Meet Valerie Davis

We were lucky to catch up with Valerie Davis recently and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Valerie, thank you so much for opening up with us about some important, but sometimes personal topics. One that really matters to us is overcoming Imposter Syndrome because we’ve seen how so many people are held back in life because of this and so we’d really appreciate hearing about how you overcame Imposter Syndrome.
Imposter syndrome is definitely a human experience I continue to dance with every now and then in my work. As I have continued down my path as a licensed therapist and holistic practitioner, I have found that coming back to my sense of self and true authenticity has been incredibly helpful in letting me move through this feeling effectively. I can’t say I have completely overcome it, but that I continue to acknowledge those thoughts when they come up and have found some powerful ways to navigate it.

The thoughts around feeling like an imposter usually are a result of me sitting in comparison to others or unrealistic expectations that I place on myself. When I am able to keep this in mind, and catch myself getting sucked into these unhelpful thought patterns, I can then come back to my truth and my own experience. I remind myself that I do not need to show up as other practitioners do, nor is that the purpose I am here to live out. I come back to my own trainings, learned experience, and authentic way of showing up in these spaces. I return to reflecting on my personal values as a therapist and practitioner to remind me of why I love this work and why I show up in my own way. I know my methods and style will not be for everyone, and need to remind myself that if I show up authentically, I will be able to support those who need this unique approach while also honoring myself.

It took courage to let go of the scripts I was handed in graduate school, from past jobs, supervisors, or trainers and start to carve out my own path. I have had intense struggles with imposter syndrome when I launched my first independent, holistic events/ceremonies in the last couple of years, but I came back to trusting myself and my experience. It also helps that I have a strong connection to general trust in the universe that everything will work out as intended. Once I was able to break through this initial wall of fear, I was able to truly experience the freedom of showing up as my full self and feeling that be accepted by and helpful to others.

I also constantly throw myself into new material or experiences to continue learning and make sure to always be a student while striving to also teach others. This mindset keeps me from being too settled in what I already know and continuing to be open and curious. This then allows me to incorporate new information or practices into my work, which also helps fight those intrusive thoughts of imposter syndrome when they show up. I can only take people as far as I’ve gone; I value doing my own inner work, truly trying to “walk the walk” and strive to model through my behavior.

My biggest advice around this is to trust that if you can find the courage to show up authentically in your practice, whatever that may be, that you will find your people. No matter how small the impact, being able to show up in a way that allows even one other human to feel seen and supported is a powerful gift. You are not here to fill that role that others already have, and you do not need to show up and have the exact knowledge that they do. Own what you know, and own what you do not. People don’t need someone who has it all in order to feel supported, they just need you to be honest about where your talents lie and where your limitations are.

You are not an imposter if you are being your true, authentic self.

Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?
I provide holistic services to individuals and groups across the state of Colorado. My different offerings include individual therapy, individual or group breathwork services, reiki, as well as various holistic events that combine a variety of different healing modalities. I love working with individuals 1:1 combining these different offerings more long-term, or being hired by a group/company to come in to provide a one time service.

My favorite services recently have been my monthly Sacred Circle events where I combine plant medicine, breathwork, and another holistic offering such as yoga, sound healing, reiki or a fire ceremony. These are intimate gatherings of about 8 individuals in my work space in the foothills. These events have allowed me to combine different modalities that have been HUGE in my own healing journey and offer them to my community in an authentic way.

If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
I would say the three skills or areas of knowledge that were most impactful for me would be learning about my own values, understanding and knowing how to set boundaries, and developing various grounding practices.

My advice to others around this would be to spend time really exploring your own values, connect to what truly matters to you as you are right now. Let go of the ‘shoulds’ that show up in your life and recognize where other’s thoughts or beliefs have been placed on your or absorbed accidentally. Come back to what lights you up, and follow that feeling. I like doing a values card sort activity every year or so; I have physical cards, but there are plenty of free versions of this online. Starting here can then also help you understand your own boundaries and needs.

Once I was able to prioritize my values, this naturally guided me to shift how I was spending my time and energy. Learning the skills to actually communicate these boundaries can be challenging, and I have my lovely history of therapists and practices in graduate school to thank for my ability to do this successfully. Start small, and with people/situations who feel more safe or approachable. Build this skill slowly just as you would anything else if you feel overwhelmed by this. Setting boundaries allows me to have work/life balance and really only focus my energy on what truly fills my cup.

For grounding techniques, I would encourage everyone and anyone to find practices, movements, items, sounds or physical spaces that help them to get out of their head and back into their body. It can be easy to get trapped in our thoughts, and most of the time this isn’t going to be helpful in achieving our goals, or even feeling well. Take time to find ways you can engage through your five senses to slow yourself down and come back to the present moment. This can be with movement, smells, touching something soothing, or just breathing. I like to make sure to step outside and feel the sun on my skin, or the cold air on my face when I notice myself getting stuck in a mental loop. This is a good practice for general well-being or to help you with your professional goals.

Who has been most helpful in helping you overcome challenges or build and develop the essential skills, qualities or knowledge you needed to be successful?
I would say my own therapist has been the most helpful in supporting me in various areas of growth in the last couple of years. She has reminded me to come back to myself and my knowing when I get caught up in doubt, worry, or fear. She also is a somatic-based practitioner and has supported me in my journey to regulate my nervous system and release old traumas and reactivity that kept creating blocks in my process. She has helped me tend to myself as a whole, which has then allowed me to show up better as a therapist and holistic practitioner. I know I need to take care of myself and do my own work in order to be able to support my clients and community in the way I want to. I am very grateful for her, and the past therapists or other partitioners I have worked with along this journey to continue working on becoming the best version of myself.

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