We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Sumbul Ali-Karamali a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Sumbul, so excited to talk about all sorts of important topics with you today. The first one we want to jump into is about being the only one in the room – for some that’s being the only person of color or the only non-native English speaker or the only non-MBA, etc Can you talk to us about how you have managed to be successful even when you were the only one in the room that looked like you?
My entire life and career have been shaped by this very issue — being the only one like me in the room! I grew up in a white, middle-class suburb of Los Angeles, and I was usually the only Muslim and the only Indian-Pakistani person those around me had ever met. This situation forced me to, from quite a young age, be patient with questions which were uninformed (“Do you paint your face and believe in lots of gods?”), often premised on misconceptions (“Ask for help. If you cannot. Understand. Our English,” slowly and clearly said my high school history teacher), and increasingly over the years based on hostile presumptions (“Why are Muslims more violent than other kinds of people?” asked one of the partners in my law firm when I first started my job as a newbie lawyer). I always answered all the questions, trying my best to explain to impatient and skeptical and sometimes contemptuous listeners what it meant to be Muslim. And I always appreciated all the (sincere) questions I was asked, because they represented opportunities to build cultural bridges between multiple American cultures, mine and theirs.
Writing a book to answer all those questions seemed like a natural next step. But I immediately bumped into the problem that all minority groups face: how could I correct the misconceptions without sounding defensive? Because if I try to swim against the tide of media and public discourse and normalized stereotypes, ANY kind of correction I make will automatically sound defensive, whether I feel defensive or not. That is what happens when a minority opinion or fact challenges a majority worldview: the majority worldview feels normal, and anything that challenges it sounds bitter or defensive or uncomfortable.
My answer was to write a book that was really the first of its kind with respect to religion — an academically reliable book, like a textbook, that read like a memoir. In other words, I wrote a textbook in the first person, with my explanations illustrated with personal anecdotes and stories. I channeled all those years of being the only one in the room, and I wrote my book as if I were answering those questions across a kitchen table or in a dorm room or at lunch. I’ve written three books in this style, now, and the most wonderful aspect of writing them is that I’ve been able to reach so many more people than I ever could in person, which means my books have made a contribution to fostering cultural understanding in our frequently divided world.
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
As I get older, it feels as though the world is dealing with the same issues of prejudice, ignorance, tribalism, and xenophobia as it always has, despite all our efforts. As a Muslim woman with a degree in Islamic law, my focus is address anti-Muslim prejudice, most frequently called Islamophobia.
I write books that are written for non-specialist general readers, easy and engaging to read, and written in the first person with stories and anecdotes about growing up Muslim in California. (Star Trek and how it related to being Muslim! Appreciating the kosher hot dogs at Dodger Stadium! Having to run the mile for the Presidential Physical Fitness test while fasting!) But my books are also academically reliable and trustworthy, because I’m an academic and I’m meticulously careful with my sources and citations.
My books have been read by students (as young as middle school) and general readers, and they’ve been used in classrooms, as well. There’s a plethora of false information about Islam in our public discourse, so my books aim to provide trustworthy explanations of what Muslims believe and live their lives and how that relates to the news reports that inundate us. And most of all, I endeavor to write books that are relatable and fun to read (because, honestly, who wants to read a boring book on religion?).
I also give talks and interviews and lectures. I’ve spoken to audiences of enormously varied ages and backgrounds. I have an informal style that’s unusual for a speaker on my topic, and I feel my talk is a success if I can make my audience laugh!
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
First, I always loved to write, and even as a child I self-edited without any prompting. Although my books took time and enormous amounts of research to write, I loved writing them.
In addition, it was earning an LLM in Islamic Law after I earned my JD that started me on the journey of writing books. In fact, I earned my degree in Islamic for the very purpose of writing the books I’d always wanted to write!
The third skill I have now is an engaging public speaking style. But I have to say that, for most of my life, my fear of public speaking was greater than my fear of death! Yup, death. I was the child who hid at the back of the classroom. I never raised my hand in college. I dreaded being called on in law school. It’s why I became a corporate lawyer rather than a litigator.
And yet, when my first book was released, I had hundreds of public speaking events the first year, including interviews on television and radio, including on radio shows on which I was harangued and heckled. How did I do this without dying of terror?
Sometimes I felt like an interview (specifically one I had on CNN) had taken years off my life! But I had to do it. Reaching people to build those intercultural bridges I so wanted to build necessitated I had to get up in front of audiences, give talks, and answer questions. The night before my first radio interview, I prepared obsessively and then couldn’t sleep all night. But I got through it, and every interview became easier after that.
So my advice is never to let your deep fears interfere with your goals. I never thought I would be speaking to audiences who are sometimes much more personally antagonistic than a courtroom would ever have been! And, to my astonishment, I’ve come to enjoy public speaking. I love connecting with people, and I have met wonderful people at my talks and have made friends all over the world. Keep your goals in sight, don’t let your fears interfere, and remember that you might just enter a whole new world as a result.
Okay, so before we go we always love to ask if you are looking for folks to partner or collaborate with?
My public speaking events focus on answering the questions that are never covered in media. In the news, we hear about Muslims in violent contexts; in fact, one study found that 90% of stories in media studied featured Muslims in the context of violence. It’s difficult, with this kind of conditioning, to NOT think of Muslims without thinking of violence! My talks, in contrast, are about what Muslims believe, what do we in our daily lives, how we feel as a community about diversity and inclusion and LGBTQIA+ rights, are Muslim women really oppressed (hint: at least 13 Muslim women have been heads of state in recent decades — presidents or prime ministers), and so on. But I also explain all the stuff we hear in the media that touches on Muslims and I address why we have the stereotypes in the first place.
Therefore, I partner with individuals and organizations who endeavor to increase awareness, knowledge, and connections between their communities and Muslims. Islam is an American religion, too, and including Muslims in diversity efforts is important for all of us, Muslim or not. I have given talks at universities, high schools, middle schools, churches, synagogues, mosques, book clubs, alumni organizations, Rotary Clubs, and other venues. I have a unique approach –synthesizing academic material for general audiences in an everyday, relatable context. I can be contacted through my website for speaking requests.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.muslimnextdoor.com
Image Credits
Evan Winslow Smith
