We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Sarah Saturday. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Sarah below.
Sarah, thank you so much for making time for us. We’ve always admired your ability to take risks and so maybe we can kick things off with a discussion around how you developed your ability to take and bear risk?
My short answer to this is “aging.” In my late teens and early 20s, I wanted so badly to get validation from the outside world and to get noticed for what I was doing. I was very driven by my ego, which is to some degree natural at that stage of life, but I was looking outside myself most of the time, trying try to find myself reflected in the people around me. I did risky things, but that is very different from taking risks. After trying very hard for nearly a decade to “make it” in the music business as a musician, I realized that this was only making me miserable. I left the band I was in, moved to LA, and started working on the business side of the industry. This taught me a lot about how it all really worked, what was really going on, and what it really took to become a famous musician. I wasn’t sure that’s what I wanted for my life, so I went back to the drawing board and started making music again just for fun and for myself, sharing it with friends. The difference between making music in this relaxed, low-pressure way versus this hyper, panicky way I had done it before was such a welcome relief, and brought me back to why I started writing songs in the first place. I decided then that I would never make art for the sake of getting validation ever again, and by my early 30s I was making the weirdest stuff I’d ever made, and it was taking on a life of its own. I still had a lot of work to do around that ego of mine, and the underlying trauma and dysfunction that had morphed it into a hungry monster that desperately needed validation, but luckily I hit my breaking point before it got the best of me. My 30s were all about therapy and recovery, and through that inner work I was able to heal my broken self-esteem and discover my true self, which helped me develop even more confidence to take even more risks. By the time I hit 40, I was starting every new project from the place of risk. The weirder, grander, or more complex the idea, the more excited I was about attempting to pull it off. I couldn’t have gotten to this point without the struggle and fumbling and evolution of those early years, and there was no way I was powerful enough to rush that process. I couldn’t even see that I was in it until enough time had gone by to look back! Some of this is unique to my story, but most of it is, I believe, the basic story arc of any person who is seeking greater meaning in this life.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
My goal in life is to be useful to the world through my own healing. I do a lot of things to support this goal. I try to be useful by involving myself in different communities, whether that’s the arts, mindfulness, recovery, volunteering, or just being active in my neighborhood. I enjoy making music and performance art pieces, so I use these as channels to share the things I’m learning about myself and the world. I enjoy bringing people together and facilitating memorable experiences for people, so I host a lot of different kinds of events. I spend many hours every week doing the work of healing — going to therapy, going to recovery meetings, working with mentors, mentoring others, taking care of my physical body with healthy food and exercise, practicing mindfulness and meditation, studying literature, taking in art, and practicing healthy intimacy in my relationships. But all of this takes time, and time is money, and bills need to be paid! So, to support these efforts, I work a full-time day job as a software developer. I recently released a new 40-minute performance piece, “Voyage,” and its accompanying soundtrack album. This is my biggest and most complex artistic release to-date and I’m hoping to get to share it with more people in 2024.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
Organization, communication, collaboration. I wasn’t always great at these, but they were inherent in me and I realized early on that they were major assets when coming from a non-controlling, self-aware place. I’ve worked hard to develop these skills over the years, mostly through trial and error, which is of course the best way to learn! Mentors, therapists, and trusted friends have played a huge role in helping me understand how to use develop skills.
Any advice for folks feeling overwhelmed?
I start to feel overwhelmed when I have let my mind get the best of me. When I am too attached to my thoughts, living in a fantasy world (positive or negative), dissociating from reality or generally just thinking too much, I quickly lose touch with reality and start to spiral. This is when my Inner Critic can get the best of me, and once that thing has taken control of my mind, it’s very difficult to free myself! I have had to learn how to use a lot of mental/emotional tools over the years to help my “stinking thinking.” Therapy is number one — I believe every human being should have a professional they are consulting with regularly about their brains. Mindfulness is a very close second. Or better yet, if you can find a mindfulness-based cognitive behavioral therapist, that’s the real sweet spot! I keep up with these practices by having a daily meditation practice and by practicing mindfulness all day every day, which means noticing when I’ve slipped into thinking and bringing my focus back to the present moment. I’ve needed support from teachers and meditation groups in addition to therapy to develop this practice. I also participate in several recovery support groups every week, which are basically free group therapy. This network of people who themselves are learning how to use new mental/emotional tools is invaluable, and the first thing I do when I’m feeling overwhelmed is call one of them to help me get grounded and remind me to use my tools. Connection is the antidote to that stinking thinking!
Contact Info:
- Website: sarahsaturday.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/gardeningnotarchitecture
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sarahsaturday/
- Youtube: https://youtube.com/gardeningnotarchitecture
Image Credits
Danielle Shields, Tiffany Bessire
