Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Dorothy Hadley Joly. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.
Dorothy, so great to have you with us and we want to jump right into a really important question. In recent years, it’s become so clear that we’re living through a time where so many folks are lacking self-confidence and self-esteem. So, we’d love to hear about your journey and how you developed your self-confidence and self-esteem.
This is a great question. I had a generational fear based upbringing with some really creative folks who could get stuck in survival mode for various reasons. It definitely put me on a journey of searching for self confidence and self esteem. This upbringing was the kind when the disaster struck, people, not naming any names, would begin a salvaging process. We never seemed fully prepared as family, which brought on frustrations, blaming, and anger. We some how navigated though these obstacles which left their scars or unresolved issues. This led to not knowing how to manage my feelings properly. They did appear overwhelming and that is because these stuck feelings were literally stacking on top of each other.
Somehow as I was growing up, I naturally found my way to becoming an actress where I could freely live the life of others…or so I fooled my self into thinking.
As life would have it, I had to experience a few difficult and utterly beautiful things along the way to get to a place of confidence and self-esteem. Some of these situations challenged my faith in God, which would in turn ignite my journey and open me up to what the universe had for me. I then started my journey to finding mentors who believed in me, and who in turn taught me how to believe in me, which taught me that God/Universe believed in me too.
Note: So just as life may have brought people into our lives who brought misguided intentions, there can be even more people who give beautiful gifts and exemplify healthy life skills that will help us to create amazing confidence and self-esteem in order for us to flourish. Of course, we have to be willing to open the door and take a good look inside ourselves. It takes courage and perseverance to do so. I know if I can do it, so can you.
Side Side Note: Something I became aware of through several modalities in my life. Many of us are running around with other people’s stories in our lives, they are not our own stories. They could be possibly triggering you at times. They are from parents, people we admire, teachers, friends, families, or could be historical generational stories. They could possibly be inhibiting your life and preventing you from making progress forward. Find out what those subconscious stories are (paradigms) and release them through stretching, jumping, physiology, shouting, singing, animal noises, writing and exercise. And yes, some of these stories will be enhancing your life. It will be amazing when you figure this stuff out.
“Life happens for us, not to us.” – Tony Robbins
My life journey has led me through vocal lesson, singing in churches for 20 years, studied religion, taught spiritual matters, ran from spiritual matters, ran back to spiritual matters, volunteered, took acting classes from Spolin Improv classes, to Meisner, to Cinematic classes, got my black belt in Tae Kwon Do, worked as a receptionist in a middle school, opened a Youtube Channel called The Bluffton Local Nomad, received lead and supporting roles in 60 short films, commercials, still shot ads, supporting roles in 5 feature films, and gave me an amazing family with my husband.
Some of the people who have supported my journey and who led me were my family and friends, Acting Teachers, Mentoring Coaches, Pastors and Reverends who all challenged my very core: Master Spolin Improv Teacher/Actress/Writer/Director Jeanmarie Collins, Acting Coach/Actress/Mentor Cindy Hogan, Actor/Writer/Teacher/Mentor/Producer William Mark McCullough, Acting Meisner Coach/Actor/Photographer Anthony Paderewski, Director/Writer/Producer Chris Helton, an Episcopalian Reverend, Apostolic Pastors, Vocal Coaches Nancy Fontana from Bluffton, SC & Tom Hegeland from New Bedford, MA (RIP), Acting Coach/Actor/ Mentor Chad Darnell, Manifesting Mentor/Coach Michelle Grandy, Talent Agents Linda Eisen & Pam Hays from Coastal Talent, and of course my husband Nick, and sooooo many more.
“Life happens for us, not to us.” – Tony Robbins
Three coaches I would like to mention who had a powerful impact on me and got me over my self esteem issues are John Swanbeck out of LA, Jo Kelly, and Michelle Grandy.
- John showed me over the last three years, what I looked like on camera cinematically. We could see something was a bit off. I was still hiding and holding on…..self esteem issues were rearing their ugly little heads. You must understand the camera sees everything. Self Esteem issues are not necessarily good if you are an actor or actress, unless you know how to navigate that with in your performances. What I am saying is my authenticity was not fully realized, even at this age. Somehow with persistence and patience we got there. Thank goodness he saw some potential and did not give up on me. He continues lifted me and others up, regardless of what blockages can be seen. They can be overridden with practice, dedication, and perseverance.
The other day after a great class where everyone seemed to excel beautifully, I mentioned to him what I saw in a few others and how awesome it was to witness and also how much fun I had. He then said to me, “The very first time we worked together, I thought, “She has no idea what she could become.” Tonight I thought, “I had no idea she would become that.” Reader, I want you to know that made me cry, because I knew I had allowed underestimation and low self esteem to predetermine my creative process all those years, and even John had been aware of it, and now it is gone.
“Life happens for us, not to us.” – Tony Robbins
- Next, Jo Kelly and her 33 Day Actors Reset. Her on line sessions opened up my instrument fully with many different processes, mentally, emotionally, and physically. We learned that theses processes can be interchanged on a moment-to-moment basis. I found out what stories I had created and were subconsciously blocking. I found out what I was hanging onto bodily even as a baby! (Everybody is different) She taught me the method to letting it all go and to becoming more my more authentic in self. These lessons created a huge release and relief. I learned everything about me is uniquely ok. In fact, I am all that I need in order to be my whole, authentic self. I can use my imagination far more easily now and I feel absolutely safe. My instrument is open and ready to receive. This is reflected in my daily life as well as my work; I ended up having 5 supporting roles last year in feature films and along with perfectly suited roles in 2 short films. This after doing 50 short films, theater, commercials and still shots for ads over 15 years.
- Michelle Grandy, who is a Manifesting Motivating Coach, showed me another level to all this that I was kind of aware of, and yet had never put into practice. These are things we all do and yet some of us are not aware of it. We see and envision and feel what we want in our lives, which, mind you, should be used only for good. I am still learning about it all and I do wish to coach about it someday. I am still in an awareness of it all coming together. How does this all work with my Youtube page, acting, encouragement, and life experience? Well, I don’t know all the answers however the answers are revealing themselves day by day. It is really astonishing. Michelle has encouraged me to be as a woman of creative woman of grace, endurance, beauty, understanding, courageousness, empowerment, self-awareness, lovingness, kindness, assertiveness, insightful, patience, generous with time, healthy, wealthy, compelling, talented. It is definitely a really loving and great process.
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
I am a wife, Mom, and an Actress. I do so love see people heal from my work whether I play an awful or good person. I love the creative force of acting and the power that it can do to wake people up to possibilities of being better people. Yes, even when I play horrible people who feel vindicated, powerful, and fully justified, I do know ultimately something good will happen out of it. Somebody good will win, even if it is a simple as, “don’t do what that character did”. The creative process can bring so many possibilities of reflection to heal self.
We, as actors, can show one another, humanity, and what misguidedness, goodness, fun, quirkiness, loveliness, and craziness, will bring to one’s life and how that can or may affect(ed) humanity in the past, present, and future. Entertainment is an opportunity to use to let us step out of a present reality, to regroup, and to and step back in again refreshed, renewed, and stronger.
We as humanity have an opportunity to help one another to be better and more creative and to help love on our world. Let the arts do their thing and profoundly help awaken people to the many possibilities of life. Let us be our best creative selves to bring joy and goodness to one another. All we want to do as artists is to encourage one another to be our best and fullest potential selves every day to awaken that process in others. The arts will help one to get over insecurities and build self esteem.
My parents used to bring me to the symphony as a kid. The other day my husband and I went and it was beautiful and moving. At intermission we looked at sculptures along with many others. It was lovely and I even had small funny conversations with complete strangers, who did not feel strange. It was lovely to circle back around to it. I remembered what those sounds and visuals do for the human body senses, mind, and soul. And how people do so love to connect.
I will finally end with this, I encourage you to go to the theater for dramas, comedy, and musicals, and bring your children or grandchildren. Go to the movies and talk with your besties about the movie, read literature, and speak it out loud, memorize it, repeat it to one another, write your stories down, film it, revel in listening to music, read psalms or song lyrics, look at things and colors of the world and paint or draw what it feels like. If you are a cook, put colors upon colors of food on your dining room and kitchen tables. Take it all in with all your senses, the taste, texture, smells and vision of the food. Find a renewed passion in all of this humanity we are sharing together. We can come together with the arts and find a combined deep respect for each other’s stories, art, and life lessons. We can find possibilities of heartfelt goodness for one another regardless of choices, decisions, and stories that we have created. Sometimes we need a reminder on how to support one another here as we navigate this big creative process on earth.
“Life happens for us, not to us.” – Tony Robbins
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
There might be like 50 listed here……
- Expand your mindset with the help of others. If you want to be an actor or actress or not, find knowledgeable, kind, supportive, healthy, and creative mentors in your life. Look for the best in your area and then expand out further into the world. Who do the successful people go to? Find a mentors with methods that will resonate with you in order to give you a successful mindset.
- You want to expand your horizons and find out who you are, and also allow yourself to become more objective as you live your life. You may want to really observe other people’s lives, as well as read, read, and read. Read aloud books, magazines, and newspapers. and learn to use your voice properly. A vocal or acting coach can help you to use your voice and diaphragm properly. A great voice in film and on stage can be mesmerizing. Use accents and walk the around the house using your newfound accent. Travel and/or watch people from other countries get to know how we are the same and how we differ culturally.
- And by all means, have fun learning and playing. As one of my teachers used to say, if you are not having fun, then maybe you need to rethink and reassess your process. I’m not saying quit, I am saying find out what is pushing at you and that you need to release in order to become your authentic self.
Looking back over the past 12 months or so, what do you think has been your biggest area of improvement or growth?
My biggest area of growth has been in opening up my instrument and finding my authentic voice with the 33 Day Actors Reset with Jo Kelly. That is when my world ultimately opened to another level in my career. Even if you are not an actor, I suggest this class. It effects every area of one’s life. Amazing.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://dorothyhadleyjoly.godaddysites.com/
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/_dorothyhadleyjoly_?igsh=N2VzNXppM2l3dXI0&utm_source=qr
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/share/5wNNKTU5zfpd3gr3/?mibextid=WC7FNe
- Youtube: https://youtube.com/@theblufftonlocalnomad8767?si=1DZM0NzE2tt9O8g8
- Other: http://imdb.me/dorothyhadleyjoly
Image Credits
Arms crossed and maroon velvet top Photo Credit Valeria Tannuzzi At [email protected] Glasses Lifestyle photo Photo Credit Nancy McGregor Light blue top – me Evil looking photography playing Layla from “Blood Thirst” Look of concern is from Lifetime’s The Perfect In Laws now streaming on Hulu as Mrs Rae
