes you on a journey into your soul, body and heart to heal what’s in the way of you experiencing and holding onto that juicy loving intimate connection we all crave.

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