We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Caren Cooper. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Caren below.
Hi Caren , thank you so much for opening up with us about some important, but sometimes personal topics. One that really matters to us is overcoming Imposter Syndrome because we’ve seen how so many people are held back in life because of this and so we’d really appreciate hearing about how you overcame Imposter Syndrome.
To me imposter syndrome is partly due to crippling self doubt and then trying to be something you are not. You don’t believe in your self and you therefor comparing to others but also not truly loving who you are. You are yearning to be everyone but yourself. I lived like that for many years. I always wanted to be someone other than myself and because of that always compared myself to others. Everyone though I was fabulous and I didn’t believe it for a second.I never appreciate what I had, I was jealous of what others had. Always judgemental too.
And yes, I am a work in progress, but the trick is to be aware of the old patterns that come up. Self doubt and imposter syndrome will come up as you grow and evolve, how you deal with it from a newer version of yourself if the key.
A few years ago, I was in my own way and knew I was holding myself back. I embarked on a journey of self discovery and found Mindset work. Doing mindset work transformed my in many ways including understanding all the limiting beliefs I had, the stories I was telling myself. Truth is all these stories and beliefs stemmed from childhood. My little girl had emotions and feelings and those emotions and feeling stayed with her into adulthood. That little girl is the one who didn’t love her self. Now because of the work I do and teach i can go back to my little girl and help her heal. I feel my feelings, all of them good, bad, ugly and everything in between. I unbecame who I was and transformed into a new version of myself. That is what I do with why program Unscrew Yourself.
It’s also important to talk to yourself nicely. Mirror work is also an activity that helps. Talking to oneself and saying that i love you, while uncomfortable, totally works. My morning routine also consists of beliefs like I am learning to love and accept myself and I give myself a hug.
If you believe one way for so long, we can totally reverse it and believe a different way. Either way we have a choice. We need to give ourselves grace and compassion and stop beating ourselves up, Things take time.
Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
Brooklyn born and bred. Lived in New York my whole life. I grew up in a world where you were told go to college and get a job and so that is what I did. As a kid I loved cats and wanted to be a VET. In 9th grade I interned at a vet and in High school I was accepted into the Vet program. I even passed the vet tech test in 12th grade. I went to Brooklyn college and took science and it was a challenge for me. Rather than push through or try more, I gave up on becoming a Vet and decided to major in TV/Radio. After college I got a job in advertising as a sales assistant at a media rep firm. I am part of the few humans who actually had a job in their major. I loved working in the advertising industry, the work was interesting and we had a lot of fun. Lots of great perks too. Vacations, plays sports games. I even met my ex-husband in the industry.
Fast forward 10 years into my career and I have my daughter in August of 2001. and a few short weeks later NY was attacked. It was a crazy time for sure. On 11/1, I went back to work in Manhattan when my daughter was 10 weeks old and that changed everything for me. I hated leaving her, I hated being scared about commuting, I hated my ex for not making enough for me to stay home.
If you are reading between the lines you can see that I was very judgy, very much wanting things my way, totally playing the victim card and thinking that everything is happening to me. More on all of this later.
I worked in corporate on and off for 29 years, I had my second child a son in 2006. Thankfully as my children were getting older, there was more flexibility in the workplace. Still hated it though..
Fast forward to 2011, my dad dies unexpectadly and that would change the course of my life. I took up Zumba and in doing so, started caring about my health more. I quit smoking and decided to take charge of my health even more by saying yes to Isagenix. In saying yes to isagenix, I also said yes to personal development. So that person who was a victim and judgey and wanting was she wants was starting to dissipate and a new inspirational, positive, thinking things are happening for her person started to emerge. Both people are fun, weird and love Disco.
I was losing weight, feeling great and had a new perspective on life. I though maybe network marketing can be my way out of corporate.
The pandemic ended up being my way out. A few years into full time entrepreneurship, I found my self on the hamster wheel doing the same thing over and over and generating the same blech results. I knew that Hi i am the problem, it’s me. On a training call one night, a woman came on and coached us. She was from jersey and cursed. I was sold. Her mindet course and coaching tranfsormed me even deeper than i was before. It’s deep level work getting to the core of a person. Then reprogramming an rewiring ourselves and becoming a new version of ourselves. My new version ended het bad marriage, and is recovering from being a people pleaser, co-dependent and control freak. I had such a profound change that I knew this work was my calling.
I put my networking marketing career on hold and I am now a trauma informed mindset coach. helping women entrepreneurs and leaders overcome imposter syndrome and get out of their own way and be their authentic true selves. And shine as their badass unique self. My program is called Unscrew Yourself and I offer group programs as well as 1 on 1 coaching.
Honestly, its literally the greatest job I have ever had. I love helping others.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Advice: be open for the love of god, don’t think you know everything (you don’t). you may learn something or maybe a new perspective. And even if it’s something you heard a million times, listen cause you may hear things different.
We are all individuals there is only one us, be proud of that individuality wear it like a badge.
I love that I am a toys r us kid. have fun, be weird. None of us are getting out alive anyway.
I love my corny sense of humor. Laughter is truly the best medicine.
Lastly, DANCE its a great way to connect to your body and its just plain all out fun. Don’t worry about what other will say or do, it says more about them then it does about you!!! My personal preference is Disco, but you dance to what ever music you love
Okay, so before we go, is there anyone you’d like to shoutout for the role they’ve played in helping you develop the essential skills or overcome challenges along the way?
Tracy Litt. Her work is what changed me and the course of my life and why I am a Mindset coach now helping others.
Also shoutout to Mel Robbins, Tony Robbins, Ed Mylett and Jessie Lee Ward (R.I.P)
But truth is, having a mentor and coaches is amazing– the secret is that we have the power to change ourselves. So I am adding me to the mix as well.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/carencooper_/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/caren.s.cooper/
