Meet Shyloh Hadley

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Shyloh Hadley a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Shyloh, so excited to talk about all sorts of important topics with you today. The first one we want to jump into is about being the only one in the room – for some that’s being the only person of color or the only non-native English speaker or the only non-MBA, etc Can you talk to us about how you have managed to be successful even when you were the only one in the room that looked like you?

My first day at Ulta Beauty in 2020, someone asked me if I would prefer they/them pronouns. Saying “yes”to this question took a leap of faith, but every “yes” since then has mounted into a chorus of “Yes! Here I am!” That I’ve been proudly shouting since.

My hesitation came from a lack of representation. I had trouble seeing a future for myself where I could be both non-binary and professionally successful because I didn’t have any role models of that success. Being welcomed on that first day as not only my full self, but this secret self I’d been hiding allowed me the courage to come out. The best and most successful versions of everyone I knew were their most authentic selves, so why not allow myself a chance to try.

I’ve entered some pretty big rooms as the only transgender voice- from auditioning to be on Ulta Beauty’s prestigious Design Team to going on stage at Premiere Orlando. I remind myself that sometimes you’re the only person like you in a room because that room was waiting for you to enter it. I’m bringing a unique perspective that is missing, but is needed and deserves to be heard. And when I’m the first? Well, someone has to go first! By being the first I know I’m opening up that possibility to a generation of other transgender people who didn’t realize their presence was an option, and I know I won’t be the last.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

As a hairstylist I’m passionate about compassionate mentorship. How do we succeed in a service career while maintaining our energy, empathy and making time for ourselves? I’ve found that with the growth of social media there is an abundance of technical knowledge available to new stylists- they can easily find six different ways to create any technique they can imagine, and there’s plenty of business building advice out there, too. What’s missing is so often the soft skills. I’m passionate about empowering stylist to create a warm and welcoming environment for all guests that embraces them for who they are and what makes them uniquely beautiful. When we find things to celebrate and love about each other we can’t help but love ourselves a little more, too.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?

Setting boundaries- I call this “protecting my yes”. Saying “Yes!” To something I’m excited about doing is an amazing feeling. In order to get to say yes to all the things that light me up and make me excited, personally and professionally, I have to protect my ability to say “yes” by saying “no” to the things that drain me and are not meant for me. This might look like sticking to a set schedule so that we aren’t burnt out. Then, when an opportunity arises outside of my normal work, I can happily say “yes” because I’m not burnt out.

Asking the right questions- If we only ask guests what they want we might miss the opportunity to give them what they need. I start every service with a consultation, even if I’ve been seeing a guest for ten years. Our styles and our bodies are always changing- by asking how they’re doing and how their hair is working for them I allow them the chance to change their mind or identify a need I can help them meet with their hair.

Fearlessly trying- When I think about all the things in my life I wouldn’t have done if I was afraid to try, afraid to be the first, or afraid to do something without being given an invitation, that is not the life I want to live! So often we fall back on what we’ve always done. In professional settings, saying “I’d like to give that a try!” Has led to some of the best moments of my career, There is power in the word “try”. It’s optimistic, and it’s not a promise of any particular outcome. Sometimes when we try things they don’t lead to success or we might not enjoy them, and that is okay!

Okay, so before we go, is there anyone you’d like to shoutout for the role they’ve played in helping you develop the essential skills or overcome challenges along the way?

Something that has helped me stay focused and remain balanced is having a challenging hobby outside of my professional life that gives me space to challenge myself and practice failing in a low stakes environment. I’ve played in a band, joined an ice hockey league, and trained for marathons. Failure is hard! It doesn’t feel good to want something and not be successful, but it’s something we can practice just like any other skill. By practicing failing I’ve learned that I can hit a wrong note and the performance will continue. If my shot doesn’t go in the net, a teammate might get the rebound, but either way the game will go on. Our failures, while they sting for us, don’t bring the larger project to a halt. Picking yourself up after a failure and learning how to smile and move on takes practice, and the better at it we can get the more successful we’ll be personally and professionally.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: https://Instagram.com/hairbyshyloh

Image Credits

ISP Creative