We’re excited to introduce you to the always interesting and insightful Stella Grimaldi. We hope you’ll enjoy our conversation with Stella below.
Hi Stella, thank you so much for opening up with us about some important, but sometimes personal topics. One that really matters to us is overcoming Imposter Syndrome because we’ve seen how so many people are held back in life because of this and so we’d really appreciate hearing about how you overcame Imposter Syndrome.
Imposter syndrome has been one of my biggest challenges as a creative person, especially in the realm of the performing arts. I come from a low income background but grew up yearning to do musical theatre, a field that is notoriously expensive to maintain a career in. Since there weren’t super accessible programs in my community, I didn’t have a real performance outlet until high school. I was extremely ambitious within my public high school’s theatre program and I begged my parents for voice lessons, which ended up being integral to my growth and confidence. My family wanted me to have these experiences and saw how happy they made me, but they imposed a huge financial burden. I felt both grateful and guilty about this, but I couldn’t shake the notion that these opportunities were still not enough.
As a young teen on the internet I chronically Instagram-stalked the true triple-threat (acting, singing, dancing) performers my age or younger. I convinced myself it was impossible to ever compete with them and that at 14/15 years old I had wasted my life doing my best as a normal kid. It was huge for me to even take voice lessons while they took studio acting classes and had seemingly been in dance classes since they were born. I constantly thought about how I could catch up with them. A B.F.A program in Musical Theatre was out since I wasn’t a dancer. This wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, though- in my heart I didn’t really want to compromise my other academic interests, and I didn’t want to exclusively perform in musicals anymore.
I knew that I wanted to pursue a double-major in a Theatre B.A. and something more humanities-based, which ended up being an interdisciplinary B.A. in Law, History and Culture. As a first-generation college student, I was both thrilled and terrified to commit to the University of Southern California. So I moved from Atlanta to Los Angeles dreading how “behind” I would feel compared to my peers, mainly in the theatre program. I had a lot of faith in myself academically and knew that my non-theatre/acting activities would come more easily to me. Having a different background wasn’t as visible in that context, and it wasn’t necessarily a disadvantage. But as I had predicted, most of my peers in the theatre program went in with much more professional experience than I did.
My first couple of acting classes were laden with anxiety about looking amateur or untalented, but my love for what I was learning ultimately superseded that and continued to do so throughout my college experience. The ongoing hard work led to the payoff of improvement, increased appreciation in the art, and self-discovery. It was strange to see my standards and goals changing- I’d never be the triple threat who could kick her leg above her head, but that wasn’t really what I wanted anymore, and I grew more comfortable accepting that. Recognizing my improvement and potential as an actor took a long time, but by junior year I started really coming into my own. By the time I graduated I felt prepared and assured that I was on the same level as the people I once saw as unreachable.
Overcoming imposter syndrome requires ongoing proactivity and persistence and I would be lying if I said I don’t still struggle with it sometimes, but it’s to a much lesser extent. I take a lot of pride in that. My love of learning is so much stronger than my insecurity.
Appreciate the insights and wisdom. Before we dig deeper and ask you about the skills that matter and more, maybe you can tell our readers about yourself?
I’m extremely grateful for journey as a first-generation college student because it highlighted my desire to make the most of every opportunity. I honestly never took any of my resources at USC for granted: financial aid, for one thing, including funding from the school to take extra classes. This enabled me to earn a B.A. in Theatre (Acting Emphasis), a B.A. in Law, History, and Culture, and a minor in Musical Theatre in four years. I was honored to receive the USC Renaissance Scholar distinction and prize, which I’m hoping to use toward grad school soon- ideally a PhD in Theatre (I miss academia!)
To backtrack, I got my Law, History, and Culture degree knowing that I was interested in the subject matter but not really knowing where it would lead me after. I also can’t pretend part of my decision wasn’t also out of necessity. With the exception of a lucky few, acting alone doesn’t pay the bills. I picked this major knowing I wanted my day job to be intellectually stimulating. While I don’t want to be a lawyer, I work in the legal field as a Conflicts Analyst and I’ve found it to be just that. I truly learn new things every day. It’s a niche field I ended up finding myself in by accident, but I’ve found it really valuable.
When I’m not working, though, I try to be creative as much as possible. I stayed in Los Angeles after I graduated in 2021, and while getting back into performing felt slow after COVID, I feel really grateful for the experiences I’ve had in various classes and productions. My most exciting acting experience post-grad has been playing the titular role in David P. Johnson’s musical Sally Spectre. I hadn’t led a musical in ages, much less an original one that was actively being workshopped. It was immensely creatively fulfilling and I met so many amazing friends and collaborators.
Looking back, what do you think were the three qualities, skills, or areas of knowledge that were most impactful in your journey? What advice do you have for folks who are early in their journey in terms of how they can best develop or improve on these?
1) Self-respect: This is so essential to your interpersonal relationships, whether personal or professional. As a young woman I’ve so often been underestimated, taken advantage of, or disrespected, and building a foundation of self respect (namely through therapy) has helped me to create more separation between others’ projections and my own self-esteem.
2) Honesty: With others and yourself. It isn’t easy (especially the latter).
3) Curiosity: Nothing has been better for my self-care and personal happiness than trying new hobbies or reading about something that interests me, even if it isn’t the means to an end. Of course curiosity has been useful to my career journey too, but it’s the little day-to-day things that really energize me.
Okay, so before we go, is there anyone you’d like to shoutout for the role they’ve played in helping you develop the essential skills or overcome challenges along the way?
No one has taught me more than the incredible triad of my mom and her parents, my Ammy and Papa. My grandparents were more like additional parental figures to my brother and I growing up and I feel unbelievably lucky to have such close, loving relationships with them. They have been there for us and for each other in the darkest of times.
My Papa passed away very suddenly last summer and the grief that’s ensued has been, and undoubtedly will remain, one of the biggest challenges of my life. But ironically it’s his lasting impact that allows me to move through my grief rather than drown in it. There are really no words to describe how powerful his love and support still is, and I have no doubt he’ll continue to teach me things the rest of my life.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: @stellaemelia
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stella-g-143a47112/
- Other: Substack: https://stellaemelia.substack.com/
Pauline & Her Sadie (short film): https://www.onyx-films.com/episode-4-pauline-and-her-sadie
Image Credits
Headshot: Deirdre Fahey Photography
