We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Michelle Custer a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.
Hi Michelle, really happy you were able to join us today and we’re looking forward to sharing your story and insights with our readers. Let’s start with the heart of it all – purpose. How did you find your purpose?
Unfortunately, tragedy led me into my purpose. In March of 2015, my pillar of light, Leisa, who was a mother to me, died unexpectedly and my world shattered. I had been existing every day, attempting to do what society says you do as a woman; you grow up, you get married, and you have kids. There wasn’t as much emphasis on finding a career you love or being passionate about anything in life. Most people do what society expects instead of what is deep within their soul, the fire that truly ignites them within, and what gives them a purpose in this life. Losing the most significant person in my life, who spent every day living her best life and truly loving others, taught me that I needed to also live my best life. The fact I wasn’t married with kids at 35 didn’t define who I was as a woman. I was so much more than I realized in that moment, and I felt like a complete failure because I wasn’t following my family or society’s protocol. Over time, while on my healing journey, I realized that I was in fact an amazing person with so much light to offer others by lifting them up, using my voice to share my authentic truth, and inspiring others to seek within themselves and start living their life with purpose and not just existing. I genuinely love sharing my journey in life to inspire others to realize their own gifts to share with the world. So, the most difficult tragedy of my life led me into the most magical part of my existence, and I wouldn’t change any of it. Turning my pain into purpose has really been a gift for my life and the goal is to inspire others through sharing some of my darkest parts of my journey, to give them hope.
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
Professionally, I am an Event Planner and Travel Director that loves coordinating all the aspects of corporate events and conferences, helping to create an exhilarating experience for the attendees and the staff on site. I love the energy of the events I work. You never know who you are going to meet or what you might learn from them, or maybe even gift them by simply greeting them with a smile. I am very passionate about holistic healing, crystals, spirituality, self-love, self-care and God. I also enjoy collaborating with holistic healers to help educate people on the beauty life offers through even the most difficult experiences we face. I believe that when we survive something, it is because we must be the light to help others through something just as difficult, to give them hope. Since Covid, there is a much bigger emphasis on mental health. I would love to integrate holistic healing experiences into the corporate world to give those that are afraid of the unknown a chance to better understand and learn about the freedom of releasing trauma. I have had such an incredible healing journey that I want to sprinkle it to everyone in the world that is open to it and share whatever I can to help them through their journey.
I recently have started acrylic painting and pours. I haven’t painted since childhood art class, until July 2021, with my father who is now in heaven. We went to a Dementia event that was a painting experience. It is a memory I cherish of my father, especially since I just lost him in April 2023. In July of 2023, I went to Hobby Lobby and bought supplies to paint, and started doing meditative art. It is amazing what I create; I never know what it will be until the end. I don’t sit down and think about it, I literally listen to my intuition and whatever is created comes to life. I thrive on mixing colors, and I am very meticulous in the way I use the brushes. I write positive intentions and affirmations on my canvas, then I paint. I believe my art is a method of healing myself and that it can help others to heal also if they decide to invest in it. I like to post it on my social media to see what others see intuitively in my paintings. It has become a newfound passion I never imagined I would experience in this life.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
I have always been Love. Everything I do, everyone I meet; it all starts from a place of love, regardless of anything else. I believe that most of my life I lacked the love that I have spent over giving through the years. It is a common theme when you don’t get the love and attention you deserve starting from childhood. I now see the unhealthy parts of it, but I still always revert back to Love. The difference is now I don’t give my energy to those that don’t appreciate it or respect the boundaries I have. Truly cherishing those that love and care for you, genuinely, who are your biggest cheerleaders and want you to win, that don’t make it a competition, keeping those people close. When you heal all the things within you that stem from “lack” you realize that there is abundance for us all. What is meant for you will not miss you, I promise. You are an unlimited being of God (Universe, Source, Spirit, a Highter Power, whatever you believe). Life is not a competition, it is a journey, and how you react to the curve balls will determine everything, if you let it. Our mind causes all of our suffering, that was one of the hardest lessons I learned. Get out of your head, believe in yourself, and let go of what others think. Sometimes you even have to let go of the people you call family, because they are the most toxic beings in your life. Also, another very important lesson I had to learn; Love yourself first, always.
What was the most impactful thing your parents did for you?
One of the greatest gifts in my life has been realizing that the difficulty I had with all three of my parents (mom, dad and stepmom) has helped me become the genuine, kind, loving, caring and beautiful soul I am today. I had to understand that my parents were unhealed. They came into this life with wounds that never healed, they passed those wounds to me, and I am the one that must break the ancestral pain to help generations before us and after us, truly heal and give them the peace they all deserve. It is a very significant role that I agreed to before I came into this life. It has been dark, sad, lonely, and at times it felt completely hopeless. It has created a burden that has left me as the black sheep of my family; being judged, persecuted, and even hated to this day. I know my journey and I know my worth. The moment I realized the gift I am giving to my entire family, the freedom and peace that they never had, it made it all worth it. I have done more healing with both my mother and father since they have transitioned then I was ever able to do while they were here on earth. I craved my parents love and approval for my whole life, especially my father. I spent a lot of years chasing relationships to fill the voids within me, only to realize I had everything I ever needed within me. My father had to transition to finally show up for me like he never could do in life, and what a gift that has been. I have a YouTube channel, Watch Me Shine Brighter, that has several videos on healing with my father prior to his death and even after. I also discuss the devastation of losing my mother. She had no financial plan setup, so I lost her and had nothing but faith and good people to get me through a terrible situation. My narcissistic stepmother has been the most difficult relationship of them all. It was the most toxic, and the most emotionally abusive relationship of my life. I discuss forgiving her and realizing what a gift all the negative things that transpired through the years were in my life. My parents created me to be who I am, and I now understand why. I am so grateful for every disappointment and heartbreak. Learning to forgive is one of life’s greatest gifts. Once you realize your parents were unhealed and they didn’t know any better, it allows forgiveness. That does not excuse their wrongdoing, but it definitely helps to forgive them whether they are part of your life or not.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://northernstarjourne.wixsite.com/northernstar53
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/watchmeshinebrighter/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1182284495631403
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/michellecuster/
- Youtube: https://youtube.com/@watchmeshinebrighter
- Other: Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/@watchmeshinebrighter Writing Blog: https://medium.com/@watchmeshinebrighter
