We were lucky to catch up with Theresa Gomes recently and have shared our conversation below.
Theresa, so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.
The quote, ‘Insecurity is loud while true confidence is quiet’ put into words what I couldn’t when thinking about what confidence and self-esteem means to me. I had started my inner work journey during the summer of 2022 and during that time, I went through all of the highs and lows, from facing my shadow (the parts of me that I used to deem as shameful and unloveable), establishing healthy boundaries, saying no, and so much more. I think confidence is multi-faceted and there are so many particles that make up the whole. With my current state of mind, I believe true, sustainable confidence starts from within and how you show up for yourself. Are you staying true to your own promises? Are you honoring your needs? What is your level of discipline towards your goals? And most importantly do you have an inner dialogue that is rooted in unconditional love, compassion and grace? I also look at confidence as always being a work in progress. There’s no set destination, just a deeper understanding of yourself and unveiling this deeper inner knowing of who you are and an unwavering sense of deservingness that you are important no more or no less than anyone else. You have a lot to offer just by being YOU. We all emit energy down to a subconscious level. Insecure energy comes off as desperate, irrational, reactive, and impulsive while confidence flows and weaves itself into any situation good or bad without the unhealthy need for recognition. I don’t blame myself for doing the best with what I had when I was younger and had no self-esteem or real confidence because regardless of how I look at it, what’s the past is the past. I cannot control what has already happened, but I can learn from it and grow so when I face any challenges, I have more tools and resources to help me navigate it without derailing or resorting to low-self worth behavior. Lastly, how you take care of yourself has a resounding effect on confidence and self-esteem in my opinion. It communicates to the universe that you care about the body you’ve been given and with that I believe it creates an energy of high self worth without having to say anything at all.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
My name is Theresa Gomes, but call me Ressa (rhymes with pizza hehe) 🙂
I’m a Long Island native living just outside of DC as a UGC content creator and certified private Pilates Instructor. I was born in 1995 and grew up on Long Island until the end of my junior year of college at Johnson & Wales University where I graduated with a Bachelor’s degree in Culinary Arts and Food Service Management. I know, how did I go from being a chef to working in the social media and fitness industry? Well one thing you need to know about me is that I relentlessly follow my passions, and since I was about 10 years old, I thought I wanted to be a chef since I naturally took to the kitchen. It was really a coping mechanism while my dad was serving in Iraq for about 6 months and I wanted to pull my weight around the house by making new meals for my family. But as I entered into the real world of the food industry and discovered how the work/life balance was non-existent and how the people I worked for were not aspirational at best, and at it’s worst, the most emotionally and mentally abusive – I knew I had to get out immediately. This sounds controversial but in a way the shutdown was a blessing in disguise, because it gave me the opportunity to dive deeper into passions that I thought could only be a ‘side hustle’. I had my old page @ressarose from 2018-2023, amassing a following of over 100K but getting to that number didn’t come without it’s challenges. I didn’t really have a purpose to my content beyond banking on ‘pretty privilege’ which inevitably faded and that’s when I started losing followers by the 1000’s daily, my engagement going down with it. It took a good year or so of deliberating but I was back in that same position as I was in 2020, deciding how I wanted to really show up as a personal brand and taking into consideration what my top priorities were as a small entrepreneur and the co-creator of my reality. It was with that, that I made the hard but right decision to start all over with what is my main page now @whatwouldressado. Starting over, I knew the potential risks I was taking, however, to my surprise, switching to being a UGC creator has been more rewarding than trying to go the influencer route on my old platform. My worth is no longer unhealthily attached to the number of followers or likes that I have, and I can work with some of my favorite brands in a more consistent way (more than I ever have with my previous partnerships for @ressarose). There’s nothing that I regret about my first platform, from it’s beginning to it’s end, and there were so many lessons I took from it and applied to my new page which paid off in the long run. So that is what brings me to the present moment! I am content with the workload I have currently since back in June 2024 I started working as a private Pilates instructor at Equinox and took on another job as a social media assistant for the small consignment brand The Vintage Ave which was a mini dream come true! I may not have gotten into social media or the fitness industry the traditional way, and it may have taken me longer than others but I believe as long as you have the passion and drive and the humility to learn from those who have been in your shoes, then you are capable of making it into any industry and it is ok if one day, that passion turns into something else!
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
The three most important qualities that I think really attributed to my current level of success is a willingness to learn, good mentorship, and persistence. I would be lying if I said that I got here on my own with no one’s help. From my mentors, the support and encouragement of my family and friends, my faith in God and the universe, and watching other’s who were once in my shoes achieve the same goals I want to; I don’t think I would be where I am today without any of these factors. Lastly, you can NEVER go wrong with investing in yourself. Whether that is through inner work or hiring a coach who specializes in the areas you want to succeed in, it may require your time and money, but the return on investment is priceless!
Alright, so before we go we want to ask you to take a moment to reflect and share what you think you would do if you somehow knew you only had a decade of life left?
My biggest challenges have always been around love and money. Like we all have, I’ve experienced wounding around these two areas early on in childhood through my teenage and even some of my adult years, and I have been working to re-write the old limited beliefs via the To Be Magnetic pathway membership. In many ways I’ve made a lot of great strides, mainly in my inner dialogue, however I am still emitting a doggy-paddling behavior when it comes to taking the leap to move into my own apartment and/or put myself out their to start dating again. I don’t live in an area that is surrounded by people my age and frankly I wouldn’t want to date anyone who is living in my area because they would most likely be living with their parents (like I am) and I don’t want to be a hypocrite. Dating apps are at an all-time low and I just know deep down that I want to meet my soulmate organically after I’ve established myself as financially independent and living on my own. After reading my words over, I know it projects this belief that I am not enough, and this belief has shown up all throughout my life. I’m aware of it which is the first step towards healing, and I don’t know how long it will take until I can successfully rewrite this old belief, however I have hope that with what action I am taking in developing my financial status, my mental and spiritual, that one day this belief won’t completely control my life.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/whatwouldressado/
- Other: https://tiktok.com/@whatwouldressado?lang=en
Image Credits
all imagery is my own, Theresa Gomes, shot on my iPhone and posted to my socials @whatwouldressado 🙂
so if you or someone you know deserves recognition please let us know here.
