Meet Nicole Blessing

We caught up with the brilliant and insightful Nicole Blessing a few weeks ago and have shared our conversation below.

Hi Nicole, thank you so much for opening up with us about some important, but sometimes personal topics. One that really matters to us is overcoming Imposter Syndrome because we’ve seen how so many people are held back in life because of this and so we’d really appreciate hearing about how you overcame Imposter Syndrome.
I don’t think anyone ever fully overcomes imposter syndrome. It’s something that you learn to manage and develop coping techniques. I didn’t have a supportive environment growing up. My family was the type who constantly criticized and found fault with just about everything I ever did. I was definitely not the golden child. When you come from that type of background, you have a tendency to be riddled with self-doubt. Whenever I accomplished a goal, I was told that I just got lucky. My siblings were particularly cruel in that respect. My significantly older sisters would constantly tell me that if I could do something, then anyone could, and nothing I did was particularly special or difficult. My parents’ favorite thing to tell me was that no matter what I did, there would always be someone else better. For a long time, I believed them. I truly bought into the rhetoric dispensed by people who never did anything noteworthy with their lives. I was terrified that it was only a matter of time before everyone else found out how incapable I was.

I was fortunate that I found my husband. He was the first person who believed in me and my abilities. He showed me that I didn’t have to put stock in the constant criticisms my family made about me. I really thought about how I had been conditioned to feel anxious and inferior as a child because that allowed my adult sisters to feel better about themselves. I strictly avoided contact with them, which helped a great deal. The mentality that you should put family first and try to get along no matter what is toxic. Just because you are related to someone doesn’t mean that you can have a healthy relationship. Sometimes you need to cut people out of your life for the sake of your own mental wellbeing. Not having a support system as a child, I became hyper-capable, and was finally able to acknowledge that.

Now I celebrate wins no matter how small. I remind myself that I put a lot of work into anything that I’ve ever accomplished and that it’s not just random luck. It takes constant effort because it is easy to slip back into old patterns. On a lighter side, childhood trauma does make for great comedic instincts.

Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
I’m an actor, model, and comedian. I’m originally from Minneapolis and relocated to LA about 7 years ago with my husband, Fred, and our poodle, Éclipse. I was looking to expand my artistic career. Since moving, I’ve gotten roles in several film projects, and I’ve developed a love of comedy. Now I regularly perform at different venues all over LA.

I produce a monthly comedy show, Los Uff Das, along with my husband and our friend, José Oyola, at Oeno Vino in Atwater Village. We strive to create a diverse lineup with comedians from different backgrounds, cultures, and points of view. We intentionally have fewer comedians, so everyone gets longer sets. I’ve also been creating my own content. I recently started releasing it under the YouTube channel Los Uff Das – https://www.youtube.com/@LOSUFFDAS. It’s humorous but with an underlying message.

This past June, I was in the Laugh Riot Grrrl Comedy Festival at Tao Comedy Studio. For the last nine years, Bobbie Oliver has produced this Punk Rock Intersectional Feminist Comedy Festival. The ideology is to encourage more women to do comedy and to support the ones who do and their allies, providing a safe space for women+, BIPOC, LGBTQIA+, non-binary comics, comics with disabilities, and other marginalized voices to create and grow. It’s very inspirational and I feel grateful to have been a part of it. In August, I will be appearing in the Burbank Comedy Festival at Flappers.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
First, learning to believe in myself and my own abilities was really key to not only pursuing an artistic career in an extremely competitive industry, but also for improving my overall wellbeing. It really is true that if you don’t believe in yourself, no one else will. Just like you should always vote for yourself! Second, perseverance has also been an instrumental quality. There’s a lot of rejection, ups and downs, and unexpected setbacks. You have to remind yourself that nothing lasts forever and learn to regroup. Finally, you can’t take yourself so seriously. You need to make time for self-care and to have fun. Find like-minded people and develop long-lasting friendships. Be supportive of your friends on their journey. Always try to be kind because you never know what someone else is going through. People remember kindness no matter how much time has passed.

All the wisdom you’ve shared today is sincerely appreciated. Before we go, can you tell us about the main challenge you are currently facing?
It’s difficult for people to hire you if they don’t know you exist. Currently, I’m working on promoting my existing work and leveraging social media to foster a larger audience. It’s a challenge to create something that will attract new attention when there’s so much out there. I’m focusing on quality over quantity.

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