We recently connected with Robert Torres and have shared our conversation below.
Robert, thanks so much for taking the time to share your insights and lessons with us today. We’re particularly interested in hearing about how you became such a resilient person. Where do you get your resilience from?
I get my resilience from my mother, Iris. She went through several miscarriages before she became pregnant with me. It takes a great deal of perseverance to go through such heartbreaking trauma time and again, always hoping that each pregnancy would go to term. She endured a rocky and turbulent marriage with my biological father, a Vietnam veteran, before finding the strength and courage to leave for the sake of myself and my brother. She worked hard to raise me and my brother on her own until she ultimately remarried. She always gives 110% of herself in all she does, and is always willing to help others in need, even at the expense of her own emotional and physical wellbeing.
Thanks, so before we move on maybe you can share a bit more about yourself?
I was born in Puerto Rico in 1980, but lived in New Jersey most of my life. I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age, and have been given a great deal of help from teachers and educators all the way until I graduated college. I loved to read and write, I am a huge fan of sci-fi/horror/fantasy genre, and in particular I love critical analysis of media. I am interested in examining things and giving legitimate reasons as to why I like or dislike something, but always try to make it clear that any opinion made is meant to promote critical thinking, nothing more. My main job is as a Service Care Provider, helping the developmentally or physically disabled. Whether its just to spend time with them, talk with them, take them out into the community, help prepare meals, etc., it feels good to help others to help themselves. People have helped me during my formative years, and it feels good to ‘pay it forward’ by helping others. I enjoy the acting craft, and have done quite a few theatrical productions over the years from ‘A Christmas Carol’, ‘Beauty and the Beast’, ‘The Crucible’, ‘Clue’, and have always had a wonderful time in the creative process of creating characters and collaborating with other creative types. Community theater is often the best sort of theater, because it does provide a communal atmosphere of camaraderie, friendship and family. The idea being that everyone is working together to make whatever show they are producing the best that it can be in every department: acting, directing, set design, costuming, etc.
One of my acting dreams is to do Shakespeare, and I nearly had that opportunity when, in August of 2022, I was initially cast as the lead in a production of ‘MacBeth’. However, not long after rehearsals began I was forced to relinquish the role due to a germ cell cancer diagnosis that ultimately resulted in the loss of my left leg. Throughout the months of September, October and November, I spent most of my time in and out of hospitals undergoing chemotherapy. It was a very tough time, as I was uncertain if I would survive the ordeal, or if I would ever get back to anything resembling a normal life again. In January of 2023, I won my fight against cancer and still continue to be cancer free to this day. Most of the early months of 2023 was spent undergoing physical therapy to strengthen my body, as well as undergoing the process of being fitted for a prosthetic leg. From the very start of my journey to fight cancer and learn to adapt to being an amputee, I knew that I couldn’t give up on myself. There was no point in pushing others away and feeling sorry for myself during that time, because no amount of tears I shed would make my leg suddenly grow back. It was then that I came up with the pseudonym, Bobby Bionic. In part I was inspired by the quote from ‘The Six Million Dollar Man’, ‘Gentlemen, we can rebuild him, we have the technology’. This is especially significant once I actually received my prosthetic leg and spent weeks learning to walk with it, first with a walker, then with a cane, and occasionally without either.
It became symbolic of my journey towards getting healthy, getting stronger, and getting back on my feet again.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
1. Trust/Faith: I know they may seem like two separate things, but for me they are interlinked because I had to have trust as well as faith that things were going to get better for me during my cancer and amputation ordeal. I had to put my trust and faith in others and allow them to help me at a time when I was incapable of helping myself. Whether its being bathed, having the catheter cleaned and emptied, being dressed, being pushed around in a wheelchair, trying to balance myself on a walker or trying to use crutches, I had to put aside my pride and just put my faith and trust in others and let people help me until I was strong enough to do things on my own. Putting your trust and faith in others is also a great quality to possess as an actor, where you trust that the director knows what he/she is doing to put together whatever vision they wish to execute for their project. You have to develop a good trust and faith with your fellow actors, and also ensure that they in turn can put their faith and trust in you. This is especially true when you are filming something and you are able to nail the lines and the emotion that is asked of you for a particular scene in one or two takes. In addition, when it comes to stage craft, you have to trust that your fellow actors will know all of their lines, and you have to ensure them that you will know all of your lines and be able to help out if a fellow actor misses a cue for their next line, and you are able to keep things going so that there isn’t any ‘dead air’.
2. Patience: The value of patience is an important quality to possess in any situation, because trying to rush through things without thought or careful consideration can end up causing more harm than good. Early in my recovery I attempt to use crutches, despite not having a prosthetic leg yet, and it was without supervision and I ended up taking a tumble and it hurt, physically and emotionally. I tried doing something when I wasn’t ready to do, I paid a minor price for it. Even throughout my ordeal I had to learn patience, I was laid up in the hospital recovering from amputation surgery and undergoing chemotherapy for over a month. I couldn’t go to work, I couldn’t see my friends, I couldn’t act on stage, I couldn’t even get out of bed without excruciating pain. I had to be patient, I had to focus on beating cancer, training myself physically to handle standing on one leg, training and teaching myself to do things I used to with ease before, and then undergo physical therapy once I had received the prosthetic limb in order to walk again. Patience is also a useful skill in the realm of acting, because sometimes you have to have patience in order to better understand what the director wants in order to execute their vision and how it connects to your character, and in particular how you interact with your fellow actors.
3. Perseverance: it is this quality of holding onto hope and being steadfast in order to achieve a desired outcome that has been beneficial during my battle against cancer, my journey towards getting back on my feet again, as well as during my acting endeavors. This particular quality ties in well with patience, because it is that notion of remaining steadfast even in the face of insurmountable difficulty, so it becomes all the more satisfying when you are able to achieve your goals. For me it was beating cancer, learning to push myself in the wheelchair, getting back behind the wheel of a car, transferring myself from my wheelchair onto the bed or a couch or a toilet seat, or even getting into a shower stall with a shower chair in order to bathe myself. In addition, perseverance is a quality one must possess in the acting world. You can go on a number of different auditions, and sometimes you get cast in something, and sometimes not. You always hope that you will get cast every time you audition, but that’s not always the case. Sometimes you can end up hitting a dry spell in terms of acting opportunities and months or even years will pass without getting cast in anything. It can be disheartening and discouraging, but it doesn’t need to be. Not allowing oneself to be disheartened or discouraged by disappointment is a good quality to have, because there’s always another opportunity that awaits in order to give you to chance to show off your skills. In addition, you should always be open to learning more about your craft and about other aspects of the craft: directing, sound, lighting, etc. The more skills and knowledge you possess, the more beneficial and vital you can become.
Before we go, any advice you can share with people who are feeling overwhelmed?
When I feel overwhelmed, whether its by work or by responsibilities, I have a small momentary freak out. After getting that out of my system, I then take a moment to step back and really think about what’s important. The important thing is to prioritize things from greatest importance to least importance. When you take care of the important things right away, it leaves you room to handle the least important things.
When I was diagnosed with cancer and lost my left leg, I had to surrender my car because I couldn’t afford it any longer. The important thing for me was to undergo the treatment needed to beat cancer, to heal the wounds on my stump, undergo physical therapy, get fitted with a prosthetic leg and learn to utilize that leg as a normal part of my every day life, THEN get back to work, THEN get myself a car again.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bobbybionic35/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/bobbyshaddoe
Image Credits
Carrollwood Players Theater, Interchangeable Parts, Tarpon Arts, Prosthetics Clinic of Florida, Orlando Regional Medical, Stage West Playhouse
