Meet Shalyn Isaacs

We were lucky to catch up with Shalyn Isaacs recently and have shared our conversation below.

Shalyn, looking forward to learning from your journey. You’ve got an amazing story and before we dive into that, let’s start with an important building block. Where do you get your work ethic from?

I have a present and former work ethic. I’ll tell you about both.

Presently, I am reshaping my work ethic to be one that nourishes my mind, body, and spirit rather than drains me. However, for most of my life, my work ethic was rooted in overworking, achieving, striving, and enduring constant stress at the expense of my mental and physical health and relationships. But this has changed over the past 2 years.

My work ethic stems from two places: (1) it is inseparable from my identity as a South Asian woman navigating cultural and gender-based expectations of success, and (2) it originates from a survival-based response to experiences of racism in childhood and professional spaces as an adult. Let me describe both.

I am the first person and woman in my lineage to complete a University education. From the time I was a child, I internalized this narrative: as the daughter of immigrants who fled the war in Sri Lanka, I had to prove to my family that their sacrifices were worth it. I am the eldest daughter and granddaughter on both sides of my family, and when I was born, my grandparents gave me the nickname: “Number One.” I was expected by my family to live up to the title.

Part of my drive to have a strong work ethic was an attempt to show my family that I could be a good role model for my younger sister and cousins and bring “honor” to our lineage. The concept of “honor” varies across South Asian cultures and dialects, but in Sri Lankan-Sinhalese culture, it is deeply tied to academic and professional achievement. It is also deeply gendered. Women, in particular, are often expected to uphold family dignity through modesty, respectability, and fulfilling familial and societal duties. For eldest daughters, there can be additional pressure to be role models, setting a precedent for younger siblings and relatives.

This sense of responsibility felt less like a choice and more like an inherited duty—one that shaped my identity and self-worth from an early age. The pressure to succeed was not just personal; it carried the weight of my family’s resilience, their sacrifices, and the unspoken hope that my achievements could, in some way, validate the struggles they endured and shape possibilities for those who come after me.

Although carrying this responsibility felt heavy at times – I am deeply grateful for it. My family and culture placed seeds in my mind and heart to remember that whatever I create in this life can have positive ripple effects for present and future generations.

Secondly, I believe my former work ethic was rooted as a response to racism and sexism.
I experienced significant racial trauma for ten years throughout childhood as one of the few racialized students in my elementary and high school. After years of race-based bullying and a lack of protection from the academic administration, I came to believe that I had no one to rely on but myself if I wanted to live a fulfilling life. As a trauma response, I sincerely believed that if I could just work hard enough and excel in academics and my career, I could free myself from the shame of racism and inferiority.

Although this pattern of race and gender-based inequity started in childhood and adolescence, it continued to show its head in professional spaces while I was an adult. My former work ethic was based in the belief that I needed to prove myself – whether to my family, culture, or institutions and leaders – that I was good enough.

In high school and university, I excelled in my psychology courses, worked and volunteered in the mental health field, became the President of my university’s first women’s mental health organization, and was the first student to serve on the Board of the largest mental health hospital in Canada. I received the highest awards of recognition for graduating students from York University, earned a Master’s of Education in Counselling Psychology from the University of Toronto, and went on to establish a thriving private practice.

Yet, after winning awards and achieving what I once believed were my academic and career dreams, I realized that no amount of external success or validation can shield us from the pain of racism, trauma, or unmet childhood needs.
My former work ethic was a trauma response—a desperate attempt to gain approval from institutions and people so that I could finally feel safe and “good enough” within myself.

When my grandfather passed away in April 2023 from a sudden and unexpected illness – his death forced me to reexamine my values and relationship with work and life. It was his death that made me finally realize that I was chasing ‘impact’ and career achievements at not only the expense of my health and well-being – but also at the cost of spending time with loved ones. Death makes us realize that we do not have a lot of time on this Earth, and I recognized that I did not want to spend my life and time constantly chasing after ‘more’. There were family gatherings that I often missed. There were phone calls that I did not make because I believed educational and career growth was more important. Some of my grandfather’s last words to me before he passed away were: ‘it is the loneliness, Shalyn.’

I closed my private practice for nearly two years after my grandfather passed away to process my grief, but also to intentionally create space to heal wounds from my past and realign my career and relationships from a place of possibility rather than survival—one that honors my true values and desires rather than denying them for the sake of conforming to social norms of success.

That summer of 2023 I learned how to cook recipes from my cultural heritage. I layed down under the sun and noticed the blue skies above me. I spent time by the forests and lakes nearby, and wrote in countless journals. I was healing. I was coming home to myself. For the first time – I was prioritizing my health and relationships ahead of work and chasing success.

In January 2024 – I reopened my private practice to specialize in offering career counselling to women of color, along with offering yoga and trauma-informed creative writing workshops. Rather than repeating cycles of exhaustion and striving, my work ethic is now built on a foundation that supports women of color with reclaiming their time and energy from racism and capitalism and with aligning their career visions with their true values and desires, rather than with inequitable expectations. I do this work from a place of rest and joy, rather than from a place of over-working my mind and body (on most days, anyways).
I have come to see that our careers are cyclical – and can be doorways where we discover more about who we truly are at the core through every obstacle and opportunity.

I have learned that the more we heal our wounds, the more it changes the way we engage with work and life from a different state of being that can nourish our mind-body-spirit.

My current work ethic is about shattering every expectation I was conditioned to believe I had to meet in order to experience joy and to feel good enough within myself. It is about sharing knowledge and resources with communities, not for validation, but from a deep desire for all of us to be free.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

I own a private practice (www.sisaacswellness.com). I am a Career Counsellor, yoga teacher and workshop facilitator based out of Ottawa, Canada.

I specialize in offering career counselling to women of color from a trauma-informed and culturally affirming framework.

My counselling, yoga classes, and creative writing workshops support communities of women with diverse racial and cultural identities with prioritizing mental health in the workplace, and with making choices with their career and finances from a place of alignment with their core values and holistic well-being.​

For Career Counselling, people can contact me through my website: www.sisaacswellness.com

UPCOMING EVENTS:

Ottawa In-Person Day Retreat: A Career and Financial Wellness Retreat for Women of Color, April 5th, 2025 from 12pm-5pm EST located in the Ottawa Arts Court. More information and tickets can be found at: https://www.eventbrite.com/o/shalyn-isaacs-89265121263

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Practicing Interconnectedness: I know that the healing and change I create within myself will ripple out to have a positive effect on others and communities. We are interconnected with the Earth, animals, and all beings near and far – and so I practice regular yoga, meditation, writing, and other practices to ensure my actions align with my values for creating healthier futures for myself, the earth and future generations. Whenever I feel hopeless, I practice acknowledging what is within my control and focus on that.

Discernment: I believe discernment is the most underrated skill when it comes to career development among marginalized communities. It’s important to practice evaluating what beliefs we hold about ourselves that are based in our own beliefs, and which are based in other people’s limited perceptions of us that are influenced by racial and gendered stereotypes. What other people believe is possible for us to achieve is often limited by their experiences and belief systems. It’s important to cultivate the skill of discernment and self-compassion so that we make choices in our lives and careers from a place of knowing who we truly are and what we are capable of creating.

Learning About The Effects of Trauma on the Mind-Body System: I sincerely believe that knowledge is power. Through understanding the effects of trauma (including racial, systemic and intergenerational trauma) on communities, we can engage with ourselves and others from a place of greater compassion. This knowledge has the capacity to change how we see ourselves, other people, and all beings we share this earth with. Trauma-informed practices allow us create new possibilities for ourselves and future generations that we may not have known were possible otherwise.

My advice for people starting out in their healing or career wellness journeys is to seek out mentors or community that can support and empower your vision. Don’t be afraid to admit your limitations and ask for help – humility goes a long, long way. Remember to go slowly and patiently with yourself – there is no destination in this life to arrive at and so enjoy this present moment, even with its challenges, because life does not need to feel perfect in order to be enjoyed.

Tell us what your ideal client would be like?

I specialize in offering career counselling with women of color from a trauma-informed, culturally affirming framework. Those who are struggling with self-confidence, ”imposter syndrome”, career changes, workplace inequities or are desiring to navigate their career and financial decisions from a place of connection to their values and holistic wellness could benefit from career counselling with my approach.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.sisaacswellness.com
• Instagram: @s.isaacs.wellness
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/shalynisaacs/