Meet Tasha Seiter

We were lucky to catch up with Tasha Seiter recently and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Tasha, really happy you were able to join us today and we’re looking forward to sharing your story and insights with our readers. Let’s start with the heart of it all – purpose. How did you find your purpose?

I’ve been curious about psychology and relationships since I was a child, and knew I wanted to be a therapist from the age of 15. I’m an identical twin, and at that age, my grandfather gave me a book about twins who were separated at birth. The twins had all sorts of similarities even having grown up in vastly different homes. I became hungry to learn as much as I could about psychology: who we are, how we develop, what helps us thrive. This curiosity combined with growing up in a family of helpers (my dad a nurse practitioner and my mom a social worker) led me to becoming a therapist.
On a camping trip at the age of 19, I read John Gottman’s research by the light of a headlamp. He studied newlywed couples- videotaping their interactions. And he could predict with 90% accuracy who would divorce by looking at those tapes! I wanted to know how I could help others have better relationships. From my readings and my own life experiences, as well as watching the lives of those around me, it became clear to me that good relationships meant a good life.
I became a little obsessed with learning everything I could about people and relationships. In college, I majored in human biology and psychology. I wanted to understand everything I could about how people work. After college, I worked in a psychology lab videotaping young couples and studying their communication behaviors. As I watched the videos, I longed to learn more about how I could directly help them find safety, comfort, and joy in their relationships.
I went to graduate school here at CSU, getting my MS in Marriage and Family Therapy and my PhD in Applied Developmental Science, in the department of Human Development and Family Studies. It was there that I started to work with couples and found out just how much I loved it. My research focused on how couple communication affects stress physiology, with my dissertation work surrounding interpersonal mindfulness in couples and its relationship with physiological reactivity to marital conflict, physical health, and cellular aging.
Although I loved the graduate program I attended, including the faculty I worked with, the students, and the freedom to pursue my intellectual interests, I couldn’t wait to get out of school to start my own business and work for myself. While finishing my PhD, I started my private practice as a couples therapist. On a mission to be as helpful as I could to my clients, I threw myself into learning everything I could about the most effective and evidence-based couples therapy methods, including Gottman Method Couples Therapy and Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT).
This hard work has started to pay off in unexpected, and beautiful, ways. Last spring, a couple of years into private practice, I had a waitlist of 50 people. This showed me just how much our community needs highly trained and specialized relationship specialists, so I decided to start a group practice. First I hired Ann, another highly trained EFT therapist and wonderful person. After her caseload filled up, I found another amazing therapist to add to the team. And then another, and then another. Now, I have five other couple’s therapists on my team. Our practice, Heart of the Matter Therapy, specializes in science-backed and compassionate therapy methods for couples. My mission as a business owner is to keep building a practice of highly skilled and trained relationship therapy specialists and to provide healthy, rewarding careers for my team. I want to give back to our therapists who work hard every day for their clients.

Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?

At Heart of the Matter Therapy and Coaching, we are a team of highly-trained relationship therapy specialists who practice science-backed and compassionate methods of couples therapy. With advanced training in the most evidence-based methods, including Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) and Gottman Method Couples Therapy, we use the most effective methods in our practice to move couples toward secure, joyful relationships. We help couples find a way out of the patterns that they’re stuck in by learning how to communicate in more authentic and vulnerable ways. New ways of communicating restructure the very foundation of relationships and change our clients lives! We offer couples, individual, and family therapy in Fort Collins and online throughout the state.

There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?

Somebody could have all of the couples therapy training and knowledge in the world, but if they don’t have a genuine care for their clients, they won’t last long in this field. We do this work because we are devoted to our purpose of helping others have better relationships. The feelings of compassion that we feel for our clients every day are very real, and help us connect with our clients as fellow humans. I think the qualities of compassion, empathy, and loving the process of helping others grow are essential for couples counselors, because when we have these traits we enjoy using them and love the work!

Tell us what your ideal client would be like?

Myself and my team specialize in couples therapy in-person in Fort Collins, Colorado and online throughout Colorado. It might be frequent fights, or conflict that escalates, or a desire for a deeper connection. I help couples with presentations ranging from moving past affairs and high conflict to premarital checkups. Together we can get to a clearer level of understanding and break out of your pattern. In nourishing a relationship, we build a safe haven of comfort and joy which gives the strength to face life challenges. This powerful force, called love, is the most important thing in this life.

Contact Info:

Image Credits

Headshots taken by Janel at Soulful Images

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