Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Thomas Edwards. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Thomas, so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.
Confidence and self-esteem, for me, were not inherent gifts but hard-earned treasures. Before telling the story, it’s important to speak to the difference between the two.
Confidence is what I tell other people about myself. Self-esteem is what I say to myself about myself.
My journey to developing these qualities was shaped by a blend of introspection, personal experience, the willingness, and the drive to become the man I knew I could be. And when that happened, I could make a positive impact, particularly in the lives of men seeking guidance in their personal and relational development.
The early days were challenging. I confronted my own insecurities and fears head-on, embracing each as an opportunity for growth. It all started by going on and meeting strangers for 30 straight days. Every setback and every triumph in my personal life and in navigating the complexities of communication, dating, and relationships became a learning experience.
I immersed myself in understanding human behavior, emotional intelligence, and the intricacies of effective communication. This not only enhanced my social lifestyle, it created opportunities to create professional opportunities but also bolstered my confidence and self-esteem.
Developing The Professional Wingman was a pivotal moment. It demanded not just confidence in my abilities but also an unwavering belief in the potential transformative impact of my work. As I coached others alongside continuing to improve my life, I found that my own confidence grew exponentially. Each success story of a client not only affirmed my methods but also reinforced my self-esteem. Witnessing tangible changes in others’ lives was a powerful affirmation of my skills and vision.
Today, after 400 marriages, the work I’ve done can speak for itself.
Perhaps most importantly, I cultivated a habit of continuous learning and adaptation. The ever-evolving landscape of relationships and personal development means that one must remain a lifelong student. This mindset has been crucial in maintaining and growing my confidence and self-esteem. Especially now as a husband and father.
I’d say becoming a dad created a deep, personal realization that I had a unique vision for a world where strong, authentic leadership and masculine integrity were the norm. My ambition was to ensure that my daughter would grow up surrounded by positive male role models. This vision served as the bedrock of my purpose and set me on a path of relentless self-improvement and learning.
Every new piece of knowledge, every insight into human nature, and every successful client transformation contributes to this ongoing journey. This mixes well with my internal fuel for continuous personal growth in all areas in my life.
The more victories I experience, the more confidence and self-esteem I have.
In essence, my confidence and self-esteem are the results of a symbiotic process: personal growth fostering professional success, and professional achievements reinforcing personal development. It’s a journey that continues to inspire and drive me every day.
Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
As the Founder of The Professional Wingman, I am deeply committed to guiding men on their journey towards personal and relational excellence. At the heart of my work is a unique blend of coaching services designed to address various aspects of men’s lives, from dating and relationships to personal growth and self-improvement. What’s most exciting about this work is witnessing the transformative impact it has on individuals. It’s not just about helping someone find a partner; it’s about fostering a profound sense of self-worth, confidence, and fulfillment.
One of the most special aspects of my brand is its holistic approach. We don’t just focus on dating techniques; we delve into the core aspects of what it means to be a strong, confident man in today’s world. This involves understanding emotional intelligence, enhancing communication skills, and fostering authentic connections. The results are often life-changing, not only in the realm of relationships but in all facets of our clients’ lives.
An exciting development for The Professional Wingman is the imminent launch of The Professional Wingman Podcast. This platform is set to broaden the scope of our conversation, going beyond the world of dating and relationships. We’ll be delving into various trends and untold stories that shape the modern man’s life. The podcast will serve as a valuable resource for insights, strategies, and real-life stories, touching on essential areas to help men become the best versions of themselves. Whether it’s about ambition, lifestyle, health, or personal development, The Professional Wingman Podcast aims to cover it all.
It’s important for our audience to know that The Professional Wingman is more than dating coaching; it’s a brand and movement towards redefining modern masculinity. Through our services, content, and soon, our podcast, we strive to create a community where men feel empowered, informed, and ready to take on the challenges and opportunities of life. We’re not just about finding a partner; we’re about building a life that resonates with success, happiness, and personal fulfillment.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
In retrospect, three key qualities and areas of knowledge have been instrumental in my journey not only with The Professional Wingman but also in life. These are Emotional Intelligence, Authentic Polarity, and Resilience.
Emotional Intelligence (EQ): The ability to understand and manage not just your own emotions but also those of others has been pivotal. EQ has been the cornerstone of my approach to coaching and personal development. It’s crucial in building meaningful relationships and navigating the complexities of human interactions.
This something I’ve found men to have the hardest time with.
Advice: For those early in their journey, start by practicing self-awareness. Reflect on your emotions, identify them by name, understand what triggers them, and observe how they affect your behavior. Then, gradually work towards recognizing these patterns in others. Books, workshops, and even mindful practices like meditation and ancient Stoicism can be incredibly helpful.
Authentic Polarity: This goes beyond just being honest. It’s about being SO true to yourself and others in your expressions and interactions that you’ get a polarizing response, repelling those who don’t align with you and those who almost fanatically do.
In the world of relationships, authentic polarity fosters deep trust and reliable connections.
Advice: To develop this skill, focus on being present in your interactions. Listen actively, respond thoughtfully, and express your thoughts and feelings genuinely, no matter what they are (respectfully, of course). It’s a skill that gets better with practice, so seek opportunities for meaningful conversations.
Resilience: The journey has not been without its challenges. Resilience – the ability to bounce back from setbacks – has been key. Whether it’s a personal setback or a professional hurdle, resilience has helped me stay focused and continue moving forward.
Advice: Build resilience by embracing challenges as opportunities for growth. Develop a support system of mentors, friends, or peers. This is where having a coach is a game-changer. Learn from failures and setbacks instead of being disheartened by them. Remember, resilience is like a muscle; it strengthens with use.
These qualities are not just vital for personal development but are essential life skills. For those starting out, my advice is to cultivate these skills with patience and persistence. Remember, personal growth is a continuous journey, not a destination.
Awesome, really appreciate you opening up with us today and before we close maybe you can share a book recommendation with us. Has there been a book that’s been impactful in your growth and development?
One book that has played a monumental role in my development is Stephen Covey’s ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.’ I first encountered this book at the age of 19 after a rough breakup, and it was the first personal development book I ever read. The impact it had on me was profound and lasting, particularly in how it transformed my approach to communication and understanding human interactions.
A few key nuggets of wisdom from this book that resonated with me are:
The Concept of Win/Win Situations: Covey’s idea of Win/Win or No Deal situations – scenarios where both parties benefit and find satisfaction – was a game-changer for me. It taught me that effective communication and negotiation are not about one person winning at the expense of the other, but about finding mutually beneficial solutions. This principle has been a cornerstone in my coaching approach, helping clients build healthy, balanced relationships.
Proactive Approach: The book emphasizes being proactive rather than reactive. This idea of taking control of our actions and being responsible for our responses to situations has been instrumental in how I approach challenges, both personally and professionally. The proactive approach alone changed thousands of my clients’ lives.
Begin with the End in Mind: This habit of envisioning the desired outcome of any endeavor before starting it has helped me stay focused on long-term goals and objectives, both in my personal life and in the growth of The Professional Wingman. Sometimes the end changes and that’s OK. I’ve evolved it to focus on who I want to become that experiences the goal I seek to accomplish.
First Understand, Then Be Understood: This principle has been pivotal in enhancing my listening skills. It taught me the importance of truly understanding others’ perspectives before seeking to be understood. This approach is vital in effective communication and has been a key element in my coaching philosophy.
Reading ‘The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People’ at that time in my life shaped my understanding of effective habits and communication strategies. For anyone early in their personal development journey, I highly recommend this book as a foundational read. It offers timeless wisdom and practical approaches that can be applied in every aspect of life.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://theprofessionalwingman.com
- Instagram: https://instagram.com/theprofessionalwingman
- Facebook: https://facebook.com/theprofessionalwingman
- Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/thomashedwardsjr
- Twitter: https://twitter.com/thomashedwards
- Youtube: http://youtube.com/@TheProfessionalWingman
