We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Tara Accardo. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Tara below.
Hi Tara, so excited to have you with us today and we are really interested in hearing your thoughts about how folks can develop their empathy? In our experience, most folks want to be empathic towards others, but in a world where we are often only surrounded by people who are very similar to us, it can sometimes be a challenge to develop empathy for others who might not be as similar to us. Any thoughts or advice?
This really started from an early age for me. My parents were incredible examples of this growing up, and instilled this in me in as many situations as they could. But ultimately, while that was profoundly impactful, my deepest journey with empathy came after losing them.
Both of my parents died from cancer within six months of each other. My mom in December 2019, and my dad in July 2020. Needless to say, their deaths upended my entire world. As an only child, especially, it was a loneliness, isolation and anguish I could never have imagined. That already taught me so much about empathy, because I could put myself in the shoes of others in a way I never had before.
From there, I started Losses Become Gains which is a platform and community that offers Grief and Life Coaching, the Life With Grief Podcast, and other modalities of support. Once I began 1:1 coaching, holding space for conversations with fellow grievers on the podcast, and diving deeper into this cathartic and healing work, that “empathy muscle”, as I like to call it, truly began flexing in new and powerful ways.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
My name is Tara Accardo, I’m a Grief and Soul Purpose Coach and host of the Life With Grief Podcast. After losing my parents to cancer within six months of each other and navigating a traumatic birth experience, my journey of grieving led me to create Losses Become Gains, a platform and community I’m deeply proud of that’s incredibly close to my heart.
I offer Grief and Life Coaching, the Life With Grief Podcast, and other modalities of support. Once I began 1:1 coaching, holding space for conversations with fellow grievers on the podcast, and diving deeper into this cathartic and healing work, it became more and more clear that my passion, calling, and commitment to uplifting and empowering fellow grievers runs so much deeper than I could have ever thought possible.
It truly is one of those gifts that comes along with grief that, when we’re not looking for it but we lean into it, can create such magic in our lives. It has connected me with new people and friends I never would have met otherwise, empowered me to build a support system that is one of the most valued parts of my life, and gain a deeper understanding for the human experience. There are so many reasons that my work is so exciting and special, but these are definitely top of that list! My “why” is empowering other grievers to know that this post-loss transformation is well within their hands, too.
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
Understanding the true meaning of holding space, deep empathy, and witnessing others in their grief are by far the most impactful aspects of the work I do now, and what I’ve learned in my own journey personally and professionally. Even thought this has certainly made an impact in my work as a Grief & Soul Purpose Coach and welcoming guests onto my podcast, this has truly bled into so many aspects of my life in ways I couldn’t have imagined. I’m more patient with others in general, I understand there is SO much more going on beyond the surface that we often don’t realize, and everyone has a story we don’t know the depths of. This has really broadened my horizons and perspectives, and I’m profoundly grateful for this work as that is genuinely such a gift.
The advice I would have for others is to challenge yourself to get yourself out of your own shoes and put yourself in another’s. Holding space requires getting a little uncomfortable at times. It’s putting ourselves in unfamiliar territory, but that’s where SO much growth can happen and it’s beautiful to witness. Not being fearful to do that and being willing to sit in those tough conversations is a skill and quality I think we all need to work on on a societal level. Ultimately, it’s being able to put our own ego and beliefs aside and approach others with an open heart and mind.
What was the most impactful thing your parents did for you?
I love this question, and will use any excuse to talk about my parents that I can! And, ultimately, they inspired every single aspect of the work I do. My parents did countless things to impact my life, but overall, they inspired me to get curious, never stop learning, and explore, explore, explore.
They inspired me to curious about life and all it has to offer. Trying new foods, going to new places, absorbing new and different perspectives.
Never stop learning about myself, others, and even academically and spiritually (they both continued to do this until the day they died). And, they always encouraged me to lean into my passions and discover what truly lights me up.
When I wanted to study abroad in Florence, Italy when I was 19 having never left the country, they (cautiously) encouraged me to go and knew what value it would bring to my life. They never discouraged my natural gifts, and frankly, I think–I know, actually–they would be thrilled with what I do now. Especially my podcast, because my mom always thought I would end up on TV somehow. She probably didn’t think that’d be YouTube, but it’s the thought that counts, right? But, I will also be in a documentary coming out in 2026, and I just know they’re beaming on the “other side”. The opportunities that have come my way since leaning into my purpose have been truly incredible.
They also sparked a pretty serious travel bug within me, as they really loved to travel, too. This has rubbed off on me in such a way that I actually now have a second podcast called Taste Toast Travel that I host with my husband, John. This community and podcast is all about the joys of food, drink, and travel and how that impacts our life. It’s really another extension of what my parents brought to my life.
They never would have wanted me to stop living after they died, and it’s because of their parenting and teachings that I, eventually, felt comfortable enough not just existing, but truly thriving. I hate that I can’t share this with them in person, but their impact on my life truly knows no bounds.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.lossesbecomegains.com
- Instagram: @lossesbecomegains, @lifewithgriefpodcast
- Facebook: https://facebook.com/lossesbecomegains
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@lifewithgriefpodcast
Image Credits
Becca Skidgel Photography
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