We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Valaine Shelby a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Valaine, thank you so much for joining us and offering your lessons and wisdom for our readers. One of the things we most admire about you is your generosity and so we’d love if you could talk to us about where you think your generosity comes from.
Growing up we were always on the borderline of meeting our bills. I remember having days, weeks, even months where we ate mostly rice and eggs, or my parents had to discuss which bills to skip, and we always bought all our clothes second hand. I never really minded except that I didn’t like eggs, but I do remember distinctly that there were several times that we only got groceries or made our bills because a mysterious envelope of cash appeared in the mailbox or a person from the church stepped in and covered a bill. It was always an incredible blessing when it happened, but it happened enough times to me as a child that I sort of internalized an expectation that this is how things worked: somehow, someway, needs would be met.
I think I always assumed on some level that the people giving were WAY better off than we were, and could easily spare the cash. It wasn’t until I was older, and one such instance happened for my parents after I moved out, and I knew who the gift giver was, that I suddenly realized that the gifts also came from other people to lived on the edge like we had. That the giver was giving out of a place of sacrifice and love. They might be a little ahead this month, we might be next month, and we help each other out. I knew my parents had always given freely in the times that they had the means.
So I always grew up with an ongoing example of sacrificial generosity, living as both the recipient, and the child of parents who practiced the same. I truly believe that if you wait for abundance to be generous, you will never be generous. Generosity is a mindset and we don’t need to be wealthy to be generous. We just need to be willing.
Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
At this point in my career, my main focus is on getting our first full-length feature off the ground. MY husband and I have shorts, music videos, and episodics under our belt, but the time has come to make the leap.
This process is not exactly the most lucrative on the front end. In fact it is quite a struggle, but that is what we believe to be our best next step for our business.
Getting here has already been a 8 year journey, with a lot of ups and downs. I’ve been working as an Assistant Director and in the Production Office of a wide variety of project types since 2017, after about a year of piddling around just making my own stuff. Not only did all those jobs pay the bills, but I genuinely love the support system of film making that is AD/Production. As someone with mediocre artistic talent myself, I love working with genuinely talented people to bring their vision to life. I have also learned a ton in these years of working for other people, that I’ve been bringing to the projects I produce. I really believe the best way to learn to is to work under someone who is a master at the craft.
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
I think the most important qualities to have for a career in film are work ethic, humility, and being debt-free.
Let me explain.
By work ethic, I mean both a passion for the work, but more importantly a willingness to work your absolute rear off. Film is long hours and sometimes literal intense physical labor (even for office positions! If your truck gets stuck in the sand and your whole transpo team is busy with something else, guess who goes out and digs it out of the sand?) Beyond that, there is an incalculable amount of non-compensated labor that you have to do for yourself. You have to seek education, whether through apprenticing with experts (best) or film school or volunteering on mini sets to get your feet wet. You have to spend a lot of time looking for jobs. Sometimes you want to learn or practice something specific and you have to just create that opportunity by producing your own piece. There’s watching videos of people explaining the jobs, going out and learning how to use equipment, classes, workshops, certifications, etc. Everyone’s exact needs will be quite different, but you have to be prepared to spend hundreds and thousands of hours working on yourself to be able to work for someone else.
This plays directly into humility. There is a very important phrase to remember in this industry: Know your worth. We mostly use it when coaching people to not undervalue themselves, and this is very important. What I am about to say in no way contradicts the importance of not devaluing yourself. Part of knowing your worth is knowing that when you first start out, you more than likely don’t have employable industry skills. You have to go earn them, meaning your hourly worth to a company might be “O.” This doesn’t mean volunteer for multi-million dollar companies. Certainly not. Instead, volunteer on student or training films, apprentice, take workshops, and make yourself employable! And finally, remember that even when you are employable, you’re going to be rejected. It is well know among actors that the rejection is tough and can’t be taken personally, but this is true for every job in the industry. They might not hire you because you don’t live as close by as other candidates, because someone else had a funny email subject live, or even because they hired the first resume that came in and never even looked at yours because they were in a hurry. Improve yourself, don’t take it personal, and move on. And finally, when you do get those jobs, you will be corrected constantly. Even if you had the best training in the world, mistakes happen or perhaps the show you are on just does it a little bit different. The best thing you can do is to not take it personally, understand that there is no need to defend yourself most of the time, and just keep going! Best phrase I ever learned was “You got it!” when told to make a change. Most of the time that is all that is needed. If someone has truly crossed a line with anger, slander, or insult, then that can be addressed appropriately, but most of the time things are just moving fast and a change is needed for some reason that has nothing to do with your skill.. Be humble, make the change, and enjoy the work!
Finally, debt-free. Most people I know who leave the industry do so because of debt. Those first couple, or even several years, work is extremely inconsistent, and even 20 years into a career a strike could happen that wipes out work for months on end. You have to be able to keep your monthly expenses low in order to be able to stick with it long enough to succeed. Don’t rack up student debt before entering the industry, don’t have a crazy car payment. Do your best to keep expenses down, and even when the time comes that you buy a house, give yourself a good margin in your budget line. Keep a savings account. Living below your means is good advice for anyone, but it’s essential in this industry because of the lack of stability. When you are choosing your living situation and education, choose accordingly.
As we end our chat, is there a book you can leave people with that’s been meaningful to you and your development?
The book “Me, Myself and Bob” was written by Phil Vischer, the founder of one of the fastest growing and successful 3d animation companies of the 90s. It is a book about failure, and I think everyone in the entertainment business should read it.
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