We were lucky to catch up with KayleighAnne (Kiki) Stanton recently and have shared our conversation below.
Hi KayleighAnne (Kiki), so happy you were able to devote some time to sharing your thoughts and wisdom with our community. So, we’ve always admired how you have seemingly never let nay-sayers or haters keep you down. Can you talk to us about how to persist despite the negative energy that so often is thrown at folks trying to do something special with their lives?
Thank you so much for having me!
Hmmm! This is such a good question! There’s not a perfect answer, if I’m being honest. I’ve dealt with a lot of negativity in my life, both from people around me and from myself. I’m no pro at self-confidence, believe me! And, since authordom is such a rigorous, challenging, and unusual road to walk… well. Let’s just say I’m still working on persistence, and the Lord has been so good at picking me up when I fall.
One thing I have definitely realized over the years is a simple, but powerful, thing. “I don’t have to explain myself to anyone.” It’s true! Unless, of course, you’re convicted of a crime, by which case explanation is the best way to go. Haha! But, all jokes aside, I definitely have found myself trying to explain myself a lot over the years. Whether it’s to people who don’t understand why I write sci-fi, or who think fiction is a waste of time, or people who think my time would be better served by pursuing a six-figure career. Whatever it is, I’ve probably heard some fraction of it over my life.
I can’t remember when I first realized it, or if it was a gradual realization, but I don’t owe anyone an explanation. Other than Jesus, I don’t owe anyone answers, and I don’t have to explain my career decisions. As long as I’m not convicted against it, and am careful to walk the road I’m called, that’s enough!
“It’s not their life,” an author friend told me several years ago (paraphrased). “It’s okay if they don’t get it.”
And that’s true! In a materialistic and money/power/success-obsessive world, creatives will often be misunderstood and under-appreciated. It’s not my job to get the world to understand why I do what I do. It’s my job, though, to speak regardless!
Second, I firmly believe that anyone and everyone has a distinctive purpose in life. That’s non-negotiable. And, as Pablo Neruda once said, “writing is like breathing.” I couldn’t fathom holding my breath for the rest of my life, so I write like I breathe. It’s a part of me. It’s embedded in my purpose, a beautiful task given to me by a Creator who never makes mistakes. For me, that’s reason enough. I don’t need the world to understand, I don’t need success, and I don’t need a perfect rebuttal to the nay-sayers. I simply need to do what’s ingrained in me. Write and breathe. I imagine the rest will take care of itself in time!
Thanks for sharing that. So, before we get any further into our conversation, can you tell our readers a bit about yourself and what you’re working on?
In a world quickly growing post-modern, it’s tough finding shoulders to lean on. I mean, we have plenty of flaky friends, forced relationships, and sticky “truths” shoved at us on a daily basis. As a preteen who loved stories, my life was no exception. In fact, opening up random books in between library stacks often displayed the same depravity and confusion the real world carried so well. I found it difficult to find good fiction that showcased the depravity of the world with the clarity that the light overcame.
Even as a young kid, that became my mission. I’ve been living that way ever since. In fact, as I’ve gotten older and surpassed my teen years, that conviction has only gotten stronger. I write, now, for a confused world, but also for myself. After all, I struggled with heartbreak, depression, and suicidal thoughts, and everything that might make someone lose heart.
But I haven’t. And I’m still here.
I want to tell the world why. I want to pen novels for teens and young adults in a shattered and confusing world. I want to showcase the darkness and the pain, but I don’t want it to end there. In fact, I make it my goal to rip my own heart open with the novels I write that way, with my heartstrings, others might find healing in the ink. It can be quite exhausting, but I’ve found it to be worth it. Again and again.
Currently, I’ve found it easiest to speak in the medium of science fiction. I’m geared towards young and new adults and hope to inspire them to both fight and hope for brighter things through penning tales of spectacular worlds, rogue technology, and the underdog.
If you had to pick three qualities that are most important to develop, which three would you say matter most?
Oh wow! This is a tough one. Let me think…
I would absolutely say, first and foremost, that living life is the best experience any author can have. I know we have a reputation to be hermits; hiding in our cabins in the woods. Perhaps that’s true for some of us. Yet, I would argue that it shouldn’t be. If authors want their work to matter, and to maintain relevancy in a quickly-changing world, they have to live life. Go on adventures. Meet new people. Make big mistakes, even.
As the oldest daughter in a sizable family, I had no choice but to live life on the constant. While I certainly had my years where I didn’t appreciate it (that’s a whole other story), I grew into it. Now, I’ve found that my writing is best served when I live in locomotion–whether that’s by going to the mountains, laughing with friends, or even writing out at the kitchen table so I’m surrounded by noise.
Living life, and living it well, is the most important skill any author can have.
Reading well and reading wide is a big one, too. As a college student, I certainly don’t do well with this. However, I have found it to be so important. Not only will your writing style improve, but your knowledge of the length and breadth of fiction will, as well. Do not just read in your chosen genre, either. Do you write fantasy? Pick up some sci-fi. Pick up westerns, even! You never know what might inspire you, and it’s best to drink in as much of this beautiful world as we can!
Lastly, and this is more abstract, but don’t let people box you in. I’ve always been a bit more rebellious. That’s just my nature and the way I was brought up. However, I have found it to be so self-serving in the world of novelists. Pick up those side projects, even if people say they are a waste of time. Write that book, even if people have said they’ve heard it before. And, above all, be bold enough to experiment in different genres. That’s a biggie. I did my fair share of attempting to box myself in to one genre, and it ended in burnout and exhaustion. Never again!
What would you advise – going all in on your strengths or investing on areas where you aren’t as strong to be more well-rounded?
Oh wow. This question!
I think it’s a bit of a double-edged sword, if I’m being honest! We all have been given unique gifts and strengths, and that’s not something to be ignored. However, it can become easy to focus solely on our strengths, and this results in loss. If we only ever do what we’re confident in, our lives and our circles will stay small and unbroken.
This goes back to my earlier response, as well. An author will only be as good as the life they live. A teacher only as good as the children she aids. And a surgeon only as brilliant as the people he loves. We are not 2D puppets that can sing one song and exit stage left. We are living, breathing, blood-pumping beings with dynamic and depth and jigsaw-puzzled realities. In order to be good at something, you have to be willing to try, and fail, at anything.
For example, I’m going into junior year at Cedarville University. There, I’m studying International Studies with a minor in Middle Eastern studies. This looks like studying politics, culture, and struggling through four semesters of Arabic.
When I tell people I’m an author, one of the main questions I get is some variant of, “why aren’t you going to college for English/Creative writing?” Well, my answer is some form of the above. I don’t plan on making writing a full-time career. It’s not because I believe it impossible, or I don’t think I could do it. Rather, it’s because I want to be more than just a writer.
I want to be well-rounded in politics, culture, and language. I want to work with people. I want to love our broken world the best I can, and I believe that’s best served by me studying International Studies at Cedarville University. Not only will this make me a better humanitarian, as a whole, but it will also make me a better writer. By studying culture, I can better respect them. By studying politics, I can better write them into fiction. To take it one step further, by going to the gym and practicing weightlifting, or blogging on Instagram, or experimenting in the kitchen, I am making myself a better person by honing skills, learning to adhere to deadlines, etc etc. You catch my drift?
To assume anyone can be only one thing is to disregard how complex they’ve been created to be. No one will ever just be an author, a musician, or a doctor. They will also be a father, or a friend, or a cook, or a world-traveler. That’s part of what makes humanity so beautiful! Therefore, all of our respective careers and dreams are best served by strengthening both our strengths and our weaknesses. We must lean into how dynamic we can be and dare to try new things and make mistakes! Even if it doesn’t work out or if we fail, I truly believe we will be better for it.
Contact Info:
- Website: www.kestanton.com
- Instagram: @k.e.stanton
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