We recently connected with Jennifer Ibbotson Rodriguez and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Jennifer, thank you so much for opening up with us about some important, but sometimes personal topics. One that really matters to us is overcoming Imposter Syndrome because we’ve seen how so many people are held back in life because of this and so we’d really appreciate hearing about how you overcame Imposter Syndrome.
7 Simple Steps to Overcome Imposter Syndrome
Overcoming Imposter Syndrome is one of the most liberating and freeing activities anyone can achieve. Five Stars, Highly Recommended!
Growing up in Aspen, the daughter of a local celebrity, I recognized from an early age the different masks people wore for their different audiences. I noticed how the people in church behaved differently than they did at work. It made sense to me why kids were different with their teachers than their friends; but I could never understand why adults were not more consistent with who they pretended to be.
Honestly, in the 90s listening to my father’s clean and crisp region-less accent change to a slow southern drawl for the radio interviews he would do from the wall phone hanging in his Woody Creek kitchen was my final inspiration to never f*ke who I was in life, not even for the best job in the world!
As I left home, and the security of that little valley that felt so large before leaving, I commit to myself to be as authentic as I could be…no matter what. Not as easy of a promise to keep as I hoped it would be. Over the decades I had the opportunity to experience a lot of personal healing. As a multiple trauma survivor, I had to dedicate most of my life to figuring out how to “be okay with not being okay.” I had to overcome the fear of living.
It wasn’t until I was in the final years of my forties that I connected with my most authentic-self, who I lovingly call My Future-Self. It wasn’t until I learned, and committed to practicing, self-hypnosis that my most authentic-self began to emerge confidently and calmly.
Imposter Syndrome is the extreme results of a lifetime of feeling like an outsider. Imposter Syndrome begins in the child who feels they have to f*ke their behavior to fit in at school, with their friends, even to be acceptable to their own family. Imposter Syndrome cements itself in the psyche during the twenties and thirties when folks decide how to behave to succeed and how to behave to let loose and what it takes to navigate the in between. Imposter Syndrome becomes uncomfortably obvious by the time one is in their “adult” years navigating the responsibilities of being all grown up.
You see, up until becoming “the adults in the room”, there tends to be an unconscious belief that there is someone in charge, someone with more capabilities and intelligence to take the reins and make everything alright. As children grow up to recognize they have become the adults, but feel like they’ve been faking everything up until then, they have a crisis of consciousness. They suddenly recognize their masks and the shields they’ve maintained since they were children.
Berkeley University has an article that explains this tendency of inauthenticity in people stems from the fear of not fitting in, not being accepted, not belonging. They assert that people become inauthentic as a mechanism to stay safe. People hide parts of themselves and f*ke others so that they can fit in and be liked, so they can succeed. This is an unfortunate paradox because the more inauthentic anyone becomes, the less connection they feel with anybody. And, even more sadly, the more disconnection they create from themselves.
If this becomes the fabric of one’s entire existence, they never feel the authenticity of self that clarifies and cleanses their Imposter Syndrome out of existence. You see, people can experience Imposter Syndrome at work, or in parenting, in their creativity, and their hobbies, people can feel like an imposter in every single aspect of their lives.
Imposter Syndrome is simply an internal disconnection with self that is manifest from a life of faking who one wishes they were rather than being comfortable with who they genuinely are.
Thankfully there are 7 simple steps to overcoming this all too prevalent problem in our society.
1) Create a practice for mindful awareness to how and why you mask to fit in.
2) Know your core values and live in alignment with them.
3) Recognize your fear and how it shows up daily.
4) Cultivate deep self-awareness and courage
5) Embrace and grow from your perceived mistakes with humble comfort.
6) Refuse to judge others; accept everyone’s differences then honor your own.
7) Notice when you deflect and project, then strive to shine and reflect instead.
The easiest way to avoid Imposter Syndrome is simply to become Hypnotically Authentic. Because, it’s safe to be real!
Great, so let’s take a few minutes and cover your story. What should folks know about you and what you do?
The last few years have been truly exciting, since I first spoke with you and shared with your readers about my hypnosis practice. I am grateful for this opportunity to catch up!
As a Virtual Hypnotic Coach assisting clients from coast to coast in two countries, I recognized a stagnation in the healing process. Most folks were focused only on the past. As a budding enthusiast of both Quantum Mechanics and the Physics of Consciousness I realized something drastically had to change.
As individuals and as a society, we all need to recognize, our future is more important than our past!
Since becoming Board Certified and an Instructor with the National Guild of Hypnotists, my little coaching company has truly taken off in new and exciting ways. I am now able to certify heart-centered coaches to clarify the mindset of their clients to create profound and lasting change in their futures. I have also officially launched Future-Focused Hypnosis for both client clarification packages as well as professional hypnotist training programs to connect people with their greatest resource possible, their future-self.
This year The Authenticity Bootcamp is being added as an exciting new adventure into the joyful Future-Self connection. It is rolling-out initially for professional hypnotists and other healing-artists to operate their businesses from the most authentic space possible. Ironically, it is based on the customized work I have tailored for my clients over the years. It will be the basis of some exciting group workshops and retreats later this year, for clients wanting a more social environment to release their most authentic selves.
Hypnosis Haven & Ripple Effect Coaching is on a mission empower exhausted women to emerge, excited to be their most super-selves possible. If you are ready to expand the limitless experience of your existence, naturally and safely, then hypnosis is the modality you are seeking.
Become one with all of you!
There is so much advice out there about all the different skills and qualities folks need to develop in order to succeed in today’s highly competitive environment and often it can feel overwhelming. So, if we had to break it down to just the three that matter most, which three skills or qualities would you focus on?
Wow, that’s a really big question. I love it!
I believe the first would have to be, Continuous Curiosity.
Be curious, about everything, forever. As soon as anything is ‘known’ or ‘understood’ it stops being explored. Once exploration stops, stagnation begins. This is when complacency and arrogance take over and ignorance cements itself. Maintain a student’s brain in all things at all times and be even more curious than you were when “why” was your favorite question and “what if” was your adventurous motivation.
Secondly, know how to Mindfully Cultivate a Deep Awareness with Self.
Understand your feelings and emotions. Understand what makes you scared and what brings you joy. Develop skills of going deeper and recognizing root causes as a pathway to solutions rather than justifications and excuses for ongoing pain. Cultivate the pause between stimulus and response so mindfully that choice becomes easy, even in the face of difficult challenges.
And the third has to be Enjoy The Moment…no matter what.
We heal the past and connect with our future to comfortably and confidently enjoy our now. The Now is all that actually exists. The more we heal the more we accept the ever-changing transience of life, the easier it is to calmly connect with enjoying the moment we are living. No matter what it is. No matter our job or our relationship status, no matter where we live or how much money we have in our bank account…
You can enjoy the moment you are living. Your future-self wants that for you. Your future-self deserves that from you.
What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Any advice or strategies?
My very first advice is actually a strategy…avoid at all costs!
Now, for those that say avoiding overwhelm isn’t possible, for those who laugh at me, for those who want to claim I must not understand what overwhelm is by arguing, “If I could avoid it, it wouldn’t count as overwhelm!”
You are not alone. I get it.
Please, let me explain what I mean…
To avoid overwhelm is as simple as recognizing the feelings of it when it first begins and stopping them in their tracks.
Anyone can learn to recognize their feelings and emotions that lead to overwhelm and identify them earlier and earlier in the process, rather than at the middle or the end. The earlier one identifies the beginning of their overwhelm, the earlier they can engage their tools and tactics for stopping it in its tracks. The more this practice is made into routine the easier it is to notice and stop earlier and earlier.
Most of my clients find at least 3 of these 7 tactics as their go to solutions. Try as many as you like and see what works best for you.
Tools and Tactics to Engage When Feelings of Overwhelm Begin:
1) Exhale Breathing
2) Butterfly Hug, Tapping/EFT, Havening
3) Bi-Lateral Stimulation
4) Necker-Cube Flipping
5) Walk Outside, Feel the sun, Listen to water flow
6) Hum, Sing, Dance, Laugh Out Loud
7) Practice Self-Hypnosis, Work with Affirmations, Meditate
Contact Info:
- Website: https://hypnosishaven.com
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/COHypnosisHaven
- Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-ibbotson-rodriguez
Image Credits
Melanie Moreno: photographer Graphic Creation by Jen in Canva Pro
