Meet Sharmilla Fassbender

Alright – so today we’ve got the honor of introducing you to Sharmilla Fassbender . We think you’ll enjoy our conversation, we’ve shared it below.

Sharmilla , appreciate you making time for us and sharing your wisdom with the community. So many of us go through similar pain points throughout our journeys and so hearing about how others overcame obstacles can be helpful. One of those struggles is keeping creativity alive despite all the stresses, challenges and problems we might be dealing with. How do you keep your creativity alive?

As a mother of 4, life is constantly on the go. At first, I found myself feeling resentment that I couldnt find the opportunity to enjoy more deliberate forms of creativity – like crafting or painting. It felt like I was always on someone else’s time, and there wasn’t opportunity for me to get creative. However, I took a step back and reevaluated. Instead of trying to change the situation, I shifted my mindset. That’s the beauty with creativity isn’t it? There’s no “wrong” way to be creative. I realized that I was being creative all the time, just in different form! From making up songs for my children, to finding more efficient ways to get something done, creativity has always been at the forefront of my day to day life. Having said that, I do jump at opportunities to engage in writing, crafting and painting every chance I get.

Let’s take a small detour – maybe you can share a bit about yourself before we dive back into some of the other questions we had for you?

Writing was a big part of my upbringing. As children, my parents encouraged us to write about everything. Each time we came back from vacation, for example, we were told to write about our trip. At the time, it seemed like such a chore but it made a very big impact in nurturing my writing ability. I always fancied seeing my name on a book but never gave it too much thought. That changed after having children. We read a lot of stories together and I felt very strongly about wanting to leave something tangible for them. I thought, what better way than to do this with stories! This was the beginning of Books for Growing Minds. It is a collaborative effort between my sister, Sharminey Selvanathan and myself. With backgrounds in psychology and early childhood education, we knew we wanted to write stories for children with themes surrounding social-emotional situations they could face in their early development. ‘Making Friends Together’ is the first in a planned series of books and is a story about making someone new feel welcomed. Written in rhyme form, it has 6 characters, each with their own unique characteristics. Subsequent books will feature these characters as well and will address different scenarios like winning/losing, being comfortable with your abilities and sharing, to name a few.

Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?

Experience, Vision & Perserverance.
Between our educational backgrounds (mine in Bachelor of Psychology & Masters in Counseling; Sharminey’s in Bachelor of Psychology), experience in our respective industries (mine in Applied Behaviour Analysis and Sharminey’s in early childhood education), as well continual education in children’s writing, I believe my sister and I bring an enriched perspective to our stories. We had spoken to numerous publishers and although they were all interested in our book, they wanted to print it as soft/hard cover copies as board book printing is an expensive and volatile market post COVID. We had always envisioned Making Friends Together as a board book and with research and consulting, we decided on the self publishing route. Having a clear vision of exactly what we wanted helped us keep to our goals, but there were definitely some challenges – a major one being that Print on Demand platforms that are available to self publishers, did not print board books. Additionally, we learned later that major retail bookstores only bought books from these platforms. However, with patience, persistence, and with the continual support of our families, we peservered through it all. Making Friends Together not only won the Golden Wizard Book Prize, but it was also Book of the Year Finalist in the 0-5 age category of 2023. We market our book through social media and sell our books through our website, as well as to independent book stores and retailers.
As I continue to learn and grow as an author, the best advise I can give from my experience so far is that having a clear vision and researching this vision, is key. Ask questions, seek out other authors and networking helped us a great deal too.

Thanks so much for sharing all these insights with us today. Before we go, is there a book that’s played in important role in your development?

I have always been an avid reader but it wasn’t until the last couple of years that I have dabbled in non fiction. Of the many books, Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman has been one of the most profound books I have read and in my opinion, should be mandatory reading for everyone. The book details scientific discoveries, data from experiments and explains character formations of a person from a very young age. It justifies the important of Emotional Intelligence (EQ) in all areas of life. Without giving too much away, it discusses the notion that while IQ is important, it is EQ that contributes significantly to one’s overall success and quality of life. If you were to read one book this year, make it this one.

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