Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Sallie Werst. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Hi Sallie , thank you for being such a positive, uplifting person. We’ve noticed that so many of the successful folks we’ve had the good fortune of connecting with have high levels of optimism and so we’d love to hear about your optimism and where you think it comes from.
I’ve always been a sort of inherently joyful person and I think a lot of that comes from not stopping to question why too often. Haha! This is particularly challenging I suppose as I am also a person who loves information. I think there are many different chapters that have added to this throughout my life as I’ve needed them but let’s start at the beginning
I was adopted from South Korea and came to the United States at 3 1/2 month into a loving family in New Hampshire who was always honest and open with me about my background. I trusted from a young age that through adoption, I was granted the opportunity to live a better life that I otherwise would have and spent little time fighting this notion. I think knowing that I was born on the other side of the world and could have just as easily grown to understand life through a different language, culture, religion, and overall experience gave me a sense of openness that I could not truly appreciate as a child. Like most important things, my awareness and understanding has grown and evolved over time… perhaps the seed of optimism planted within me was nurtured from the start by a vague but powerful sense of gratitude. I am lucky to have found something I loved in myself at a young age that helped guide me into a way of being that is led more by hope than despair.
At the age of 2, I was put into ballet classes. I had a little brother who was born with a bilateral cleft lip and palette and dance started a place I could go while my family made many journeys to and from the Boston Children’s Hospital for numerous surgeries. Someone asked me in more recent years “why do you dance?” and all I could think of was that it had never really occurred to me to stop. I latched onto ballet right from the get go… the following of directions, the replication of movement, and the validation of being able to do more and more each week. As I grew older it became something I felt in control of during unsure times, a way to feel present, and an environment where some of my dearest friendships grew. There was something special about being with others who cared about the same thing I did. We all faced disappointments as we moved through adolescence together- being cast in parts we didn’t love, receiving nos from a program we really wanted to attend, having to choose between fun social activities and our commitment to dance, managing injuries. There were times this was hard but it was also unavoidable and so we learned from a young age to accept and keep moving. We also learned to celebrate in each others’ triumphs and joy. We trained very seriously as teens and know that getting what we wanted sometimes meant sacrifice and always meant hard work. Dance exposed us to diverse people from all walks of life bonded by a devotion to the daily practice of ballet class. As we bacme more and more fluent in the language of dance together, our relationships were strengthened in a way that is beyond words- with each other, with teachers and mentors, and with ourselves. I think there is strength and optimism that forms naturally is this sort of environment… we had a sense of community woven through the way our minds worked and the way we put our bodies into action. This opened doors for all of us as we went our separate ways. As a teacher now I can reflect on how many transferrable life skills dance offers…. maybe it’s not dance for everyone. But to me, dance is special because your instrument travels with you wherever you go. Our bodies became our homes to build and live in as we chose. How empowering!
Outside of dance, I think there still was a part of me looking to belong. As much as I wanted to dance, I was also confronted with the reality that it was not the more financially secure road to take. Relying on external validation from people’s visions who are not your own proved to be challenging and I was reminded often that dance was not a language understood by the average bear. I always felt like I was straddling two very separate worlds. I moved to NYC to pursue a college degree in business and pursue dance simultaneously. This was a LOT to balance and put me into a place of constant questioning. But in the face of doubt, I had no choice but to enjoy the little things along the way. Dancers are great at detail. We just can’t help but notice- a blessing and a curse. I would also look around and realize that many people did not have something all their own to turn to in times of distress or the ability to be physically active. I felt grateful to have both and happily warred with the challenges of juggling school and dance over the next 4 years. I still felt like I was living a life that many could not understand and so I managed it myself until I graduated from college and realized I was no closer to knowing what I was going to do with my life. Unable to devote myself in full to one path or the other, I had no job and returned home hoping the answer would fall in my lap. I refused to apply to any jobs in my field of marketing… too fearful that I would know exactly how to get myself trapped in a world that I didn’t really want to be in in exchange for a great salary and benefits. I taught dance, worked in restaurants, and entertained a great myriad of odd jobs to avoid being a cube dweller. I found a boy who I loved whose family I adored and decided that I could be grateful for all of this as well. I worked like a dog but I have always taken my play as seriously as my work. I traveled and ate delicious food and drank beers and spent time with friends. I danced when I could, enjoyed the company of all sorts of people, and laughed a lot along the way. I made the Patriots Cheerleader squad which was wildly fun and recognized by dancer and civilian alike- Yay! I thought: the dance bug may be finally out of my system and I can finally move on into doing what all the normal people! This which brought me great relief at the time – and now brings me great humor! I continued to enjoy taking dance classes and felt deeply inspired by one teacher in particular who helped me connect the dots between my artistic growth and my understanding of life in a bigger way. I got married. I felt confident and excited to move into a new chapter.
By the time the pandemic hit, life felt calm. Quarantine and domestic life seemed like a great opportunity to rest and plan my future with my husband. Then suddenly, amidst the stagnancy of the world, I felt out of place. My visions for the future weren’t aligning with those around me and my understanding of what was true and important to me continued to grow stronger as I sat in the quiet with myself for the first time maybe ever. I had checked all the boxes… how come this didn’t feel like “it”?? I was back at a crossroads, questioning. Luckily for me, I’ve always enjoyed my own curiosity. In my experience, questions lead to answers and so I was eager to explore what it was I stood for and what I desired next while the world stood still.
In the stillness, things began to emerge in more obvious ways to me than ever before. My understanding of myself continued to grow through my engagement with the dance world. I met new friends who had been living similar lives to me and was excited to feel camaraderie during a period of so much isolation and fear. With these new found alignments came the realization that I was growing away from others who I did not expect to. Change was happening. And as it often happens with change, much drama occurred (but alas, that is a different story that is entirely its own.) A year into the pandemic I was on my way to being divorced. Leaving a life I had been committed to for nearly my entire adult life was the hardest choice I’ve ever had to make. It was also the most sure of myself I had ever felt. My spirituality began to sprout as I moved through these shadows and I started to realize that throughout my life, my happiness had always grown through the process of discovering, rather than the point of outcome. I started to let go of all that was outside of my control and turn my focus inward. This journey between head and heart has been one of the longest and wildest adventures of all. There have been dark days but they have been real and honest and so I am happy to have had them. It truly felt like everything I lived was preparing me for what was coming next and so, with my roots of knowledge more firmly planted, a greater sense of trust blossomed.
Now, at the age of 40 I can look back and see that I’ve always carried happiness within me. Maybe optimism was something I felt I had no choice but to let in. It was essential. A fully embodied practice, just as dance was. I’ve come full circle with my own practice of joy as a habit. I believe that having the tools to create myself over and over again as the choreographer of my own life have played a major role in my ability to build and maintain an optimistic outlook on life. Life is a dance- a tricky balance of the reality of now and the possibility of what can be, of acceptance and courage, of technical execution and expression. Being able to express the ineffable through dance has kept me from storing too much negativity in my body and made it possible for me to feel authentic in my own skin. I am now the vehicle for my own creative change and I could not be more excited about not knowing where I will take me next!
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
Currently I am focused a lot on teaching. I think passing on the power of using the arts to communicate is more essential than ever. I teach dance in many forms… ballet, jazz, contemporary, hip hop and use my knowledge of each to inform the other. I am a freelance performer and take opportunities to connect with audiences as they come. I am also part of a non profit called New Hampshire Dance Collaborative whose mission is to make dance am ore well understood, accessible, and utilized art form. NHDC creates immersive multi-disciplinary dance opportunities with organizations to provoke discussion, understanding, actions, and problem solving. I feel excited to use my life experiences and love for dance to build bridges in the community I grew up in. We are currently bringing focus to the fact that we have evolved into a grant making organization and our using our Dance Accelerator Program to help foster growth in the small towns of New Hampshire who do not have the kind of access that organizations in larger more metropolitan cities do. Working with founder and director, Joan Brodsky, we have taken on 3 fellows thus far: Nsquared Dance, Theatre Kapok, and Lila Productions and are working with them continuously to help them through financial support, mentorship, and opportunities to connect, create, and collaborate within our community. We know the power of dance and want to encourage those who might not see the importance of arts education to expand their worldviews and experience that power!
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
Tenacity, truth, and. creativity.
Avoiding discomfort is impossible in this life. Having the desire and determination to continue to persist despite difficult times arising has been absolutely imperative in my journey. To me, having tenacity means insisting on your own existence under all circumstances and knowing that this will always be what leads to the next level of what is possible.
Knowing relies on knowledge… and here enters the importance of truth. Having the critical thinking skills the help discern the difference between things that are true and things that are not is critical in developing one’s own sense of authenticity. How can we begin to know ourselves if we have no trust in the world around us? But if we can share stories of what we do know and communicate what we don’t, we can build that trust and foster relationships that guide us to live more meaningful lives. By being informed, we give power back to ourselves. In my own journey, looking further into any given situations to seek the truth has always proven to be worthy, Acting on hearsay, rumor, charisma, enthusiasm, and emotion alone can be tempting but separating fact from fiction has helped me move through challenges with less fear and regret and led me to have a firmer grasp of what I stand for. Asking questions along the way and continuing to learn from different perspectives keeps us widening our views and making decisions with the greater good in mind.
Everyone has their own technique when it comes to getting things done. But are we able to adapt when the unforeseen comes along? I think that as much as we know things that have happened, we must also maintain the ability to think of new ways to do things! As we recognize patterns we get to decide which ones we want to repeat and which ones we do not. Being flexible about outcomes is not something that necessarily comes easily to me as there is a certain amount of control we need to relinquish to break free from the hamster wheel! Shifting into this way of thinking is not for the weak -especially in a world where we celebrate outcomes and milestones, graduations and weddings, job titles and and resumes. But just as dance steps are supported by transitions between them, our steps in life would be nothing if not for what happens between them. I think honoring the subtleties, missteps, and spontaneous moments is how we embrace living a creative life. We are all creative beings and when we can find our own ways to hold ourselves in that notion, we can move forward bravely. Own it all.
Is there a particular challenge you are currently facing?
The number one challenge I am currently facing is the notion that the arts are not essential. There is a giant disconnect between arts organizations and money making organizations. Funding for arts programs is constantly being cut, This is not a new problem but it deserves to be brought up again and again as the arts & sciences were meant to walk hand in hand and that relationship is highly endangered. It is extremely difficult for people to entertain the idea of living creative lives because when it comes to money, everyone wants a sure bet. And yet, how is anyone to learn through trial and error if not given the space to have any errors? Clearly, this is not something I can overcome on my own, but I can be a part of the building. I hope to continue to build community with like minded people, connect New Hampshire Dance Collaborative with other similar non profits, and build alongside each other to give people access and exposure to the arts, particularly dance. I hope that by helping just a few determined artists along, we can be a part of growing the value of humanity as a whole. Perhaps care and dignity and empathy and truth can be seen as a form of currency that is worth more than the $. By providing NHDC Dance Accelerator Fellows with financial aid and access to strategic business planning mentorship, we hope to open doors of opportunity for creative minds who have so much to offer but are in need of this kind of support.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://nhdancecollaborative.org
- Instagram: @nhdancecollab
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nhdancecollab
Image Credits
Tim Avery, Matthew Lamanno, Devyn Sky, Emma Cahoon (courtesy of Squared Dance, Theatre Kapow, Lila Productions)
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