Meet Jessie Kates

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Jessie Kates. We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Jessie, so good to have you with us today. We’ve always been impressed with folks who have a very clear sense of purpose and so maybe we can jump right in and talk about how you found your purpose?
Questions like these always light me up from the inside out. First and foremost because I love getting deep with people and learning more about someone beyond the superficial surface of “where are you from?… what do you do?” The other reason I love talking about purpose is because I truly believe finding it to be a secret weapon for longevity. So it always excites me to talk about purpose for it seems to unlock meaningful bonds of connection with one another and helps folks have a guiding light in life to walk a long fulfilled road.

I think so many of us at one time or another have pondered inwardly, “what is my purpose in life?” Often a void of silence echos back. Many of us have been lead to discover our purpose in the accumulation of things or the advancement on the preverbal ladder at work.

For most of my 20’s – I followed this conditioned pattern too. I looked outside myself for my purpose. I thought it hid in a better job or nicer things. As I climbed the “ladder” in my first career in hospitality, I rarely stopped to inquire if this job was filling me up in a meaningful way inside. I always just looked at my bank account and the items in my closet and at times even looked to my social life to see if I was checking the boxes of “winning” at life.

Deep down none of these things really brought deep value to my life. Its nice to have mice things, sure. It brings a sense of security to be able to pay y0ur bills, yes. But working without my work being purpose driven was leading me to boredom and burn out.

It took the sudden death of my father in law in my 30’s to get a much needed shake up on the trajectory of my life. My outlook turned on a dime. Driven by tragedy and heartbreak the deep longing in my soul (that I believe we all have) came rushing up to the surface. Fueled by the known ache of my own mortality and the remembrance that life sometimes ends suddenly – I kept asking myself, in those early days on grief – “what am I doing all of this for?”

As I sat with a shifted perspective that my life had no deeper meaning beyond achieving superficially, I started to think about the way my life was crafted up until that point. There were things, but these things didn’t provide deep fulfillment. I had a great job, but this job was just a means of buying nice things, which I had been conditioned to believe was my purpose up until that moment.

If my life can change in a minute, or end in a flash and all I have to show were a few killer pair of trending high heels in my closet – was it all worth it?

The more that question sank in, the more I saw that my life was focused on the wrong agenda. The purpose of life was not to get as rich or successful as possible to the detriment of my mental, physical, emotional and spiritual well-being. Honestly I had no idea what the purpose was.

The next several years of my life were focused on truly inquiring inwardly. What brought me peace, what made me feel safe, what felt good in my body and mind. AT this point I also had a baby girl and I would also ask myself daily what do I want to model for her?

I started taking better care of my complete wellbeing – body, mind soul. This lead me naturally into the wellness space. Practices like yoga, meditation, mindfulness really began to speak to me in ways I couldn’t articulate, but knew deep down were helping me alchemize my desire to reorient my life to have a deeper purpose.

I began getting trained in these practices so I could share with other how deeply they were helping me and began using the sharing of these practices to open up authentically with folks about my journey. I shared my struggles, I “kept it real.” I didn’t realize at the time that sharing yoga in this way was not the norm. Most yoga teachers don’t come in a talk about having a bad day. Most get up on a bedazzled high horse of toxic positivity, declaring that they have it all figured out and life is rainbows an butterflies.

For years I kept sharing life through the lens of yoga with folks in my classes and for years I kept hearing how much this truly helped folks. I kept keeping it real and offered a shifted perspective. That life wasn’t always awesome, that we aren’t perfect, but this practice can help us meet ourselves with more grace and acceptance affording us the bandwith to ultimately do the same for others.

The more I shared in this way – the more it touched people’s soul in a way they never knew they needed and the more and more folks shared their authentic messy lives with me. Together we shared our stories, laughed and celebrated each others triumphs and shed tears together for one another’s tragedies.

At this point in my yoga career – I was becoming known in my community and would commonly get interviewed to share my unique perspective and I would get asked things like “what got me out of bed in the morning?” In the answering of these questions I realized it as these connections I was making with my community. It was hearing how my teaching was brining profound life changing shifts to people lives. I realized – this is WHY I keep going, never burning out. No longer calling what I do “work”

I realized my “work” had become purpose driven. So I jumped head first into that and let it lead the way. I opened SHIFT YOGA studio in 2018 and I now own a thriving business rooted in this purpose. To share the ups and downs or life through the lens of yoga to help folks truly shift their life from the inside out. My purpose is to be of service to others for supporting them fills me with endless fulfillment and knowing the “work” I do in the world is making an impact on individual lives and collective communities ie better than any killer pair of high heels money can buy.

Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
I am the proud guardian of a wonderful community at SHIFT YOGA Studio in Fulton Maryland. The most exciting thing about this place goes way deeper than doing yoga. At SHIFT we get deep into life together. We take the teachings and practices of yoga as a way of life and offer them to our community as a salve for your body, mind and soul. We look at things different than most yoga studios in our area. We aren’t concerned about how many “butts in the seats” but focus on how we meet people on the road of life. We focus on building relationships, fostering bond of connection to build a vibrant, authentic community that truly has each others back. We LOVE big and it shows. We are continuously awarded local accolades and our studio gets named the BEST OF year after year by the people because we go beyond just being a business trying to make money selling yoga. Instead we SHIFT it. Our brand is deep, personal, authentic and it goes beyond doing yoga. Rooted in yoga – it’s about waking up together to the magic of how deeply intertwined out humanity is and how deeply we need each other to truly be happy and free!

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
For me my journey is fueled by life and its ups and down and using that as this inspiration for how I show up and support folks. So for me I would say #1 would be seeing your life as your curriculum. Using each morsel of your experience as threads of connection with others. #2 A big skill for me over the years has been learning how to cultivate awareness of the present moment and bring curiosity and care to what is happening right now. #3 I think the quality of tenderness has been profound for me. Tenderness towards myself, but more importantly being tender towards others. Life can be harsh, people are certainly harsh. I have found tenderness to be a super power to help diffuse tension, foster trust and safety and build meaningful connections.

What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Any advice or strategies?
REST! Rest is your birthright and not something you have to earn. Let me also be clear that and I don’t mean take a nap.

I mean unplug, breath, sit still with a journal, take a coffee/tea or snack break and just sit with no phone and be for a bit. Take breaks in between meetings, emails, projects to chill out and do something restful like lay down, stretch, take a short walk, listen to a song you are digging lately. Put down the grind, the hustle, move slow, be here right now.

My life before finding my purpose was fueled by hustle culture conditioning. I now know I am no good to my family and the world if my nervous system is not regulated. So REST, REST, REST frequently and often. The world needs more of us RESTED to help carry humanity forward.

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