We recently connected with Bara Mann and have shared our conversation below.
Bara, so many exciting things to discuss, we can’t wait. Thanks for joining us and we appreciate you sharing your wisdom with our readers. So, maybe we can start by discussing optimism and where your optimism comes from?
My optimism comes from understanding that ANY circumstance or situation can be turned into a gift or opportunity. This means that even if something feels bad, you have the power to turn it into something good.
During difficult moments it can be difficult to remember this, and hard to identify what the “good thing” might be. During those moments I remind myself that on many occasions, something that seemed terrible when it happened turned out to be a huge gift.
For example, I can recall a betrayal by a friend and a lover. I was ENRAGED when it happened and, worse than that, embarrassed. I didn’t see how I could face our mutual friends in that state. I searched for a way out and discovered a course on compassion.
That $20 course changed my entire life. I released my anger and resentment of the people involved and became more loving toward myself. I kept our mutual friendships, became more connected to all of humanity, and even stopped being terrified of snakes (a pretty nice bonus!)
If not for that compassion course, I don’t know if I ever would have left engineering to change lives instead, and that’s scary to think about. It was the betrayal and resulting pain that led me to this incredible life. If not for that pain, I don’t know where I’d be today.
I remind myself of that story and others like it to help me remember that life has the potential to keep getting better and better, and that difficult moments can be catalysts to making that happen. Knowing that, how could I not be an optimist?
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
I help women and queer people go from monotony and grinding to loving their days.
My training in various energy healing modalities and background in engineering may seem like a weird combo. But it’s led to a unique blend of intuitive wisdom and analytical thinking, a magical combination for guiding clients toward lives filled with joy, confidence, and inner peace.
I do so both through one-on-one work and group programs.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
Quality 1 is a growth mindset. I’m always interested in up-leveling and finding ways to improve. This mindset has led me to several decisions that were scary but life changing. For example, it caused me to leave a career I liked, which led me to finding one that I loved. And it led to my decision to move out of a city I loved, which led me to a town (and community) I love even more.
If you want to use a growth mindset to your advantage, you can simply ask yourself “How can I make this even better”? The language is important. You don’t want to operate out of a place of lack (for example, by asking “How can I fix this?”). When you deliberately choose language that feels inviting and supportive, you’re more likely to appreciate where you are in your process instead of judging yourself for it. You’ll also find that it’s easier to change your life in a positive way.
Quality 2 is the willingness to be proven wrong: I love to be proven wrong and am constantly open to having my mind changed. That allows me to connect deeper and more authentically, and it helps me relate to just about anyone. It’s also helped me change my trajectory on multiple occasions, and doing so has always worked out! If I’d held too tightly to my original beliefs, I wouldn’t be where I am today.
For number 3 I’ll go with a skill: Energy Healing. I am fascinated by the mind and love understanding my patterns and where they come from. And, sometimes I don’t want to do a bunch of analysis, I just want to get results. Developing my skills as an energy healer has enabled me to do that.
I can often release limiting beliefs and trapped emotions in minutes when it could take a full year of therapy to get similar results. It’s one of the things that really differentiates me as a life coach; my clients experience massive shifts, fast. (Don’t get me wrong, I’m not knocking therapy. I see a therapist myself and know that for many situations it’s more appropriate than coaching and/or energy healing. I also love a good energy healing shortcut when it makes sense.)
If you want to learn to do this work yourself, Dr. Bradley Nelson’s book The Emotion Code is a good place to start. Another great option is an in-person Reiki I training course. If you just want the results you can search online for a local healer or, you know, work with a life coach who has those skills (hiiiii).
What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Any advice or strategies?
When I notice that I’m feeling overwhelmed I activate the “Sage” (aka, best-self) region of my brain, which simultaneously reduces blood flow to the Saboteur/ survival regions.
I do this by focusing on my physical senses. I typically start by rubbing two fingertips together, bringing my awareness to those sensations. I may also notice the rise and fall of my belly with my breath, or listen to the sounds around me.
When you’re focused on the physical senses you can’t overthink. Your mind will slow down and you’ll feel calmer. In this state, you can effectively prioritize and make good decisions.
Anyone can do this without any special skills, but if you want to make it a habit I highly recommend the app-based Positive Intelligence ® (PQ ®) program. It gamifies incorporating these practices into daily life for 7 weeks straight until it’s a natural part of your life. My clients all get access to this program, or you purchase it directly through the PQ ® site.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.baraco.org/transformational-life-coach
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/baracobara
- Other: https://insighttimer.com/BaraMann https://www.baraco.org/sll
Image Credits
Jamie Radmacher and Danette Mitchell
